Friday, October 29, 2010

Oh, Sweet Mystery of Life at Last I've Found You



1. "Can't... breathe... seriously... can't... breathe..."

2. "Oh, coach. You've made me the happiest wide receiver in the world. Yes, yes I will marry you!"

3 "I feel so safe when you hold me close and swaddle me in your moobs."

4."McRib is back! McRib is back! Thank God Almighty, McRib is back!"

5. "Oh, yeah. That vertabrae is totally smashed, and I think I just severed your spinal cord. I probably shouldn't have picked you up to check."

Best of Whacko
Coach finally began to diet when the gravitational pull of his body mass started to attract smaller nearby objects.

Best of Vinney
The real reason "excessive celebration" became a penalty.

Best of blue
When I said us fat people needed to stick together, I didn't mean like this!

Best of dub
Fox's newest show "BJ for the Bear" proved to be just a bit too much.

Best of Dr. Doom
"Come on coach, let me go already", cried Bobby, "We're just warming up here - the game hasn't even started yet!"

Threadwinner: molson
The bad touch Bears.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Seriously Coach Kettle, the AMA says that 68-inch gut means you're a dead man walking!

Best of Submariner
You. Me. A bar of Dial. A bottle of red. The showers; after the team leaves...

Best of dadoctah
The reason this will be the *last* season for "So You Think You Can Dance?"

14 comments:

Adriane said...

Son - the only way I could have been more proud of your home run today, would be if we were actually playing baseball ...

Whacko said...

Coach finally began to diet when the gravitational pull of his body mass started to attract smaller nearby objects.

Anonymous said...

The real reason "excessive celebration" became a penalty.

Vinney

blue said...

When I said us fat people needed to stick together, I didn't mean like this!

dub said...

Fox's newest show "BJ for the Bear" proved to be just a bit too much.

dadoctah said...

"...and I will hug him and pet him and squeeze him and call him George!"

Dr. Doom said...

"Come on coach, let me go already", cried Bobby, "We're just warming up here - the game hasn't even started yet!"

molson said...

The bad touch Bears.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Pot Calls Kettle Black
Seriously Coach Kettle, the AMA says that 68-inch gut means you're a dead man walking!

-OR-

While the local bishop reviews instant replays over and over and over and over and over, school administrators nervously await a decision on Father O'Reilly's new Mandatory Hugs Rule.

Submariner said...

You rolled over the RB after tackling him? My BABY! You're getting it - you're finally getting it!

Submariner said...

You. Me. A bar of Dial. A bottle of red. The showers; after the team leaves...

Submariner said...

Ang Lee's remake of "Brian's Song" is about what you'd expect.

dadoctah said...

The reason this will be the *last* season for "So You Think You Can Dance?"

Kaptain Krude said...

Uh, guys? The music stopped 10 minutes ago.