Friday, May 22, 2009
1. "Come, you spirits That tend on mortal thoughts! unsex me here, And fill me from the crown to the toe, top-full Of direst cruelty; make thick my blood, Stop up the access and passage to remorse, That no compunctious visitings of nature Shake my fell purpose, nor keep peace between The effect and it! Come to my woman's breasts, And take my milk for gall, you murdering ministers, Wherever in your sightless substances You wait on nature's mischief!"
2. Tragedy ensued when they wandered into the Plushy convention next door and were ripped to shreds by a guy in a mongoose costume.
3. "I will have my revenge on you, Dick Cheney! I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!"
4. Whatever this guy paid eHarmony to match him with his soul-mate, it still wasn't enough.
5. ORA: "Dammit, Roadblock, for the last time... I don't want a body massage!"
Best of Viking04
It was the only way Rahm could attend the convention, and it felt so 'right'.
Best of metalgarth
4' foot wooden snake rod. What's he overcompensating for?
Best of mpur
The dreadful day that C.O.B.R.A. joined forces with C.A.M.E.L.T.O.E.
Best of Silhouette
"Sorry about the lay-offs, everyone, but here are Fred and Helen from HR to tell you about your health insurance options."
Best of steve o
This week on Project Runway, contestant vie to create the uniforms for the elite U.N. Special Forces.
Best of Submariner
Those are UN Special Forces uniforms, Steve O? I thought they were French irregulars...
Best of prince of leaves
"What's the big deal? If the head of Mothers Against Drunk Driving can be a man, why can't a man be the leader of the Inflamed Vagina Militia?"
Best of Rich Bateman
Let me introduccccce you to the misssusss? Isss that a sssnake in your pocket?
Best of Army of Mom
Best of mega
Amina figured the niqab got her squared away with the Koran, which, she noted, didn't say anything about cameltoe.
Best of Mr. Hankey
Protesting in front of the White House, COBRA terrorists argue that GI Joe team members used excessive Kung-Fu Grip when interrogating prisoners. Obama is expected to soon declare that Kung-Fu Grip is torture and barbaric.