1. "C'mon! This is one of my Holy Boogers. Katie Couric would give her left testicle for one of these."
2. "Does this look infected?"
3. "And yesterday some skinny white boys were standing on top of a slag heap pointing... like this. I didn't get that one either."
4. "Yo, Steve. My eyes are up here."
5. Everyone was amazed at Obama's ability to lecture for 54 minutes, off-TelePrompter on the topic of prostate massage.
Best of Vinney
"The next time we have to talk about this I'll have Rahm Emmanuel poke his finger at you while naked. Is that gay enough for you? Humm."
Best of Rodney Dill
Steve waits anxiously, knowing that Obama will eventually relent and bow to him too.
Best of Army of Dad
"Bad Canadian, Bad. Next time you poop on my carpet I will um, have to rub your nose in it!"
Best of Mr. Hankey
Obama poses for the re-painting of the Sistine Chapel.
Best of Maogwai
"You are white, you must bow to ME".
Best of Wesley M.
"...and stop referring to those French fries topped with cheese curd and brown gravy as poutine! You're causing an unhelpful international incident with each bowl!"
Best of Submariner
Don't even THINK about running for Governor of New York!
Best of Jay Guevara
"I didn't hear a harrumph out of you!"
Best of Targetpractice
I am the Messiah! The greatest president in US history! YOU WILL PULL MY FINGER!
Best of Submariner
What exactly did you mean by sending davenport material to my wife and suggesting she "make another dress?"
Best of andthenblammo!
"I, um, I love hockey. The Chicago Blankhawks were my favorite, uh, hockey team. I thought Ron Santo was the greatest center ever!"
Best of Dactyl
Yo, can you explain curling to me?
Best of Double the U
I was wondering if you could stop sending all that cold air down from Canada in the winter.
Best of Steve O
Best of mega
"I was supposed to get a 10 point bump after I copied your stupid-ass health care system, cracker."