Monday, March 08, 2010

Begging the Obvious Captions


1. M'Chel was furious to discover a slight belly roll on the kindergartner.

2. After a third child had his head bitten off, the White House made a note to cancel M'Chel's public appearance whenever she was PMSing.

3. M'Chel was furious. "Tell me who threw the cream pie, or the child dies!"

4. The updated fairy-tale The Empress Is Wearing an Ugly Dress Made From Sofa Upholstery had a very different, very gory ending.

5. Hillary fumed in impotent rage. "She's eating all the best children herself!"

Beast of Army of Dad
"Give me the money of the halfling gets it!"

Beast of Rodney Dill
What's in your rugrat?

Beast of mega
"Straddling the Erection" was considered a light-hearted photo book suitable for 3rd graders or "especially mature" 1st and 2nd graders.

Beast of molson
The Orcs blamed the blue eyed white skinned devils for their banking system collapse, but the real cause was the Orcs are just bad at math.

Beast of Mr. Hankey
Someone fed Michelle after midnight...

Beast of Dactyl
Yeah, I love kids. I can never eat a whole one though, I usually just order the half rack.

Beast of dadoctah
The last photo Jenny Craig received before unceremoniously dumping Kirstie Alley from her contract.

Beast of GregMan
M'chel looks better than usual in this picture. Did she get a new hairdresser?

Beast of Matt the K
No one knows if it was the mange or the rabies that made Chewbacca go on a toddler-eating rampage.

Beast of Kaptain Krude
"Vote for my husband, or I shall consume your progeny!" The 2012 Presidential campaign began a little early for the Obamas.

Beast of Kaptain Krude
"Too fat, throw it back!" The Rage Virus turned dub into a zombie, but he still had standards, dammit!

33 comments:

Anonymous said...

Like the homosexual agenda, this is another thing the Safe School Czar should really be concerned about.

Vinney

Rodney Dill said...

Orcs generally picked up smoking, drinking, and a few other nasty hobbits.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Uruk-hai's Got Your Credit Card? Losing the new series of Capital One commercials to orcs was humiliating for unemployed vikings.

-OR-

Not content with the success of Thursday Babe, V began to actively promote his anti-vegan Eat Children platform for the next election.

-OR-

PATERNITY SUIT?!?! Don't look nuttin like me, Eowyn! Go sue that scrawny halfling, Pippen.

Rodney Dill said...

What you mean this not Baby Ruth?

Army of Dad said...

I can see what he and Barney Frank have in common, a taste for man flesh.

Army of Dad said...

...and this little hobbit went wee wee wee all the way home.

Army of Dad said...

"Give me the money of the halfling gets it!"

Army of Dad said...

"Sauroman will be pissed. This one is alive, but his pants are definitely spoiled!"

Rodney Dill said...

What's in your rugrat?

Rodney Dill said...

Stacy and Clinton's biggest challenge...

dadoctah said...

When did WWE begin observing Take Your Kids To Work Day?

mega said...

Inviting UN peacekeeping forces into Tulsa was a mistake.

mega said...

You'd be in a rage too if someone threw institutional-gray paint in your face.

mega said...

Furious over having his dental work turned down by Big Insurance, Tim went a little berzerk.

mega said...

"Straddling the Erection" was considered a light-hearted photo book suitable for 3rd graders or "especially mature" 1st and 2nd graders.

blue said...

M'Chel screams with fear as the kid growls at her

dadoctah said...

Lycanthropy affects one in six day-care providers. So please give generously.

dadoctah said...

Chazz Bono tries pathetically and unsuccessfully to reenact a heartwarming moment from his/her own childhood.

molson said...

The Orcs blamed the blue eyed white skinned devils for their banking system collapse, but the real cause was the Orcs are just bad at math.

Mr. Hankey said...

Someone fed Michelle after midnight...

Dactyl said...

Yeah, I love kids. I can never eat a whole one though, I usually just order the half rack.

Submariner said...

Simultaneous scream: "But I wanted a PUPPY!"

robert said...

I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

vw: phopilav -- fear of lavatories?

dadoctah said...

The last photo Jenny Craig received before unceremoniously dumping Kirstie Alley from her contract.

GregMan said...

M'chel looks better than usual in this picture. Did she get a new hairdresser?

GregMan said...

Another SEIU thug takes on a Tea Partier.

GregMan said...

Yet another good metaphor for what this administration is doing to our children's futures.

Mr. Hankey said...

...guess who else wants to be able to get married now...

Matt the K said...

No one knows if it was the mange or the rabies that made Chewbacca go on a toddler-eating rampage...

Matt the K said...

No one knows if it was the mange or the rabies that made Chewbacca go on a toddler-eating rampage.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Vote for my husband, or I shall consume your progeny!" The 2012 Presidential campaign began a little early for the Obamas.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Too fat, throw it back!" The Rage Virus turned dub into a zombie, but he still had standards, dammit!

BradyBunch said...

Orcs, not gangsters, kidnapped the Lindbergh baby on ransom for free health care