Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Meanwhile, in a New Jersey Rest Area


1. Illegal cockfights remain a problem in many urban areas.

2. Calvin Klein and Tommy Hilfiger work out the final details of their merger.

3. Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow finally decide whose is bigger. Maddow wins.

4. "No kidding! I love Twilight too!"

5. "Damn it, Rahm! I'm still not voting for health care!"

Best of Army of Dad
ORA: Don't cross the streams...it would be bad.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
TENDER MOMENT @ Lilith Fair: After being disqualified in Round One for refusing to wax, two hirsute Thursday Babe wannabes console each other on the banks of the Bitchydoomie River.

Best of dadoctah
All across America, gladiators and guys who've been in a Turkish prison pause to pay a final tribute to the late Captain Clarence Ouver.

Best of Silhouette
blah blah Wonder Twins Powers Activate blah blah Ang Lee Remake

Best of Matt the K
"Bubba, when you said you wanted to go up my dirt path, I thought you meant this here one on my property."

Best of metalgarth
I see Adam Lambert is making a video for "Pants on the Ground"

Best of Vinney
Barney Frank- The Wonder Years.

Best of Rodney Dill
worst.lesbian.prOn.ever

Best of dub
Flame On....yeah, no kidding.

Best of molson
How does this contest work again?

Best of Mr Hankey
Paula still has clandestine meetings with the American Idol participants.

Best of Submariner
Nothin' ta be seein' here, folks;
'Tis jist two French girls greetin' each other after their summer break. Please ta be movin' along, now...

Threadwinner: Submariner
So, Governor, come here often?

35 comments:

dub said...

Dude 1: What's your stance on universal healthcare?

Dude 2: Wide.

dub said...

Meanwhile, in a Catholic church across town, Father O'Pedo meats his newest altar boy.

dub said...

Um, I dont think this is what they meant when the Democrats said we should put our heads together to solve the healthcare problem.

Anonymous said...

A Kevin Jennings success story. Boys having sex wearing Underoos.

Vinney

Army of Dad said...

ORA: Don't cross the streams...it would be bad.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

TENDER MOMENT @ Lilith Fair: After being disqualified in Round One for refusing to wax, two hirsute Thursday Babe wannabes console each other on the banks of the Bitchydoomie River.

-OR-

"So, we braid our pubic hair together and wait for sunset and we're legally married. Is this really how they do it in Polynesia??
[It must be sad to be bi-curious AND gullible]

-OR-

A Mondegreen Metaphor: It's a treat to beat your meat on the Mississipi mud.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

I really do know how to spell Mississippi, just bummed that my "rescue the pussy from a tree" caption wasn't picked for the hoop dreams photo.

WordVerify: pelevisa - After Tiger confessed to being an uberjerkoff, visa needed a new sports celeb endorser. GOALLLLLLLLL

HLam said...

Recycling a Cap This from a week ago: "You say your name is Ben? Ben Dover?"

dadoctah said...

All across America, gladiators and guys who've been in a Turkish prison pause to pay a final tribute to the late Captain Clarence Ouver.

Silhouette said...

blah blah Wonder Twins Powers Activate blah blah Ang Lee Remake

dadoctah said...

Hot Tub Time Machine: the director's cut.

Matt the K said...

"Bubba, when you said you wanted to go up my dirt path, I thought you meant this here one on my property."

metalgarth said...

I see Adam Lambert is making a video for "Pants on the Ground"

Anonymous said...

Barney Frank- The Wonder Years.

Vinney

divine miss m said...

So that's what they mean by "pants on the ground."

Jay Guevara said...

Democrat "caucus."

blue said...

too disgusting to waste time captioning

dadoctah said...

What the *hell* have the guys in airport security come up with this time?

Rodney Dill said...

worst.lesbian.prOn.ever

(WV: enunni - 'bout sums it up)

Rodney Dill said...

The 2010 remake of -- Stand By Me

Rodney Dill said...

Brokeback Flyfishing

Rodney Dill said...


Lookin' like a fool with your pants on the ground.

curly said...

Barack Back Mountain

curly said...

At Wal-Mart’s “Michael Jackson Sale-athon”, boys’ pants were half off.

dub said...

Flame On....yeah, no kidding.

molson said...

How does this contest work again?

molson said...

Does this mean we're gay?

curly said...

Fugde packin': yur doin' it wrong.

Mr Hankey said...

Paula still has clandestine meetings with the American Idol participants.

Jay Guevara said...

Ben Dover meets Hugh G. Rexson.

Adriane said...

Never criticize a man 'til you've walked a mile in his shoes.

Never criticize a backdoor man 'til you've run a mile in his shoes, with your pants around your ankles after hearing a card door slam...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Military Career Path?

-OR-

Oh jeez, I thought YOU had the key to the penis lock!!!
Quiet, did you hear something?
Dammit, someone's coming!
That was me, stupid. Stop rubbing!
How are we going to explain this to the wives?
I dunno... we were jumped by Canadian Mounties? No, wait... feminists from Lilith Fair hopped up on testosterone pills.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

MORAL: Never mix alcohol and Chinese Finger Traps on the school field trip.

WordVerify: inglyse - Sadly, without an immigration moratorium, this has become the language of the land.

Submariner said...

Nothin' ta be seein' here, folks;
'Tis jist two French girls greetin' each other after their summer break. Please ta be movin' along, now...

Submariner said...

So, Governor, come here often?