1. So far, his strategy of driving the innovative players out of business and producing inferior, bug-ridden copies of their hands was working well in the World Series of Poker.
2. "I've got four queens... but enough about the Microsoft marketing department."
3. "Too bad. You wagered your soul. See you in hell."
4. ORA: "You know the rules to 'Cripple Mr. Onion?' Dammit, Gates, you are the nerd to end all nerds."
5. "Magic, the Gathering. All you need is a brain, a deck, and a ... oh, crap!"
Best of GregMan
"I bet Steve Jobs that no one would notice that Windows was crap. What makes you think you can bluff me with a bare King showing?"
Best of mklasing
Upon realizing he was definitely going to win, Mr. Gates gave a nervous glance at the shotgun sitting next to Dick Cheney.
Best of metalgarth
WTF? Does the world really need another 'Revenge of the Nerds' movie?
Best of Submariner
Bill; "Square, Water, Star, Square... Golly, this isn't hard at all!"
Dick; "That's because the OTHER person normally looks at the card faces, Schmuck."
Best of Viking04
Bill Gates, secretly a Centauri spy, used his tentacle-like sexual organs to cheat at cards.
Best of Jay Guevara
"I've got 12 aces. What've you got?"
Best of Mr. Hankey
Holding his cards close to his chest, a coked-up Bill soon knew that he would be losing his underwear to Barney.
Best of dub
I'll call your "wide stance" and raise you....wait....what???
Best of jeff
"You realize what the odds of drawing to an inside straight are, right? I've calculated all of them."