Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Behold the Awesome Power of Mullet Man



1. "I should respond to the Mullet Signal by hopping in the Mulletmobile and racing to the scene of the crime... but first, 20 more curls."

2. "My mullet and tight upper body distracts everyone from the cancerous lesion on my right calf."

3. "Mulletman requires laces and velcro to secure the Mulletsneakers to my powerful Mulletfeet."

4. "Nice try, Cletus, but I really don't think Ang Lee wants to do a sequel to Joe Dirt."

5. "I can't stand mullets," Army of Mom seethed. "You better be huge!'

Biblical Best of Dactyl
But were his long denim shorts to be shorn off, his God-given strength would vanish and the Philistines would be victorious.

Best of censors hip
Bud Bundy tones up but still can't get laid

Best of Unscrupulous
He's all business in the front, party in the back, and douche bag all over.

Best of Army of Mom
I can give him a haircut. What worries me is his decorating. What is that on his wall?

Best of Jay Guevara
A pair of dumbells.

Best of Submariner (sort of)
Introducing; V the K's third blogosphere alter-ego, Gregory of Pects

Best of dub
Dont flex so hard and you wont shit all those bricks.

Best of Matt the K
Next up on A&E's "Trailer Park Trimmers", 'Rat Tails: 1/10 the the mullet but three times the meth.'

20 comments:

censors hip said...

Bud Bundy tones up but still can't get laid

Army of Dad said...

"Hey baby, wanna go for a ride in my Camaro?"

Army of Dad said...

Chad is still waiting for the 80's to come back in style.

Anonymous said...

With so many intern applicants there had to be a tie breaker for the job with Anderson Cooper.

Vinney

Army of Mom said...

He has a mullet?

jj said...

How Barry Melrose sees himself.

Unscrupulous said...

He's all business in the front, party in the back, and douche bag all over.

Army of Mom said...

I can give him a haircut. What worries me is his decorating. What is that on his wall?

molson said...

Shampoo won't fix that Tennessee top hat son. We're gonna need the string trimmer.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

The 2010 Mullet Pride Calendar
Miss "Stumpy Leggs" January enjoys lifting little weights, haute couture culottes
Turn Ons - tofu spread on triangles of crustless whole wheat... and world peace
Turn Offs - shoe laces that won't stay tied... and sick intercourses

Jay Guevara said...

Two dumbells.

SamEyeAm said...

Next week on "The Situation's Room"...curls for the girls!

Army of Mom said...

*sing to the Village People tune of Macho Man*

Mullet, Mullet Man. I wanna be a Mullet Man.

Submariner said...

Army of Mom said...
I can give him a haircut. What worries me is his decorating. What is that on his wall?


Where he last finished curling, and started hurling?

Submariner said...

Introducing; Gregory Pects

dub said...

Dont flex so hard and you wont shit all those bricks.

Dactyl said...

But were his long denim shorts to be shorn off, his God-given strength would vanish and the Philistines would be victorious.

Adriane said...

Next up on Fashion Eye for the Mullet Guy ... tackling our Biggest Challenge Ever!

Matt the K said...

Next up on A&E's "Trailer Park Trimmers", 'Rat Tails: 1/10 the the mullet but three times the meth.'

mega said...

In exiting his teens, Tim realized he should stop waiting for Obama's promised "20 pounds of bicep muscle for every American as a human right", and actually earn it.