Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Gee, They Both Seem to Be Having *Such* a Good Time
1. "No, Really, I'm not gay. I'm just really put off by the fact that you could land a Piper Cub in the space between your joybags."
2. "First of all, Maxine, there's a little thing called 'shrinkage.' Secondly, yes, compared to the guys behind me, I am going to suffer a little bit in comparison."
3. "I've always wondered what it would be like to have sex with a black guy." "Gee, Mike, so have I."
4. "So, dub, those five pounds I put on over the winter don't make you grimace in revulsion when you touch my back, do they?"
5. Dang it, if her boobs didn't point in opposite directions, she'd make a great vest for my 'woman suit.'
Best of Army of Dad
Janet's horrible back acne repulses another victim.
Best of Jack Reacher
"Here it is; I found the air valve."
Best of dub
Seriously, WHERE IS THE DAMNED HOLE?!?!?
Best of metalgarth
Darrin could never remember the proper sequence of 1's and 0's to get his femme-bot to feign interest in him
Best of Tim
"yup that's a leach"
Best of Jay Guevara
"Yeah. Like you've got a shot."
Best of jeff
"Good Grief Jan, recolor your hair - those black roots are disgusting!"
Best of prince of leaves
ORA: "Maaaatt Daaaaamon!!!"
Best of Kaptain Krude
"There there, Jenny darling, that V the K is a sick intercourse with no sense of decency. He presents himself as some sort of holier-than-thou do-gooder Christian, with pictures of tits and animals having sex on his blog. You are much too good to be his Thursday Babe. There there, let me massage that tension away." Bruce took his opportunity when he saw it.
Best of Mr. Hankey
Landry always heard that once you got a girl wet, you owned her.
Best of Matt the K
Ewww. First negroes at the pool and now I have to put lotion on a *girl*. Jacob the Gay Racist Mormon is having a terrible day.