Friday, December 11, 2009

Sweet Lawn Jockey


1. "Yo ho ho! You and me! Little bronze god, how the left loves thee..."

2. Michael Jackson ordered like twenty of these before he died, but only this one is in a pose suitable for public display.

3. To assure authenticity, the Chinese government had an actual Kenyan child encased in bronze, because human life is cheap to them.

4. Chris Matthews's new towel holder is... just plain creepy.

5. What the Nativity Scene in the White House was replaced with this year.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Foreigners who eagerly emulate westerners sometimes take things a bit too far. Fer instance, when the quaint tradition of bronzed baby shoes caught on, Filipinos assumed that bronzing entire kids would be really cool.

Best of blue
This recently discovered Indonesian statue showing an 10 year old Barry Soweto with his 1st Nobel Prize has all the Birth-ers frothing at the mouth

Best of Jay Guevara
Kevin Jennings made a fortune franchising his "Camp NAMBLA" concept.

Best of Matt the K
.."And I shall call him... Mini-Gumbel."

Best of Mr. Hankey
As the new mascot for the Government Health Corporation, "Little Barack" has already been awarded the AdForum, Nobel, and Emmy awards for Best Mascot in 2010 - before the year even started.

Best of dadoctah
Alternate Universe Check: what if Gary Coleman *had* been elected governor of California?

Best of GregMan
How appropriate that the statue has it's hand reaching out for your wallet.

Best of chunkstyle
Bring me Solo and the Wookie....bwahahaha

Best of jj
This one should be good with the other ones, the one of him holding the lantern and the one of him peeing.

Best of Mr. Right
Tragically, it was only after carrying the Trojan Messiah into the White House that most Americans found out that a million little Communists were hiding inside waiting to take over the government.

31 comments:

AnonymoUS said...

Ahhhh, to only be a Pigeon.

Rodney Dill said...

Man.... they put those Mickey Mouse statues just everywhere.

Rodney Dill said...

...No statue is complete without continuous loop music.


Get up in the morning, slaving for bread, sir,
so that more can go to the Fed.
For, O bama's right. Aah.

Get up in the morning, slaving for bread, sir,
so that more can go to the Fed.
For, O bama's right. Aah.

A wife and a kids, need universal health care.
'More Taxes,' he says, 'I'll need to receive.'
For, O bama's right. Aah.

credit them a-tear up, the bailout's all gone.
Now you gonna end up in a socialist slide.
For, O bama's right. Aah.

It's getting warm, we done some harm
The globe is outta norm. Gore sounds the alarm.
For, O bama's right. Aah.

(repeat last four)

For, O bama's right. Aah.

For, O bama's right. Aah.

For, O bama's right. Aah.



(Israelites -- Desmond Dekker)

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Lost in Translation
Foreigners who eagerly emulate westerners sometimes take things a bit too far. Fer instance, when the quaint tradition of bronzed baby shoes caught on, Filipinos assumed that bronzing entire kids would be really cool.

blue said...

this recently discovered Indonesian statue showing an 10 year old Barry Soweto with his 1st Nobel Prize has all the Birth-ers frothing at the mouth

Jay Guevara said...

Kevin Jennings made a fortune franchising his "Camp NAMBLA" concept.

Matt the K said...

Rodin's "(L'il) Stinker".

Matt the K said...

Obama's mom was so certain he'd get a Nobel prize some day, she had one bronzed on his statue when he was 5.

Matt the K said...

.."And I shall call him... Mini-Gumbel."

Mr. Hankey said...

...but the White House rejected the statue as not being Gold Plated.

Mr. Hankey said...

As the new mascot for the Government Health Corporation, "Little Barack" has already been awarded the AdForum, Nobel, and Emmy awards for Best Mascot in 2010 - before the year even started.

Mr. Hankey said...

Barack Obama is enshrined at the Little League Hall of Fame, even though he never played the sport.

dadoctah said...

Alternate Universe Check: what if Gary Coleman *had* been elected governor of California?

GregMan said...

Soon the Soetero cult began requiring human sacrifices at the statue of their god.

Usually conservatives.

GregMan said...

Now we know how all those National Endowment for the Arts plans turned out...

GregMan said...

How appropriate that the statue has it's hand reaching out for your wallet.

AnonymoUS said...

Not to be outdone, in Kenya they are erecting one made of dried cow dung and grass.

Anonymous said...

The placard erroneously quotes Bama saying "Whatch you taking about Willis".

Vinney

Passionate Conservative said...

..."Stupid bitch, you're only supposed to bronze their shoes!"

chunkstyle said...

Bring me Solo and the Wookie....bwahahaha

molson said...

What if Chavez and Mini-Me had an illicit love child?

jj said...

This one should be good with the other ones, the one of him holding the lantern and the one of him peeing.

Mr. Right said...

Tragically, it was only after carrying the Trojan Messiah into the White House that most Americans found out that a million little Communists were hiding inside waiting to take over the government.

dadoctah said...

With ever-tighter restrictions on visual pollution, Verizon has had to take extraordinary measures to camouflage its cellular towers.

AnonymoUS said...

That statue looks like something L. Ron Hubbard would design from his grave.

AnonymoUS said...

Stamped at the base of the statue: 'Product of Manchuria'.

Jay Guevara said...

At a secret Presidential training camp in Indonesia, likely prospects are taught the basics of teleprompter reading. And urgently reminded that there are only 50 states.

Anonymous said...

"...and I still have those very same golf shorts."

Double the U said...

Children enjoy watching one of nature's most unique plants, the Obama butterfly trap is about to capture an unsuspecting victim.

Submariner said...

One mol time, chirdlen;

"mmmmm, mmmmmm, mmmmmm; Balack Hussein Obama..."





v word - adadi - What is the relationship between "A Kenyan and a US President?" Alex

Submariner said...

"You like, Mr. President?"

"Yes, Sung Ye, but to be accurate I should be displaying my middle finger in the direction of the U.S..."