1. Elmo has disappointed Lord Vader for the last time.
2. "Mary's child should enjoy this plush toy."
3. No one ever mentioned Lord Vader's charitable work, like his commitment to the Life Day "Toys for Younglings" campaign.
4. In a more Hollywood ending, Padme survived childbirth but divorced Darth Vader, who was granted bi-weekly visitation to the twins.
5. Lord Vader's other favorite charity: Hyperthyroidal Irish wookie orphans.
Best of GregMan
"Your lack of batteries disturbs me."
Best of Army of Dad
Do you have another target, a military target or will I have to have the Deathstar fire on Seasame Street!?
Best of Army of Dad
You may strike me down, but I will become more cute than you can ever imagine.
Best of metalgarth
Vader finally gets his revenge on the writers of the "Star Wars Holiday Special"
Best of metalgarth
Good bounty hunters were hard to find in the Henson System
Matt the K
"Where da *white* Elmos at??"
Best of Jack Reacher
"Torture!" shrieked Amnesty
"Get Elmo a lawyer!" demanded the ACLU.
"We're closing Toys R Us to help repair our image abroad," said Obama.
Best of Mr. Right
"You are unwise to lower your defenses. Prepare to be tickled as never before!"
Best of Mr. Right
"Grover has taught you well, but you do not know the power of the Dark Side! Evil Bert will show you the true nature of The Force, he is your Master now!"
Best of Adjustah
"But Elmo intercepted no transmissions!"
Best of Army of Mom
The giggles are strong with this one.
Best of Rodney Dill
I find your lack of plush disturbing.
Best of Jack Reacher
ORA: "What's the frequency, Kenneth???"
Best of steve o
After failing to get the Princess to talk, Vadar works on getting back his confidence.
Best of steve o
Though they severely reduced the Elmos numbers in the war, the Empire was never able to wipe them out completely.
56 comments:
Geez, even the Elmo's are fat on this site.
"Yes, Elmo: I... am your father."
"I must be gettin' old", thought Lord Vader, "now I actually have to choke 'em with my HANDS!"
"W-w-we are not the --ecch-- m-muppets you are looking for."
"Your lack of batteries disturbs me."
Yet another metaphor for the democrat congress choking the life out of the American economy.
I see Michelle Obama is buying toys for the first daughters again.
Oh yeah, well tickle this Vader!
When Vader's force tickle proved ineffective he witched to the force choke.
Do you have another target, a military target or will I have to have the Deathstar fire on Seasame Street!?
You are a rebel spy and a traitor, take him away!
This choking is brought to you by the letter "V" and the number 1.
You may strike me down, but I will become more cute than you can ever imagine.
"No Lord Vader, that's not a misshapen Death Star under construction, that's Rosie O'Donnel."
"Where da *white* Elmos at??"
Vader finally gets his revenge on the writers of the "Star Wars Holiday Special"
vw: redgi
Vader didn't understand his master's warning until it was too late: "Elmos are exactly like Tribbles"
Good bounty hunters were hard to find in the Henson System
Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?
Matt the K said...
"Where da *white* Elmos at??"
That's funny stuff right there!
Elmoyoda: Size matters not. Judge me by my size, do you?"
We'll always have Mustafar...
Chinese knock-offs of popular toys, featuring high lead content, required certain adjustments at play-time.
Al Gore--in costume--lectures one of the few subjects who will sit still for one of his apocalyptic harangues.
So, do you think adjustment to life outside of government will be difficult for Dick Cheney?
Yeah, me too.
"Torture!" shrieked Amnesty
"Get Elmo a lawyer!" demanded the ACLU.
"We're closing Toys R Us to help repair our image abroad," said Obama.
"The Force is with you, Young Elmo... but you are not a Muppet yet!"
"You are unwise to lower your defenses. Prepare to be tickled as never before!"
"Grover has taught you well, but you do not know the power of the Dark Side! Evil Bert will show you the true nature of The Force, he is your Master now!"
"But Elmo intercepted no transmissions!"
ORA: "What's the frequency, Kenneth???"
Tickle me, you will.
Shut him up or shut him down!
Elmo says the chances of survival are 775 to 1.
The giggles are strong with this one.
I warn you not to underestimate my giggle powers.
Help me, Tickle Me Elmo. You're my only hope.
Early character design for the Ewoks had to be scrapped following threat of lawsuits.
"At last, the Dark Side has a resource to compete with Jar Jar Binks!"
The schwartz is strong with this one...
"I'm asking you for the last time, have you paid all of your federal taxes?"
The new Obama administration vetting process.
I find your lack of plush disturbing.
While Vader choked the original Elmo, the Elmo Clone TK-421, took a long loving look at Vader's junk.
"Do not turn my dark suit volume knob up to 11."
A market is established for the previously failed Bugger Me Elmos.
ORA: "What's the frequency, Kenneth???"
Excellent one Jack
With his Death Star destroyed, Lord Vadar takes a weekend job at Walmart.
After failing to get the Princess to talk, Vadar works on getting back his confidence.
Though the severely reduced their numbers in the war, the Empire was never able to wipe out the Elmos completely.
Though they severely reduced the Elmos numbers in the war, the Empire was never able to wipe them out completely.
Chad Vader was chastised for attaching bags of two marbles to the Elmos -- "No Chad, you're supposed to give each one two test tickles."
Toss in Dora the Explorer and something with Hannah Montana on it, and you've got cross-marketing gold.
So THAT's why his eyes are all popped out.
You're one ugly motherf*****
Early version of the Wookie species did not test as particularly menacing with target audiences...
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