Wednesday, August 12, 2009

A Woman That Can Handle a Big Gun


1. "Hi, I'm ready to negotiate our divorce settlement, now."

2. Hillary's State Department entourage includes a full-time 'Orgasmatron' operator.

3. Worst part about dating "Iron Man," is how he keeps leaving his sex toys around your place.

4. That's no way to kill roaches! Nice rack, though.

5. How nature says, "Bill Maher, keep your liver-spotted hands offa me!"

Best of Jay Guevara
Best of metalgarth
You left your socks on the sofa. See to it that it doesn't happen again

Best of andthenblammo!
The local punks can forget about robbing Edie's Drive-Thru Burgers again!

Best of divine miss m
They can have my gun when they pry it from my cold, dead, exquisitely manicured hand.

Best of mega
McClaskill's new strategy for using aides to manage unruly Town Halls was met with approval at the DNC.

Best of ShoeChick
For the last time, put the toilet seat down when you are done.

Best of blue
The Impreginator came back from the future & found a white women

29 comments:

Rodney Dill said...

Sure beats the spin cycle.

blue said...

Mom & Dad, please meet M17 your future son-in-law

Silhouette said...

The Epilady is guaranteed to painlessly remove unwanted hair by the root. Results will last for up to 4 weeks! The hair that grows back is lighter and softer, with overall diminishing hair growth over time.

Silhouette said...

"Let's go, Mr. Gladney. You can sell your flags in peace this time, I think."

Barco Sin Vela II said...

As seen on Match dot com;
"I like long walks on the beach, 'Alien' films, meeting new people in far-off lands..."

"Looking for a sensitive guy who likes to cuddle and clean/reload mini-guns".

Viking04 said...

Her favorite toy uses 24 volts, and 7.62.

Jay Guevara said...

Guy off camera: "What's that? Gee, sorry, I'm not sure which way to Berkeley."

metalgarth said...

you left your socks on the sofa. See to it that it doesn't happen again

metalgarth said...

I see that 'Army Wives' is going after a different dempgraphic next season

andthenblammo! said...

The local punks can forget about robbing Edie's Drive-Thru Burgers again!

divine miss m said...

They can have my gun when they pry it from my cold, dead, manicured hand.

Jack Reacher said...

"C'mon, fella; let's hear your pick-up line. Cat got your tongue?"

dadoctah said...

Why the government shouldn't be allowed to take over production of the Sybian.

dub said...

Susie loves a big gun....but with looks like that, I'm betting it will go off within 30 seconds.

mega said...

McClaskill's new strategy for using aides to manage unruly Town Halls was met with approval at the DNC.

mega said...

Hillary to assistant: "When you hear the word 'Bill', aim and shoot."

Adriane said...

No Sir, if I was expecting trouble, I'd have brought the big gun ...

Julie the Jarhead said...

What gun?

Unscrupulous said...

That's fake! There's no such thing as women in combaaaa..... What? Really? You're kidding me. Ohhhh K. Nevermind.

ShoeChick said...

For the last time, put the toilet seat down when you are done.

Anonymous said...

Ha, laugh and joke all you want. I'll bet next weeks lunch money she's a Republican.

blue said...

the Impreginator came back from the future & found a white women

jeff said...

Helping make the Taliban the Talibanned.

Mr. Hankey said...

Julie's right arm was replaced with a new mechanical arm under ObamaCare.

Michael said...

Honey, your makeup is pretty much OK, except you need some eyebrow pencil.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Uh-oh, I'm going to be late for my prom date with Subby!"

Viking04 said...

Her Favorite AC/DC song?
"Thunderstruck"

blue said...

they issued this to me in boot camp & said to have fun with it

dadoctah said...

Aren't you glad Billy Mays died before he got around to making the infomercial for this?