Friday, June 19, 2009

The What's In Your Wallet Olympics

Brender

1. Not to be too pedantic, but I didn't think the Spartans went into battle armed with big wooden dildos.

2. "Pull my Spatha?"

3. Joey was somewhat disappointed when he finally got to view Captain Oveur's DVD collection.

4. Sullivan wasn't impressed. "I've had bigger."

5. After Obama passed an executive order requiring critics of the Stimulus to battle each other to the death for his amusement, Chris Matthews dropped dead from what the coroner called, "a massive orgasm."

Best of Silhouette
"You will call me 'Trojan,' not 'sir.' It's a thing. I worked so hard on this hat."

Best of The Man
I'm starting to think some of the images coming out of Iran are fakes.

Best of mega
After the military's budget had been re-routed to ACORN, it did the best it could in the killing fields of Afghanistan.

Best of Chrees
"You may take away our lives, but you can't take away our Guinness!!"

Best of dadoctah
What would happen if the cast of "My Name Is Earl" met the cast of "Doctor Who"?

Best of Son Of The Godfather
In the Year of our Lord 1314, patriots of Scotland - starving and outnumbered - charged the fields of SkunkHead. They fought like warrior poets; they fought like Scotsmen, and won bragging rights at the next Dungeon and Dragons gathering.

Best of Submariner
"For the honour of smelly pirate hookerrrrrrrrs!"

Best of prince of leaves
The organizers of the event were inconsistent - while they mandated the Roman reenactors carry wooden swords to prevent injuries, they allowed the Viking reenactors to take PCP to provide "authenticity" to their berserker charges.

Best of prince of leaves
Tragic mayhem ensued when the Woodstock 40th Anniversary Celebration and the Battle of the Teutoberg Woods Reenactment Society inadvertently reserved the park at the same time.

Best of dub
What's in your wallet? With a sword like that, I'm hoping lube.

Best of Oiao
'Where adult rejected males who failed High School JROTC drill team go to belong; the Renaissance Faire.'

35 comments:

Silhouette said...

"You will call me 'Trojan,' not 'sir.' It's a thing. I worked so hard on this hat."

dub said...

Still Thurzday?

The Man said...

I'm starting to think some of the images coming out of Iran are fakes.

mega said...

After the military's budget had been re-routed to ACORN, it did the best it could in the killing fields of Afghanistan.

mega said...

"Letterman's apology was NOT enough!"
"I will kill you, wingnut!!"

Anonymous said...

Can't decide if this is from the age of enlightenment, or the dark ages. DUDE GET A TAN!

Chrees said...

"You may take away our lives, but you can't take away our Guinness!!"

Tremor said...

Sic semper bald-celtus

Army of Dad said...

The Roman Skunk legion quickly faded into history as their only real weapons were smelling bad and wooden swords.

wv: lubpro Yeah you would need a pro to lube that wooden rod.

Army of Dad said...

The Roman short stick was less effective than the short sword.

Army of Dad said...

If that were a modern Roman and German the Italian would have already crumpled to the ground and scream in pain to the referee.

Army of Dad said...

The battle between Skunkus and Bartag the Bald would have been the stuff of legends had anyone been smart enough to write it down.

The Man said...

The GWAR tryouts went better than expected

Jack Reacher said...

When American Express laid off its mascot, competition was fierce for the replacement.

dadoctah said...

What would happen if the cast of "My Name Is Earl" met the cast of "Doctor Who"?

Son Of The Godfather said...

In the Year of our Lord 1314, patriots of Scotland - starving and outnumbered - charged the fields of SkunkHead. They fought like warrior poets; they fought like Scotsmen, and won bragging rights at the next Dungeon and Dragons gathering.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"David Carradine did NOT die that way, lying scum!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

What happens at Renn Faire STAYS at Renn Faire.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"That man's nuts! Grab 'em!"

Kaptain Krude said...

"Highlander."
"Braveheart."
"Highlander!"
"Braveheart!"
"HIGHLANDER!"
"BRAVEHEART!"


wv: glazes - What the world's eyes do in the midst of this scintillating nerd-fest exchange.

That's weird. Spell Check questions Braveheart, but not nerd-fest.

Kaptain Krude said...

ORA:
Dead skunk on top of my head
Dead skunk on the top of my head
Dead skunk on top of my head
Stinkin' to high heaven.

Submariner said...

Picard.
Kirk.
Picard!
Kirk!
PICARD!
KIRK!

Submariner said...

"For the honour of smelly pirate hookerrrrrrrrs!"

prince of leaves said...

"Just like a Roman to bring a wooden stick to a sword fight..."

prince of leaves said...

The organizers of the event were inconsistent - while they mandated the Roman reenactors carry wooden swords to prevent injuries, they allowed the Viking reenactors to take PCP to provide "authenticity" to their berserker charges.

prince of leaves said...

"Gladiator!"
"13th Warrior!"
"Gladiator!"
"13th Warrior!"
"Gladiator!"
"13th Warrior!"
"GLADIATOR!"
"13TH WARRIOR!"

prince of leaves said...

Tragic mayhem ensued when the Woodstock 40th Anniversary Celebration and the Battle of the Teutoberg Woods Reenactment Society inadvertently reserved the park at the same time.

Viking04 said...

The Wolverine asked, "What is an Appalachian State Mountaineer?" Four quarters later, his question had been answered.

dadoctah said...

"This is *so* much cooler than last year when I dressed as Pikachu."

dub said...

What's in your wallet? With a sword like that, I'm hoping lube.

dub said...

The mental flashbacks of AOD from that one time, in college, when everyone was experimenting....

Mr. Hankey said...

...and it was all fun & games until somebody lost an eye.

Oiao said...

Why the Northern Caliornia Renaissance Faire is held at a place actually named 'Casa de Fruta.' Word!

Oiao said...

3d place winner at the Renaissance Faire; Category: 'Best use of road kill skunk pelt in costume design.'

You just do not want to see or smell the 1st or 2nd place winners!

Oiao said...

'Where adult rejected males who failed High School JROTC drill team go to belong; the Renaissance Faire.'