Monday, December 29, 2008

Shriners

Brender

1. "Oh, Holy and Blessed St. Burt Reynolds, please accept this offering of Orange Julius from thy humble servant."

2. The Cult of the Inflatable Rubber Cowboy grows daily.

3. Rod Blagojevich only wishes his hair looked that realistic.

4. The FTD Inflatable Rubber Cowboy bouquet was a huge hit on Castro Street.

5. On Folsom Street, instead of riding a pony for a quarter, you can take a moustache ride for a quarter.

Best of Paul
Not surprisingly, the Burt Reynolds doll can act better than the real thing.

Best of Jack Reacher
It's just a mannequin, a clothes-horse, it's never accomplished anything.
So, yeah, it can be a New York Senator.

Best of Kaptain Krude
"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu Hollywood wgah'nagl fhtagn."

Best of Matt the Kostume
You will do it, Pablo, for thy god Wayne Newton commandeth you to do it.

Best of conservativeteen
Juan wondered how splashing hot wax on his face would stop the cologyian attack fleet from devestating earth, but he knew better then to question the bust.

Best of Submariner
I know it's "the richest kind," but the spigot Juan Valdez uses to dispense his brew still wierds me out...

26 comments:

Paul said...

Not surprisingly, the Burt Reynolds doll can act better than the real thing.

Whacko said...

Meanwhile in Minnesota, another vote is "found" for Al Franken.

Jack Reacher said...

"That's a nice suit. What is it, rich, Corinthian leather?"

Jack Reacher said...

It's just a mannequin, a clothes-horse, it's never accomplished anything.
So, yeah, it can be a New York Senator.

Submariner said...

Jack Reacher said...
It's just a mannequin, a clothes-horse, it's never accomplished anything.
So, yeah, it can be a New York Senator.


While it has never ACCOMPLISHED anything, being a display rack for clothing is at least somewhat useful. I think that makes it overqualified, JR...

flyovercountry said...

In a strange New Year's custom, a South American prays to the Bandit God to keep Smokey away, and to deliver a (much younger) Sally Field under the tree.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu Hollywood wgah'nagl fhtagn."

Matt the Kostume said...

You will do it, Pablo, for thy god Wayne Newton commandeth you to do it.

Matt the Kostume said...

Finally rid of that stupid burro, Juan Valdez was able to start his own cult. First rule-- No More F'ing Coffee!!!

Two Dogs said...

When Sergey finally realized his dream of meeting his hero, John Holmes, his adulation was lost.

Submariner said...

Claw machines in the lobby of the Mazatlan Shoney's are stocked a bit differently than they are in America, aren't they?

Submariner said...

"For your full blessing, put in another 50 pesos."
WTF?!?

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

Whoa! Algore has really livened up since the 2000 beat-down, but when did he grow the 'stache?

Passionate Conservative said...

Harry Reems looks a lot better since the taxidermist got done with him.

Kaptain Krude said...

"And please, O Great John Holmes, please allow V to find a Thursday Babe that dub doesn't find fat."

Kaptain Krude said...

"I ask for a big bust and a little head on Thursdays, and that sick intercourse gives me this!"

Submariner said...

Castro District's favorite arcade game - Kneel and Bob.

robert said...

Jesus, please accept this offering and bless my latest narco-deal.
* Not making this up: http://blog.vdare.com/archives/2007/12/16/mexican-beer-diversity-gets-saintly/

dadoctah said...

Are we absolutely sure they caught the real Saddam?

conservativeteen said...

Juan wondered how splashing hot wax on his face would stop the cologyian attack fleet from devestating earth, but he knew better then to question the bust.

Submariner said...

Apparently, Higgins decided it was Thomas' 'stache that brought in the ladies...

Submariner said...

ORA:

I dunno, I just kinda think a shrine to Randy Jones is a bit over the top, even in Frisco...

dub said...

AOD's shrine for his wife would have been better if she had remembered to wax her moustache before the replica was made.

Submariner said...

I know it's "the richest kind," but the spigot Juan Valdez uses to dispense his brew still wierds me out...

Passionate Conservative said...

So, THAT'S what happened to the Cowboy from the Village People!