1. Desperate to reignite their former passion, Obama blows softly into Plugs's ear.
2. "OMG, it's so big. It must fifty trillion inches long." Math was never Plug's strong suit.
3. The other reason Joe Biden's nickname is "Plugs."
4. "Joe, it's okay. That word 'niggardly' doesn't mean what you apparently think it means."
5. "Joe, you is my woman, now, you is."
Best of Jack Reacher
"Um, Barack, that is not where da white women at."
Best of BOO
"Joe, Michelle just called. We're on for that threesome tonight."
Best of Matt the K
{guffaw}...Mongo straight!
Best of duke of red
"Pssst... Tell your daughter, if she needs more blow, look me up."
Best of Army of Dad
Joe: "Hey why not, he is clean, attractive and articulate!"
Best of Whacko
"Joe, I'm making everyone in America my biatch, starting with you."
Best of molson
Unlike the American taxpayer, Joe gets a little kiss before taking another one for the team.
Best of steve o
...but the guy who messed around with the teleprompter script was fired.
And then secretly rehired.
64 comments:
In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight...
"Plagiarize this, big boy."
"Check out my Barry White impression."
...blah blah stimulus package blah blah...
"Um, Barack, that is not where da white women at."
The Heimlich maneuver successfully completed, both men stared down at what they later described as "like Ann Coulter, only a lot wetter".
"Joe, don't mind my hand in your, um, pocket. Just looking for some, um, auh, change in your big boy."
"Joe, Michelle just called. We're on for that threesome tonight."
Welcome to the Darkside of the TOTUS
{guffaw}...Mongo straight!
"I'ma make you my prison bitch."
&
"Squeal like a peeyugg, bhoyyy."
"Mr. President, I do NOT have the 'worst @$$ since Herbert Hoover'".
"Pssst... Tell your daughter, if she needs more blow, look me up."
"That's right, Joe. When I send you over to North Korea, I'm gonna introduce Jill to my black snake. ... Who's not ready to be president NOW, b!Tch?"
Carl asks Principal Skinner to help 'straighten out his Longfellow' since Lenny was out of town for the weekend
Not even the courtesy of a reach-around.
I wish I could quit you
Spend me tender, spend me true...
Joe: "Hey why not, he is clean, attractive and articulate!"
Joe: "brown sugar, how come you taste so good..."
I don't know nothing about birthing no economy!
Mr. President, you are going to have to keep at least six inches of space between you and your dance partner.
I guess we know where BO and JOe like to make whoopie.
ORA: Dat itd be da butt, bob!
BO: "How did you like the horse head? Don't even think about fucking with me about my birth certificate ever again."
Don't worry Joe, you will get used to dirty politics-Chicago style!
When I think about you I touch Joe Biden.
ORA(prarphrase): "Hey Michele, I'm fucking Joe Biden"
"Hey Joe, I think that is a Greek flag so doesn't that mean we have to do it Greek style?"
"How do you like Air Force One?"
"Joe, you always stimulate my package."
"Bitch!?!-- Is that Obsession?! Now we both know damn well you wear Axe!! Who is he?!!!!"
Having already picked the hairs off of the heads of reporters in the front row - Obama begins grooming Joe's ears.
Some days you just can't get that monkey off your back.
"Love to love you, baby..."
"I bet you say that to all the Democrat apparatchiks."
"No, no, baby, I really mean it."
I CAN HAZ REACHAROUND
Gimme some sugar, baby!
Yep, he's the Army of Darkness alright.
Now, cough Joe.
You've got nothing if you don't have your health. What? This isn't prostate self-exam month? Oh, my bad.
Joe, is that a lobbyist in your pocket or are you happy to see me?
Shhh. We've replaced BO's concubine with Joe Biden. Lets see if he notices.
ALL UR STIMULUS BELONG TO ME
Joe; "15 schnitzengrubens is my limit, baby..."
Joe; "OH! It's twue. It's twue!"
BO whispering; "SAD moment, dipshit. No smiles. Think of your retirement fund, your children marrying one of us, the Republicans winning in 12, working for Hillary instead of me..."
BO: "I want rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists."
Joe: [finding pen and paper] "Could you repeat that, sir?"
Ooooh, Joe, that's a bigun! Don't forget to start your 4-hour timer... and keep that thing away from the paparazzi.
"Where will you be when the viagra kicks in?"
♪My hands in your pocket, I'm stuck up your tush.♪
♪Your hands on your hips, give me a push.♪
♪You'll be surprised, you're being done by the American Mistake.♪
Voila!
Joe's thought bubble; "C'mon laxative - KICK IN!"
Whistle while you work(at destroying America, her economy and all she stands for).
But Barak, all I wanted was a shrubbery...
"Don't fret Joe. Nothing to worry about. These are our friends...the national media."
"Joe, I'm making everyone in America my biatch, starting with you."
Whispers: I swear to god Biden, one word about the whole taxation in 2011 thing and I'll rip your f****** nuts off...you hear me?
If you know what's good for you, you'll keep your mouth shut about the party last night.
Since we're on a Blazing Saddles bender:
"One false move and the nigger gets it."
The joint Stevie Wonder-Paul McCartney impression on "Ebony and Ivory" was the hit of karaoke night. Then they had to go and spoil it with their encore of "The Girl Is Mine".
Biden: That's not how I got the nickname Plugs...
"Mr. Soros wants you in his office - NOW."
Unlike the American taxpayer, Joe gets a little kiss before taking another one for the team.
...but the guy who messed around with the teleprompter script was fired.
And then secretly rehired.
Another Obama Presidential first.
Anyone trying this with Cheney would probably catch a face full of bird-shot.
ORA: "Well, did you jump?"
"A little at first, but you get used to it."
Is you my baby or is you ain't?
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