Wednesday, August 19, 2009

The Nuns Just Use a Ruler

Brender

1. Sanjay's treatment had a 90% success rates with curing compulsive masturbators.

2. "But how will we get jobs in technical support now?"

3. The state of Punjab would come to regret enacting a new welfare subsidy for disabled children.

4. The sound of tiny phalanges cracking secretly delighted Sanjay.

5. "But how will we submit captions now?"

Best of The Man
"But how will we do jazz hands now?"

Best of Double the U
Rumble strips... you're doing it wrong!

Best of Army of Dad
Slumdog Childcare.

Best of Army of Dad
The wheels on the bike go round and round....the fingers and the hands go snap snap snap, snap snap snap.

Best of Jack Reacher
"What if we promise not to speak out again at a town hall meeting?"

Best of Unscrupulous
Wow, even their streets are hand-crafted.

Best of mega
Obama turned the throttle slowly. "This takes care of the right-wing Bloggers, but I still need that Fairness Doctrine to shut down the radio."

Best of Matt the K
That's nothing, you should see how they drive on the eunuchs!

Best of Rodney Dill
The real tough guys waited for the cycle equipped for ice racing...

35 comments:

blue said...

don't worry, after I have had my fun, you can illegally immigrate to the USA & ObamaCare (TM) will give you new fingers for free!!!!

The Man said...

Where did you think McDonald's Chicken tenders come from?

The Man said...

"But how will we do jazz hands now?"

metalgarth said...

Pakistani Evel Kenivel: UR DOING IT RONG, BUT EVIL

metalgarth said...

Stunts in Bollywood action movies sure are cheesy

Double the U said...

Rumble strips... you're doing it wrong!

Army of Dad said...

Slumdog Childcare.

Army of Dad said...

The wheels on the bike go round and round....the fingers and the hands go snap snap snap, snap snap snap.

Submariner said...

Rasheed, Fashion Policeman; "Now do you see why it is unwise to wear plaid on a Holy day?"

Submariner said...

"OW!"
"Not a real Superman..."
"OW!"
"Not a real Superman..."
"OW!"
"Not a real Superman..."
"OW!"
"Not a real Superman..."

Unscrupulous said...

Indian Rubber Burn!

Unscrupulous said...

Most Americans favored the passage of the Indian (hand) Removal Act, though there was significant opposition.

Jack Reacher said...

"What if we promise not to speak out again at a town hall meeting?"

Jack Reacher said...

ORA: "Bloody sand? You're soaking in it!"

Unscrupulous said...

Facing a massive budget deficit, the children of Kolkata Hindu School for Slow Learners were told to lay on their bellies and pray for transportation back home.

Abhijeet laughed as he knew he could only fit 7 or maybe 8 kids on the back of his ride.

Unscrupulous said...

Is that a Handy Davidson?

Unscrupulous said...

Wow, even their streets are hand-crafted.

Submariner said...

How about I say "I'm Sari" and we call it even?

Submariner said...

Girl on left's thought bubble: "THAT will teach the little ba$tards to throw erasers in MY classroom."

Submariner said...

INDIAN UPRISING: UR DOIN IT RONG

mega said...

Obama turned the throttle slowly. "This takes care of the right-wing bloggers, but I still need that Fairness Doctrine to shut down the radio."

dadoctah said...

If I live to be a million, I will never understand Pakistani music videos.

Matt the K said...

"And for my encore, I will now ride a wheelie on your asses".

Matt the K said...

All agreed -- Sartheep was the best motorcyclist in his village, hands down.

Matt the K said...

And all this time, I always thought "street urchins" was just a figure of speech...

Matt the K said...

The Festival of Rama was not really considered over until the children's fingers were good and tandoried.

Matt the K said...

Punjabi Health Code #4362.38 clearly states that all employees must wash hands before dieing.

Matt the K said...

That's nothing, you should see how they drive on the eunuchs!

dub said...

Giving your boss the finger....UR DOIN IT RONG!

Rodney Dill said...

Wilbur Knievel only ever obtained a modicum of celebrity.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

AdCom2009 named this Most Accurate Scare Tactic by those opposed to assembly line socialized medicine: "Third world chiropractors are coming to an obamalama out-patient medical center near you!"
PS: A close second showed an insurance executive poking an IV directly into Uncle Sam's wallet while Sam lay dying in a crowded waiting room.

Rodney Dill said...

The real tough guys waited for the cycle equipped for ice racing...

Rodney Dill said...

There were just normal baiters, the masters were never ever caught.

Matt the K said...

Permission slips??! We don' need no steenking permission slips!

Matt the K said...

Okay boys, you can't ALL be surgeons in America. We shall let the fates decide...