Monday, November 23, 2009

Tae Kwan Dork

Brender

1. "I had no idea Klingon females enjoyed being fisted."

2. "I see limp posturing coupled by weakness. Your opponents laugh at your attempts to feign strength and resolve. But enough about your foreign policy..."

3. "When I think about the lack of skin in New Moon, I just get so angry! Soetero Hulk, um, SMASH!"

4. "You could have just asked for arugula, you didn't have to deck the waitress."

5. "Well, you've mastered the 'float like a butterfly' part."

Best of GregMan
"...and then Frank Marshall Davis did this to me!"

Best of metalgarth
WORST. MORTAL KOMBAT. SEQUEL. EVER

Best of Army of Dad
Kung Pow President, now with 75% less Pow!

Best of Passionate Conservative
All you American Politicians know how to do is shop and spend money...

Best of dadoctah
If Jim Kelly and Bruce Lee have let themselves go like this, I don't even want to *know* what John Saxon looks like.

29 comments:

Double the U said...

"You're a regular Jackie Chan, or as we here like to say, 'Owa ana sole uare'

GregMan said...

"...and then Frank Marshall Davis did this to me!"

GregMan said...

Barry shows everyone his angry face.

metalgarth said...

Now show me 'Sand the Floor'

metalgarth said...

WORST. MORTAL KOMBAT. SEQUEL. EVER

Anonymous said...

Psaml 109, verse 8:
(American King James Version)

Let his days be few; and let another take his office.

blue said...

then I hit Hillary in the nuts like this & she has been my bitch ever since

Army of Dad said...

Kung Pow President, now with 75% less Pow!

Army of Dad said...

What are we going to do to the American taxpayer?
Shaft!
You're damn right.

Army of Dad said...

Wonder twin powers activate, form of socialist douche bag!

Army of Dad said...

Everybody was kung fu fighting, like a dim bulb lighting, Obama was only a little bit frightning.

wv: ingent...where that fist is about to go

metalgarth said...

The Affirmative Action Fighting Force of Extrordinary Magnitude has nobody's gratitude

dadoctah said...

One of Oa's diminutive Guardians trains another novice Green Lantern.

blue said...

and this ring gave me my powers....
this precious ring.....

Passionate Conservative said...

All you American Politicians know how to do is shop and spend money...

dadoctah said...

"Killer impression, dude! You totally pwned Shatner!"

Steve O said...

Obama shows the Japanese Premier (a 5th degree black belt in 4 different styles) some "karate" moves he learned from the movies.

mpur said...

And then, after lecturing the Chinese president on economics and social reform, Obama demonstrates the flaws in 2,000 years of Shaolin martial arts tradition AND how to correct them.

Oiao said...

Obama: "Then I reach into the middle class pockets and take all the Change....."

mega said...

"And this is what I did to Landreiu's mom, and then she agreed to play ball."

mega said...

"Ha ha, Mr. President, that's what I do to capitalists, too!"

Rodney Dill said...

Scrolling Teleprompter Kung Fu.

Mr. Hankey said...

Obama learns the necessary moves in case Godzilla ever approaches New York.

dadoctah said...

If Jim Kelly and Bruce Lee have let themselves go like this, I don't even want to *know* what John Saxon looks like.

Steve O said...

Now... projecting weakness through bad form.

Adriane said...

Well on the down side, the Asian diplomacy tour was a bust ... on the good side, the Kung Fu instructional videos were playable here in the US.

Kaptain Krude said...

"And then I fisted the American economy just like this!"

dadoctah said...

"Hah! Got the pebble out of your hand, ass-groper! Guess that means I can leave!"

molson said...

No. No. No. You doing it all wong. You nothing but douchebag.