1. Curious George never should have started hanging out with Lindsay Lohan.
2. "Soylent Green is made out of Orangutans!"
3. This is what happens when you dress for a Plushy Convention and it turns out to be a Cop Uniform Fetish Convention.
4. "I'm a progressive blogger! I have a Constitutional Right to fling feces at Sarah Palin!"
5. "This is a madhouse! A madhouse!"