Friday, July 17, 2009

Metal Darth from Metalgarth

Metalgarth

1. ♪ "There is only one river-r-r-r-r... there is only one sea-a-a-a-a" ♫

2. Computer imaging shows us what Michael Jackson would have looked like in 2012, had he lived.

3. ♪ "I blew up Alderaan... But I did not blow up Tatooine..." ♪

4. Dick Cheney was *thisclose* to shooting another bassist in the face.

5. Not surprisingly, Darth Vader's rendition of "Helter Skelter" got way more applause than the rap stylings of Jar-Jar Binks.

Best of Mr. Hankey
As George Lucas begins staging "Star Wars - The Musical", his friends and family start the process of having him committed.

Best of metalgarth
"Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of a Marshall Stack cranked to 10"

Best of metalgarth
ORA: Their third album 'Sith Sandwich' got a 2 word review.

Best of Matt the K
To think that this was the only cool part of the Christmas Special, and they cut it!

Best of metalgarth
What do you mean? "Some parts are killer, and some parts need a little work" *gaaaaaaaaaack* *thud*

Best of Matt the K
One benefit to Darth's respirator was that he could do killer Frampton solos without the squawkbox.

Best of Rodney Dill
"I find your lack of bass disturbing."

Best of Unscrupulous
My son turned ten just the other day
He said, "Thanks for the Deathstar, Dad, come on let's play
Can you teach me to kill", I said "Not today
I got a lot to do", he said, "That's ok"
And he walked away but his smile never dimmed
And said, "I'm gonna be like him, yeah
You know I'm gonna be like him"

Best of Chrees
Chewbacca, What A Wookie!

Best of Rodney Dill
"Those are not the Chords you were looking for..."

Best of Rodney Dill
Simon Cowell: "That was absolutely horrendous...AcKppbtdsafpgghh"

55 comments:

Mr. Hankey said...

As George Lucas begins staging "Star Wars - The Musical", his friends and family start the process of having him committed.

Red said...

Mr. Hankey: LOL!

metalgarth said...

Heard backstage:

"I am altering the record deal. Pray I don't alter it any further"

metalgarth said...

The latest sensation on "The Empire's got Talent"

metalgarth said...

"Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of a Marshall Stack cranked to 10"

metalgarth said...

ORA:

You really don't want to know what happens if any brown M&Ms are found backstage

metalgarth said...

There was only one guitarist in the galaxy with the balls to stand up to Axl Rose.

metalgarth said...

ORA:

Their third album 'Sith Sandwich' got a 2 word review.

Matt the K said...

"But this Tractor Beam goes to eleven."

Matt the K said...

"Helllooo Dagobah!!!"

Matt the K said...

Ultimate sellouts of the 70's George Lucas and Gene Simmons team up and THIS is the vile result.

Matt the K said...

To think that this was the only cool part of the Christmas Special, and they cut it!

metalgarth said...

No, you may not sit in with us on "Ice Cream Man". *gaaaaaaaack* *thud*

vw: plexual??????

GregMan said...

"Your lack of appreciation for my music disturbs me."

metalgarth said...

What do you mean? "Some parts are killer, and some parts need a little work" *gaaaaaaaaaack* *thud*

Viking04 said...

After shouting 'FREEBIRD!', Bubba Joe Bob suddenly turned purple and slumped in his seat.

Matt the K said...

Metaldarth's went great until his stage scenery was in danger of being trampled by Jawas.

Matt the K said...

...That would be Metaldarth's SET.

GregMan said...

Mick Jagger goes to great lengths to hide his age these days.

GregMan said...

Barry Manilow covers weren't really this band's genre.

Matt the K said...

No dammit-- I said a HAN Solo!!

Matt the K said...

One benefit to Darth's respirator was that he could do killer Frampton solos without the squawkbox.

Rodney Dill said...

"I have a knob setting that let's me do Kessel runs in 11 Parsecs."

Rodney Dill said...

Darth Hendrix

Rodney Dill said...

"I find your lack of bass disturbing."

Rodney Dill said...

"Uh... Mr. Vader I would like to request Space Odditity again during this set. I just love that song and... AArURBpioheac....

dadoctah said...

I've got a bad feeling about this.

metalgarth said...

What Vader does when he takes a personal day

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9-sEuFdvD8&feature=related

Rodney Dill said...

Coming soon to your local Ootini Bar.

Unscrupulous said...

My son turned ten just the other day
He said, "Thanks for the Deathstar, Dad, come on let's play
Can you teach me to kill", I said "Not today
I got a lot to do", he said, "That's ok"
And he walked away but his smile never dimmed
And said, "I'm gonna be like him, yeah
You know I'm gonna be like him"

Uchuck the Tuchuck said...

Who's the Dark Lord
with th' jammin' power chord?

Darth!

Can you dig it?

Who's the meanest muthaf--
*You shut your mouth!*
Just talkin' 'bout Darth

He's a complicated man
That noone understands like his woman....

Chrees said...

Chewbacca, What A Wookie!

Mr. Hankey said...

"I've been waiting for you, Mr. Samms, my old guitar teacher. We meet again at last. The circle is now complete. When I left you I was but the learner. Now I am the master."

Army of Dad said...

Smells like Sith Spirit.

Army of Dad said...

Not the first time he has hands around a neck.

Army of Dad said...

Darth Van Halen

Barco Sin Vela II said...

Sammy Hagar returns for his triumphant world tour!

Matt the K said...

Left-handed Darth Hendrix preferred using a Jawa pedal over a wah-wah pedal.

Matt the K said...

Darth Hendrix always ended his shows with "Vader Chile, (Slight Return of the Jedi)".

dadoctah said...

Back in the late 70s, Darth Osbourne would finish each set by biting the head off an Ewok.

wv: tenishu. Actually it looks more like a Thom McCann boot.

Whacko said...

Hell welcomes Michael Jackson.

Rodney Dill said...

"Elmore James got nothing on this, baby."

Rodney Dill said...

"What do you mean... The cantina band is not hiring?"

Submariner said...

♪ I gave the Emperor a cherry, that had no stone...♪

Submariner said...

♪ Elvira ♪
Oom-papa-oom-papa-oom-papa-mou-mou

Submariner said...

♪ I wanna Jedi with a slow hand...♪

Submariner said...

Whoa! Neil Diamond's really let himself go...

Submariner said...

No; there will be only ONE tenor.

Rodney Dill said...

"Those are not the Chords you were looking for..."

Rodney Dill said...

Klaatu Barada Staccato

dub said...

I didnt know Michelle Obama could play the guitar. Amazing!


wv: exancref, come on, that has more letters than last Thursdays girl had fat rolls.

Rodney Dill said...

The Empire Strikes Bach

Rodney Dill said...

All your bass are belong to us.

Rodney Dill said...

Simon Cowell: "That was absolutely horrendous...AcKppbtdsafpgghh"

sonicfrog said...

V, since we last spoke about you son taking up guitar - looks like he's gotten pretty damned good... and bad!