Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Ugly, Ugly Bag of Mostly Water

Army of Mom

1. M'Chel Obama tried on this outfit and was immediately mistaken for an Ent.

2. Grimmis had a secret jones for Asian whores.

3. The ATHF's most feared villainess: Salad Bar.

4. Because Earth in 150,000 BC had no usable cotton, wool, or flax, Athena had to make do. Helo thought she looked ridiculous.

5. The creations of Sid and Marty Kroft were hunted almost to extinction to make this dress.

Best of Matt the K
Next time use Industrial-strength Lysol for those pesky Yoko Ono spores.

Best of metalgarth
"I don't know! What do you get when you cross a Thai hooker with a dishwashing spongue?"

Best of Maogwai
Tough times, for David Bowie's "China Girl".

Best of dadoctah
Chiung Yi got her superpowers when she was bitten by a radioactive artichoke.

Best of dub
Hey, sometimes you gotta artichoke a bitch.

Best of Rodney Dill
...made of 100% recycled condoms

Best of Army of Mom
Contraception sponge? You're wearing it.

Best of Army of Dad
Phlegm fabu!

Best of jj
After her blog failed, Amanda found new ways to repulse conservatives.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Obamalama picked Richard SImmons, lifelong friend and diet guru to head the US Army. The change to a vegetarian camouflage uniform was inevitable.

63 comments:

Matt the K said...

Next time use Industrial-strength Lysol for those pesky Yoko Ono spores.

Julie the Jarhead said...

This thing would make Karen Carpenter look fat.

(There -- I made a Karen Carpenter joke. But I still love her.)

wv: tiant -- Louie! Louie!

Silhouette said...

You look like a million bucks!

Green and wrinkly.

metalgarth said...

odds are 10 to 1 that she has a 'coexist' bumper sticker on her car

metalgarth said...

"I don't know! What do you get when you cross a Thai hooker with a dishwashing spongue?"

Maogwai said...

Tough times, for David Bowie's "China Girl".

England should not have turned Hong Kong over to the Reds.

dadoctah said...

Chiung Yi got her superpowers when she was bitten by a radioactive artichoke.

mklasing said...

Needless to say, "SpongeBob Squarepants: The Musical" totally sucks.

Seoulman (R) said...

I can haz flat squeaky toy

dub said...

Hey, sometimes you gotta artichoke a bitch.

Seoulman (R) said...

What a rip off! I saw the same design created by the homeless guy who lives downtown years ago.

dub said...

That outfit is ridiculous. I mean really now...purple tights?

Seoulman (R) said...

Don't laugh, can your dress stick to any surface?

dub said...

How nature says "She will hurt you long before tomorrows painful urination".

Seoulman (R) said...

Fashion designer thought: You know, women always complain dresses have no pockets, what if we made the dress into a pocket?

Seoulman (R) said...

Obama's next move included reducing methane emissions into the air by storing human gas.

Anonymous said...

Willie Wongka hit the wrong button and turned her into a giant durian.

Passionate Conservative said...

It's a livin loufa.

Pendark said...

Al Gore was just certain that his new line would renew the lost interest in global warming.

Matt the K said...

God only know whose pleasure this is ribbed for...

Matt the K said...

Grimace's mail-order bride.

Kaptain Krude said...

The fashion industry was amused at the First Lady(?)'s coronation dress, and decided to see just how much further they could take the joke.

mega said...

After the Fed printed another $40 trillion, many citizens reverted to wearing their wealth in seashells.

Adriane said...

Combine Noh and Anime !?! Well this is Japan, after all ...




wv: reneu - What didn't happen in Logan's Run.

Rodney Dill said...

Woman are fine,
sheep divine,
but hedgehogs are numero uno.

Rodney Dill said...

With plenty of room for carrying offspring. Hedgehogette prepares to give Platypussy a run for the money.

Rodney Dill said...

...made of 100% recycled condoms

GregMan said...

Thursdays weren't what they used to be after VtheK went "green".

GregMan said...

What a coincidence, I have that vegetable!

GregMan said...

The Jolly Green Giant's "youthful indescretion" came back to haunt him when he heard the fateful word, "Daddy!"

Army of Dad said...

That reminds me, I have been pining for some oriental food.

Army of Dad said...

Yet another flakey chick.

wv: fatessub
Subby, Fate has deemed her to be your prom date.

Army of Mom said...

'Ow to speak Australian: sushi.

Army of Mom said...

No, really stop laughing Geoffrey. I have got to pee. How do I get this thing off to pee?

Army of Mom said...

Contraception sponge? You're wearing it.

Army of Mom said...

She's a specialist in green-teabagging.

Army of Mom said...

Why you want to know? You play harmonica?

Army of Mom said...

What is really scary is what's underneath. She asked for a cap to cover her hair while she bathed. This is what the concierge gave her.

Army of Mom said...

You should really see a dermatologist about that scaly skin, hon.

Army of Dad said...

Phlegm fabu!

Army of Dad said...

Like a pine cone cowboy...

(The Japanese love karaoke, but karaoke doesn't always love them back)

Army of Dad said...

Algae seeing in the old familiar places

Army of Dad said...

Sprout, Spout let it all out, these are things I am talking about.

Army of Dad said...

It ain't easy being green.

Army of Dad said...

Spiny Shrew.

Army of Dad said...

Don't worry Koko, one day you will find that special piece of velcro and you will be with him forever.

Army of Dad said...

The very innovative PMS warning dress was a huge hit.

Rodney Dill said...

just one "...From the Valley of the Jolly Ho Ho HO..." and Don Imus was once again in trouble again.

jj said...

After her blog failed, Amanda found new ways to repulse conservatives.

Barco Sin Vela II said...

Aja was best for her part as a spore of pollen in the school play, "March Winds bring April Sneezes".

Mr. Hankey said...

The bride of Sigmund the Sea Monster.

mpur said...

The Veggie Tales live action play just didn't translate well.

Submariner said...

"The Attack Of The Horny Scrubbing Bubbles" was a crap-tastick effort, even by Ed Woods' standards...

mega said...

Hsu figured if she ignored the psoriasis outbreak, maybe everyone else would too.

mega said...

Michelle O's first choice of outfit for the Non-State of the Union speech was rejected for insufficient butt space.

mega said...

Kleagle Byrd enjoyed a good fashion show now and then.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

REALLY GOING GREEN
API Wash DC - By executive order, Obamalama proclaims National Wear-a-Chlorophyl-Shirt-to-Work Friday's. Each shirt should soak up the solar equivalent of 1 hearing aid battery. Worn once before recycling, they cost $4500, incl. the new Pelosi Debt tax. In unrelated news, unemployment figures suddenly shoot through roof.

-OR-

Obamalama picked Richard SImmons, lifelong friend and diet guru to head the US Army. The change to a vegetarian camouflage uniform was inevitable.

-OR-

Hair, not just "Down Under"
The Australian Surgeon General confirms rumors that the expanding hole in the ozone is causing full-time residents to evolve into brussel sprouts.

Submariner said...

Even after adding "ribbing for maximum pleasure," full-body condoms never quite caught on.

Dactyl said...

Army of Mom on laundry day.

Dactyl said...

Dub's dream girl? Only the gardener knows...

(wv: didye. Well, didye?)

Kaptain Krude said...

"I'm very efficient at retaining water!"

"I'm not surprised!"

Dactyl said...

Eliot Spitzer's Christmas tree.

James McEnanly said...

Dress, hat and purse, all in one.