1. Barney Frank's pages didn't understand why he didn't appreciate the gift. "What the heck is 'boo-dwar photography' anyway?'"
2. Sorry guys, you're a little late to the party on the "Boy Band" Craze.
3. "Billy-Bob, I'm almost sure a' enema t'ain't s'posed to go in yer ear."
4. "We shove this needle in, inject a neurocide kill off your higher cognitive functions, teach you to chant 'Hope and Change' and get ACORN register you to vote."
5. "Aw, c'mon, Billy, don't be selfish. Let us extract and consume your brain juice!"
Best of Jack Reacher
In an example of HopenChange Economics, the boys pooled their resources to buy a hood strut for a Chrysler 300, figuring it will be worth a fortune once Chrysler and its suppliers no longer exist.
Best of Army of Dad
My little plunger boy, a rump-pa-pum, damn he is dumb.
Best of Matt the K
And here we have a tintype photo of typical West Virginia children at the turn of the century. The 21st century, to be exact.
Best of Tim
Hogwart's rather simple beginings
Best of Silhouette
Three out of four urchins agree, closely cropped hair is the best lice preventative.
Best of Natalia
Young Barney Frank was pretty serious about holding on to his skin flute.
Best of dadoctah
"Let's try it again, and this time, MORE COWBELL!!!"
Best of Mr. Hankey
A Public Service Message from the office of Nancy Pelosi reminding you that these children were not necessary.