Friday, May 28, 2010

Give her a Hand

AoM

1. Thing has been hanging out with the Kennedies way too long.

2. "They are spectacular, but I can't tell if they're real yet."

3. Week Four of Ex-Gay therapy, "touching a woman" was where most washed out.

4. "Oh, I don't mind. I'm used to it. I did an internship with David Letterman."

5. "Oh, hi Uncle Fred. Yeah, I have grown up into a fine young lady. So, you still have to check in with the local police every time you move?"

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bill Clinton's secret desire after the presidency was to become a carny and guess girls bra sizes.

Vinney

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Perspectives
Timmy will brag to his friends that he got to 2nd base.
Jane will look puzzled and ask, "Timmy who?"

curly said...

Did you plug the hole yet, Daddy?

curly said...

Handjob, the "PG" rated version.

dub said...

Worst.Deformity.Ever.

dub said...

Shelly's Hand is not nearly as interesting as Kate's Hoof.

dadoctah said...

In this upcoming low-budget horror film, surgeons graft the right hand of an executed killer onto the left shoulder of a prom queen. Hijinks ensue.

Jack Reacher said...

Cheryl was mighty peeved when she learned the "cup size facilitator" wasn't actually employed by the store.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Okay, now will all priests who support our open letter to the pope demanding an end to celibacy please raise your hands?
Eh, a bit higher if you don't mind, Father Flannigan.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

I'm not saying she waves funny, but habitually patting herself on the back has begun to affect Sonya's posture.

blue said...

Willie knew how to do the Hand Jive