Monday, August 16, 2010

Vacation to Victory

AOS HQ via Al

1. The president's desire for a quiet vacation was spoiled by Katie Couric and Chris Matthews chanting "Lose the shirt!" whenever he approached the beach.

2. As his approval ratings tanked further, Obama took to carrying a towel everywhere, and demanding that NASA "Signal the Vogons, I'm ready to go."

3. Ah, summer vacation. A $1,600 Versace beach towel M'Chel picked up in Spain, a bottle of cheap vodka from Patrick Kennedy, and a copy of Heather Has Two Mommies given to him by Elena Kagan.

4. "Something about this feels wrong. Shouldn't schoolchildren be singing hymns to me and strewing rose petals in my path?"

5. "This looks like a good place for a mosque."

..............................Best of HLam
Pres. Zero thought bubble, "Left...Right...Left...Right...Left...Right..."

Best of Double the U
I was hoping to get out of Washington for a nice change of scenery. God I kill me.

Best of Rodney Dill
"Life's a beach... and so is Michelle."

Best of Rodney Dill
...with prayer rug in hand.

Best of Vinney
"Shit, my wife goes to Spain and I'm on the Jersey Coast with freakin' Snooki"!

Best of Jay Guevara
Obama thought bubble: "I really appreciate my boss giving me some time off. Mr. Soros is nice that way."

Best of Mr Hankey
The folks at the beach think that Obama is looking at them, but it's just that he's reading his book via teleprompters.

Best of molson
Now where did I put that dildo?

28 comments:

Dactyl said...

WV: phicub. Even the Cubbies don't want to be associated with this guy so they moved to Philadelphia. The Pirates were very understanding.

prince of leaves said...

Responding to criticism that his family's lifestyle is too extravagant, Barry economizes by borrowing M'Chel's designer beach slippers instead of buying his own flip-flops.

Passionate Conservative said...

Right, like HE's going to go tan.

Steve O said...

And now for "The Afternoon of Recovery."

Because being President is HARD.

marco said...

Obama wanders the grounds of a recent vacation compound, looking for the book club meeting he agreed to facilitate. He couldn't resist when told the topic was "Rules for Radicals" and he could show off his Alinsky-inscribed first edition.

HLam said...

Pres. Zero thought bubble, "Left...Right...Left...Right...Left...Right..."

Double the U said...

I was hoping to get out of Washington for a nice change of scenery. God I kill me.

dadoctah said...

Steve Urkel has really let himself go.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Thawtbubble- Damn, just stepped in a pile of that waterdog's poop. Eeewwww! What the hell does the chef feed that mutt?

-OR-

The Money Shot
No, not one of the chicken-legged ahole walking across the lawn... the one of the Penthouse Forum issue tucked inside his fake novel.

-OR-

Hi ho, hi ho
It's off to work I go.
The country's a mess but I'm oblivi-ess!
Hi ho, hi ho!
Hi ho, hi ho!
It's off to work I go.
Economy's distressed, and I couldn't care less!
Hi ho, hi ho
Hi ho, hi ho!
It's off to work I go.
You fools elected me, thinking I'd represent you?
Hell, I'm pro-illegals, pro-muslims, too!
Citizens who want rights oughtta buy a politician or two!
Hi ho, hi ho

-OR-

Do Nothing Congress, Meet Do Nothing Right Lame Duck
Crap, where's the damn door? It was around here someplace. If I wander around outside much longer, I'm gonna miss Oprah.

Dr. Doom said...

Looks like the middle class is safe for a couple of hours...

JohnS1959 said...

"Ahh", thought the President, "I wonder what the little people are doing this afternoon?"

JohnS1959 said...

"It's quite a dilemma", thought the President, "Should I bow to the Hawaiian royal family or not? They are royal but they are also American..."

Jack Reacher said...

Oh, nice for him. The attendees at the press conference need hip waders and hats, though.

Jack Reacher said...

Concept #231 for the new "What, me worry?" photo on Mad Magazine.

Rodney Dill said...

"Life's a beach... and so is Michelle."

Rodney Dill said...

...with prayer rug in hand.

Rodney Dill said...

"...all I need is my towel, HHGTTG, and 'ol Janx spirit..."

Anonymous said...

"Man, I need a vacation in the worst way. When was my last? Two week ago."

Vinney

blue said...

Question: Will Obama be a one term president?
Answer: Who knows if he will last that long!

Anonymous said...

"Shit, my wife goes to Spain and I'm on the Jersey Coast with freakin' Snooki"!

Vinney

dadoctah said...

As vacations go, this sure beats the stuffing out of clearing brush in Crawford.

Jay Guevara said...

Obama thought bubble: "This Presidentin' is all go."

Anonymous said...

Obama thought bubble: "I really appreciate my boss giving me some time off. Mr. Soros is nice that way."

Jay Guevara said...

Sorry, anonymous 9:43 pm was me.

One more: "Guess I put 'paid' to the 'lazy and shiftless' knock on us."

Steve O said...

Oh come on. Like you'd rather he be in Washington.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Who does a guy have to bow to to get a drink around here?"

Mr Hankey said...

The folks at the beach think that Obama is looking at them, but it's just that he's reading his book via teleprompters.

molson said...

Now where did I put that dildo?