1. "Keep them comin' until you look hot," dub ordered. He died of alcohol poisoning later that same night.
2. "This should hide the taste of the strychnine." Holding the first (and last) Cap This Meet-Up at Dawn's Bar proved to be a mistake.
3. Cheers 2009: A senile Diane mixes a highball with Parmesan cheese, a tennis ball, and a broken chair leg.
4. A member of Teh Resistance. Ridding the world of Obama-yuppies: One rat poison mojito at a time.
5. This is what happens when an inexperienced, unqualified candidate becomes a Starbucks barrista. Now, imagine what happens when you elect one president.
ROFLMAO Best of Matt Kostume
In a fit of jealous rage, Kermit's jilted lover crushes and drowns their offspring.
Wicked Best of Matt Kostume
The crime lab on "CSI: Dublin".
Best of Jack Reacher
"I call this drink The Bailout. You don't know what's in it, everyone encourages you to drink it anyway, and you'll pay for it for a long, long time."
Best of metalgarth
"Tennis ball shoved up my ass?" They sure have some weird names for drinks here. It was Suzi's first and last day Robert Maplethorp's Bar 'n Grill
Best of racerboy
Moments later Jane realized that customers were going to have to settle for ordinary muddled mojitos, as she discovered that the batteries in her "stirrer" were all used up from her "coffee" break...
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"Here, this'll cure your hangover... though you may wake up either wearing fake titties and f-ing your cat, or trying to communicate with sentient bananas or soccer pandas."
Best of dub
Waitress, there's an anal probe in my drink.
Best of prince of leaves
The other bartenders frequently teased her about her unmarketable "Art Criticism" degree, but when they hung the copy of 'Dogs Playing Poker' at the end of the bar to taunt her, something inside Luna snapped.
Best of prince of leaves
While crushing some phenobarbital into her drink at the end of a very long work day, bartender Jill inadvertently invents the Mojito and Pestle.
Best of Seoulman (R)
It's called a hope and change, it looks sweet but has a biting aftertaste that will leave you begging for socialized medicine.
Best of mpur
I'll have a crushed soylent green, straight up, please.
Best of mega
Having made their point with the Mormons, the anti-Prop8 crowd took their leftover anthrax to the black community.
43 comments:
ORA: "I don't think a mojito is a gay drink. Mojito."
"Here's your hangover cure."
"I drink that?"
"No, you realize that you slept with me last night. Side benefit; you'll never drink again."
Dawn's attempts to create a vegetarian meatloaf met with limited success.
"I call this drink The Bailout. You don't know what's in it, everyone encourages you to drink it anyway, and you'll pay for it for a long, long time."
In a fit of jealous rage, Kermit's jilted lover crushes and drowns their offspring.
"No, V., I'm fine with not being a Thursday Babe. Lemme just fix you a drink." muttering to self: I got your stinger right here, you sick intercourse.
Wanda demonstrates that with enough sugar, even crushed garter snake tastes good.
Suzette carefully mixes more hair dye.
"Tennis ball shoved up my ass?" They sure have some weird names for drinks here. It was Suzi's first and last day Robert Maplethorp's Bar 'n Grill
"I call my creation Irish Tennis Bomb".
The crime lab on "CSI: Dublin".
Moments later Jane realized that customers were going to have to settle for ordinary muddled mojitos, as she discovered that the batteries in her "stirrer" were all used up from her "coffee" break...
ORA: "It's.... green, sir!"
"Jeeeez, all I asked was if the carpet matched the drapes... You can stop f-ing with my gin and tonic now."
V, your caps made me LOL... Especially Cheers 2009. ;)
Cartman: "This disease is called "Gingervitis". Kids who have Gingervitis cannot be cured."
"On second thought, I'm not all that curious to taste a mint julip..."
"Here, this'll cure your hangover... though you may wake up either wearing fake titties and f-ing your cat, or trying to communicate with sentient bananas or soccer pandas."
"McCain supporter?... Yeah, we see a lot of you guys in here. Drink this, and it will blank your memory of the entire campaign... and the next four years."
Veronica continued her quest for the perfect Pan-Galactic GargleBlaster.
Maureen Dowd uses sugar as a substitute for eye-of-newt.
Waitress, there's an anal probe in my drink.
Ginger prepares a dirt nap cocktail for the meddling Lovey.
And all these years, you thought the Castaways were ghey??? No. It was Ginger, who secretly put saltpeter in their drinks.
Reba ruins a perfectly good country song by not pourin' a beer.
Who knew the "hair of the dog" was red??
The other bartenders frequently teased her about her unmarketable "Art Criticism" degree, but when they hung the copy of 'Dogs Playing Poker' at the end of the bar to taunt her, something inside Luna snapped.
After the massive dismantling of federal regulatory bodies that followed the anarcho-capitalist backlash in the elections of 2012, bars and pharmacies merged into one-stop full-service self-medication boutiques.
While crushing some phenobarbital into her drink at the end of a very long work day, bartender Jill inadvertently invents the Mojito and Pestle.
The Do-It-Yourself Diabetes Kit was a instant "can't keep it on the shelf" Christmas gift.
With a large dash of white pepper you can turn your mojito into a more-heat-o, and that's a good thing.
"We've secretly replaced the white granulated sugar with insecticide, let's see if anyone notices.
It's called a hope and change, it looks sweet but has a biting aftertaste that will leave you begging for socialized medicine.
With every satisfying thud against the glass, Sandy thought to herself "well, I guess it beats beating Obamatrons." How wrong she was.
A spoonful of sugar may make the medicine go down, but Wendy's secret ingredient of tabasco brought it right back up again.
"Sure thing, Mr. Hitler. It's my best drink - TO THE EXTREME!"
wv: jechingr - the noise you'll be making after pounding one of these home. (The drink, or the redhead? You decide)
Sugar water? Yep... we gotta bug.
I strongly recommend avoiding the Jonestown bars on Jim Jones Day.
I'll have a crushed soylent green, straight up, please.
People pay $10 for something I got sent to my room for trying to do to frogs when I was six. What a country!
Having made their point with the Mormons, the anti-Prop8 crowd took their leftover anthrax to the black community.
We muddle, we're in their thoughts and in their heads and we haven't the right.
Looks like she has handled some wood in her time.
It was time to make Eric pay for that "Ginger Retard" comment he made back in 4th grade
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