Saturday, April 11, 2009

Un-Bearable


1. Brick Tamlin warned this would happen if they hired a woman.

2. Of all the ways for the world to end, giant bears is one not even Glenn Beck saw coming.

3. "Last time I saw a bear that big, he was shtupping Andrew Sullivan in a Fire Island bath house."

4. It started with window stickers of Fords urinating on Chevys, and only got worse from there.

5. "Hello, 9-11... There's a big giant huge scary thing attacking our dealership. It's wearing a dress that looks like an old couch and keeps calling us 'chalk-face whores.'"

Best of Submariner
Dropping him off at the airport for a trip to Hollywood, Fozzy's dad always had a hard time saying goodbye...

Best of Rodney Dill
After lunch he became known as a Bear-stain bear.

Best of mpur
The bear market was devastating on car dealerships.

Best of prince of leaves
After Nobel-winning geneticist Frank Thurmond joined their ranks, ecoterrorists were able to drastically increase the scale and irony of their attacks.

Best of prince of leaves
Denver public art ORA: "Help! Help! You gotta let me in! There's a bunch of emaciated aliens and a giant horse with laser eyes headed this way!"

Best of dadoctah
"Teddy Ruxpin II! This time, it's personal!"

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Capture those Kodiak moments on film...

Best of dub
The current market had grizzly effects on the auto industry.

Best of Kaptain Krude
"Buy a new truck? Why? I'm a bear, I don't NEED to compensate for anything!"

Best of Submariner
Cloverfield II ended up being even less satisfying than the original...

32 comments:

Submariner said...

His munchies left unsatisfied by the Eskimo Pie he got off the Good Humor bus, Nanooki went to town looking for a more filling snack...

Submariner said...

Giant bear flashers spotted at the Civic Center. Film at 11!

Submariner said...

ORA:

Muldoon laughed; "No, really; I'm after BIG game..."

Submariner said...

Looks like the Annual Camporee at Denali will have some interesting challenges for merit badges.

Submariner said...

Dropping him off at the airport for a trip to Hollywood, Fozzy's dad always had a hard time saying goodbye...

Matt the K said...

ONLY YOU can prevent
whack "Caption This" pics
like this, V the K.

Rodney Dill said...

After lunch he became known as a Bear-stain bear.

mpur said...

The bear market was devastating on car dealerships.

Mr. Hankey said...

Following Ranger Smith into town, Yogi realizes that he has moved past picnic baskets to Two-ton 4X4's.

prince of leaves said...

After Nobel-winning geneticist Frank Thurmond joined their ranks, ecoterrorists were able to drastically increase the scale and irony of their attacks.

prince of leaves said...

I CAN HAZ PICKUP?

prince of leaves said...

Unintended Consequence #9489831-4: Barack Obama's promise to stop the rising seas and heal the Earth was ultimately fulfilled, but with some terrible and wholly unforeseen side-effects.

prince of leaves said...

"Hi, Jim? I'm here to check your union vote card..."

prince of leaves said...

Denver public art ORA: "Help! Help! You gotta let me in! There's a bunch of emaciated aliens and a giant horse with laser eyes headed this way!"

dadoctah said...

"Teddy Ruxpin II! This time, it's personal!"

Son Of The Godfather said...

Just another day at the maul...

Son Of The Godfather said...

"OMG, it's a giant bear!... Just play dead!... Oh, it's a Ford... no problem."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Capture those Kodiak moments on film...

Son Of The Godfather said...

With the size of that thing, there will be absolutely no doubt left about what he does in the woods.

Arcticman Speaks! said...

"Oh no, they say he's got to go, go, go....BEARZILLA!"

Shayne said...

Boy, Rosie has really let herself go!

Submariner said...

Don't mind me - I'm just looking for my manpig...

dub said...

The current market had grizzly effects on the auto industry.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Ford Didn't Have A Better Idea
Setting: Emergency Meeting of Overpaid US Auto Execs
Glancing out the window, Ford Motor's Alan Mulally suddenly pounds the table and exclaims, "Congress is full of morons, right? Well, hell, just tell 'em a giant blue bear ate your plans for avoiding bankruptcy! Take a picture. You'll get billions!"

Kaptain Krude said...

"Excuse me, but have heard the good news about RON PAUL?"

Adriane said...

Dude, for the last time ... Nobody named Goldilocks works here!

Kaptain Krude said...

"Buy a new truck? Why? I'm a bear, I don't NEED to compensate for anything!"

Army of Dad said...

Happy fun bear wants a pick up truck too!

Army of Dad said...

Dare to bear.

Army of Dad said...

Stone Age Park, starring the giant short faced bear in place of a T-rex failed to capture the public's imagination.

Submariner said...

Cloverfield II ended up being even less satisfying than the original...

Mr. Hankey said...

King Pooh - Disney's attempt in terror movies brings a transformed Winnie The Pooh to New York City. As the beast follows Christopher Robin through town - mayhem and destruction follows. You'll laugh & cry.