Monday, December 22, 2008

Smokin' Claus



1. There's nothing the president-elect enjoys more than a traditional Voodoo Christmas and a stocking stuffed with Maui Wowie.

2. A few puffs later and the Minnesota Canvassing Board discovered "80 Million Kajillion votes" for Al Franken.

3. After Grandma converted to Santeria, Christmas just wasn't the same.

4. And out of the Democrat's Christmas Caucus emerged a one hundred billion dollar bailout for the Doritos, Mallomar, and shiny things industries.

5. Christmas in the Teacher's Lounge.

Best of The Man
This could explain the half-eaten twinkie in my stocking last Christmas

Best of Matt the Kostume
Santana Claus

Best of Tim
Early Dr. Who was not know for it's expensive special effects.

Best of flyovercountry
Visiting Santa in the Head Shop was just not any fun for the youngsters.

Best of Submariner
Note the evidence of the smoldering about to ignite? This is the last known picture of Dawn, approximately 6.5 seconds before the final cranial eruption.

Best of Jack Reacher
"Don't mind me, I'm just taking a flight without the reindeer tonight."

Best of dadoctah
I think we have our answer. Andy Williams has finally lost it.

Best of molson
Rudolf with your nose so bright will you guide my sleigh through this ganja haze tonight?

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Once Eric left for college and Kitty was in detox, Red Foreman and Leo had to celebrate the holidays alone in the basement... toking and mentally undressing Jackie.

Best of Chrees
A Clinton Christmas. George Clinton that is.

33 comments:

The Man said...

Unfortunately for Donner and Prancer, Stoner Santa got the munchies for some reindeer burgers.

The Man said...

This could explain the half-eaten twinkie in my stocking last Christmas

Matt the Kostume said...

Santana Claus

Kaptain Krude said...

Dude, you totally need to lay off of the chili con carne.

Kaptain Krude said...

Holy...! It's Scuba Clause!

Tim said...

The family was able to hide the fact that grandfather had died and even managed to make a little in donations, at least for a the first few days.

Tim said...

"Killer Hobo's from New Jersey" eventually became a cult sensation how ever struggled in it's early film release.

Tim said...

early Dr. Who was not know for it's expensive special effects.

Tim said...

In Peru, Santa was a representation of dead ancestors, gifts of Coors light were thought to guarantee luck in the new year

Tim said...

Christmas party at NAMBLA!!!

Silhouette said...

Ho Ho Hobo

flyovercountry said...

Visiting Santa in the Head Shop was just not any fun for the youngsters.

molson said...

Santana Claus likes his cookies and spleefs.

dadoctah said...

"I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle! And I don't fucking care if I shoot my eye out!"

Submariner said...

Granpda got plowed under by some ganja...

Submariner said...

Dub has this outfit...
(so's he can get all the little-boy-shaped girlies to sit on his lap.)

Submariner said...

Note the evidence of the smoldering about to ignite? This is the last known picture of Dawn, approximately 6.5 seconds before the final cranial eruption.

Submariner said...

Seriously dude; what happens in twins' rooms STAYS in the twins' rooms...

Submariner said...

I found this photograph of 1 st Lt. G. W. Bush, circa 1970, while he was supposedly on maneuvers.

/s/ Dan Rather

prince of leaves said...

The startling truth behind the practice of leaving out cookies for Santa on Christmas Eve: munchies.

Jack Reacher said...

"Don't mind me, I'm just taking a flight without the reindeer tonight."

Jack Reacher said...

Which Senate seat is he vying for, Illinois or New York?

mandible claw said...

Santa still held onto the belief that Obama's middle-class tax cut was real, and continued to search through areas where it might have been misplaced

mandible claw said...

"Ho ho ho .. Ho ho ho ho ho ho .. ho ho ho ho ho ho ho .. Wait, what were we talking about again?"






(post directly above this was meant for the thread below, sorry)

Submariner said...

"I can visit every home on earth in one night?"
Gaia! Was I ever baked when I dreamed up THAT one!?!

Submariner said...

Cool sittings, mon.

dadoctah said...

I think we have our answer. Andy Williams has finally lost it.

prince of leaves said...

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
Now, Ganja! now Baja!
Now, M-J! and Mauie!
On, Spliff ! On Stash! On, Stoner and Munchies!

molson said...

Rudolf with your nose so bright will you guide my sleigh through this ganja haze tonight?

molson said...

With Santa more baked than the cookies he was ramming in his pie hole, it was obvious Christmas would have to be put on hold. Ganja accomplished what the Grinch could not.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Once Eric left for college and Kitty was in detox, Red Foreman and Leo had to celebrate the holidays alone in the basement... toking and mentally undressing Jackie.

WordVerify: ancesto - all that's left of the dead after a headhunter reunion dinner.

Chrees said...

A Clinton Christmas. George Clinton that is.

Submariner said...

Dammit, Al; quit smokin the magical votes we're findin' for you...