Monday, June 28, 2010

On the Beach with Charlie Tuna


1. "She'd be a lot sexier if she had, like, eyes and stuff."

2. Even though he supported Obama's job-killing moratorium, Crist couldn't help thinking "Drill, Baby, Drill" as he walked the beach.

3. Despite his resemblance to Leslie Neilson, Crist completely failed to get any response to his "Nice beaver" line.

4. Marco Rubio or a dingus who walks on a sandy beach in Gucci loafers. Floriduh, the choice is yours.

5. "Well, I appreciate the offer, young lady, but by now you must know that I only kiss Obama's ass!"

Best of Vinney
A drunken Charlie Crist snidely remarked, "Hey honey, let me show you my plan to plug the damn hole."

Best of Jack Reacher
"That reminds me; pick up a couple of firm, ripe melons at Publix."

Best of Uchuck the Tuchuck
It's gotta be tar balls, 'cause oil sheen doesn't shake that way!

Best of Vinney
"You're nothing but a f&*kin' whore"!
"Watch your language young lady."

Best of Army of Dad
"...and from now on I want to be known as Gov. Thursday!"

Best of Steve O
Leslie Neilson's latest movie isn't any funnier, but IS better.

Best of dub
Junk Shot...Money Shot...whatever...

Best of Kaptain Krude
"That thong... I must have it!"

21 comments:

dadoctah said...

Nice ass and all, but I can't help thinking she must be *covered* with tarballs.

Army of Dad said...

"I was just checking to see if her suit is incompliance with local laws, honest!"

Anonymous said...

A drunken Charlie Crist snidely remarked, "Hey honey, let me show you my plan to plug the damn hole."

Vinney

Jack Reacher said...

"That reminds me; pick up a couple of firm, ripe melons at Publix."

Jack Reacher said...

"I was turned on, until I saw her CATO Institute tattoo. Stupid free-marketers."

WV: comensin. He'd like to, he'd like to.

Anonymous said...

While Charlie Crist pondered the oil leak problem, the obvious solution hit him like a bolt of lightning- tampons.

Vinney

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

It's gotta be tar balls, 'cause oil sheen doesn't shake that way!

Anonymous said...

Charlie, you are not even playing a RINO anymore, just come out of the closet.

Anonymous said...

"And so you can see", said the Governor, "why these beaches must not be damaged".

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Girls, please stop walking on the beach. Your thunder thighs are drowning out the pleasant sounds of the sea, the surf, the oil.

-OR-

Thawtballoon - Cushions and pillows belong on sofas and beds, not butts and thighs.

-OR-

The Annual Cattlemen's Assoc. Beach Party wouldn't be complete without a herd of overly-marbled heifers ambling by.

Anonymous said...

"You're nothing but a f&*kin' whore"!

"Watch your language young lady."

Vinney

Army of Dad said...

Nope, dub would want to harpoon that one too.

Army of Dad said...

"...and from now on I want to be known as Gov. Thursday!"

Army of Dad said...

"Hey baby you want to find my weapon of ass destruction?"

Steve O said...

Leslie Neilson's latest movie isn't any funnier, but IS better.

blue said...

"I'd like to put a wiener in her buns!"

dub said...

Junk Shot...Money Shot...whatever...

dub said...

Hey baby, wanna come back to my room and see my Oscar Meyer Weiner costume?

Kaptain Krude said...

"That thong... I must have it!"

Kaptain Krude said...

"Black thong with a white top on a tan body? Philistine!"

Kaptain Krude said...

"I'm looking for a few good men."
"So am I!"