Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Ah don wan be ur doggeh neethur

Metalgarth
1. "I swear to Beelzebub, dog, if you ask me one more time when Chinese Democracy is coming out..."

2. Looks like Slash has been hearing "Welcome to the Buffet" more often than "Welcome to the Jungle."

3. ORA: "Damn you... and such."

4. All of Cher's plastic surgery suddenly snapped back right in the middle of Dr. Phil.

5. "Dog, you're gonna have to move your head. The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show just started, and Heidi Klum is wearing the leather outfit from last Friday."

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Ever since his marriage to Beth O, Stern's let himself go.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Hank's frustration grew when he discovered Rex didn't actually care for peanut butter.

Best of molson
Just me and my bitch kicking it on a Saturday night.

Best of Luna
Shortly after this picture was taken, I went searching for Kryptonite chew toys to end the humiliation once and for all

Best of Army of Mom
Worst.Wax.Museum.Ever.
That doesn't even look like Abe Lincoln. Or Rin Tin Tin.

Best of MattKostume
Reminds me of the movie...The Ramone That Ate The Other Ramones.

Best of Kevin Walker
Under Chairman O's reign, "Thursday Babes" have been replaced with "Tuesday Bestiality".

Best of mega
"He's spoiled, shits all over everyone, has a bad temper, and keeps getting into fights with the people who feed him. I named him Axel."

Best of MattKostume
Evil Slash had the cruel practice of posing with each of his boa's meals.

41 comments:

Jack Reacher said...

A former U.S. attorney, fired by the Bush administration, waits for a phone call from The One.

Jack Reacher said...

After his loss to Al Franken in the bitterly contested Minnesota Senate race, Norm Coleman withdrew to his St. Paul apartment with his dog, named ACORN.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Awesome rock name #102: "Fat Slash"

Son Of The Godfather said...

Ever since his marriage to Beth O, Stern's let himself go.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Jolly Joey Ramone

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Chuck, if you're really serious about losing weight, bowling with your Wii ain't gonna cut it."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Hank's frustration grew when he discovered Rex didn't actually care for peanut butter.

flyovercountry said...

Ever since his wife got the gig with "America's got Talent", Ozzie just sat at home and got high with his dog.

molson said...

Just me and my bitch kicking it on a Saturday night.

metalgarth said...

Just another quiet evening at the metalgarth household. Great... now everyone knows what a fat intercourse I am.

1)That is a Halloween picture of me and my dog, Luna, snapped by my wife who was dressed up as Ralphie from a Christmas story in a "pink nightmare" costume. I figured it would be criminal not to share this picture with V the K and the rest of the monors.

2) More pictures of Luna can be found at moondoggery.blogspot.com (name blatently stolen from Van Helsing)

3) Duly noted... I need to stop letting myself go ;)

Luna said...

Shortly after this picture was taken, I went searching for Kryptonite chew toys to end the humiliation once and for all

Son Of The Godfather said...

How to make people look like assholes - Tip132:
Post a picture for caption savagery, and don't tell anyone it's of another captioner.

Metalgarth - I'm guessing quite o few of us who sit around thinking up retarded captions all day have a similar frame build, if ya know what I mean. ;)

PS: VW = "mantingr"... I won't ask.

Army of Mom said...

Worst.Wax.Museum.Ever.

That doesn't even look like Abe Lincoln. Or Rin Tin Tin.

Army of Mom said...

Dear Penthouse Letters:

I never thought it would happen to me, but after my last Guns N Roses gig, I met the hottest bitch who was laying in my lap in an instant ...

Army of Mom said...

Lisa Bonet should really lay off the skin bleach. And, maybe give Jenny Craig a try.

Army of Mom said...

It was soap poisoning.

Army of Mom said...

Welcome to my living room
We've got hats 'n' shades
We got a remote control
And a costume thats real lame
We are lonely people
Theres a lot we need
If you got the webcam honey
We'll catch your disease

In the living room, welcome to my living room,
Watch it bring you to your shun n,n,n,n,,n,n,,n,n,n,,n,n,,n knees, knees
Do you need the eye bleach?

metalgarth said...

"dear penthouse letters,

I was slammed 5 times by Army of Mom. I know that's not the same as giving her the slam 5 times, but it's a start"

Dwight said...

"ya ya. U need moar cowbell. I wunt my balz back. Deal."

MattKostume said...

Welcome to the Retirement Jungle

MattKostume said...

SuperPup's shock-collar sealed him to his fate. He knew that lifting his head off from Slash Sr.'s "serpentine" meant a finger click trip to Zapsville.

MattKostume said...

Reminds me of the movie...The Ramone That Ate The Other Ramones.

MattKostume said...

Cockblocked yet AGAIN, Mick Mars settles for puppy seconds.

Submariner said...

Son Of The Godfather said...
Hank's frustration grew when he discovered Rex didn't actually care for peanut butter.


eeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Awesome.


v word - prombobl - prom bauble?

Submariner said...

Whoa - Axel Rose really let himself go, but he got a nice super-dude costume...


v word - bezinful - now these thing's are just gettin freaky, V.

Chrees said...

Guitar Hero III (alpha version)

MattKostume said...

Well, well, well. Cousin Itt finally shaves.

Chrees said...

Groupies... they ain't like they used to be...

MattKostume said...

At Halloween time, the Osbourne's dog can never know just *which* Osbourne she is snuggling with.

Army of Mom said...

Metalgarth - I love ya' man. It is actually a pretty funny costume. I'll have to find the picture of the year that I went as Fidel Castro and Army of Dad was Elian Gonzales. That would make us even. I even had a cigar (no comments from the peanut gallery!)

Silhouette said...

If this is metalgarth, who is going to fess up to being the guy posted below?

Kevin Walker said...

Under Chairman O's reign, "Thursday Babes" have been replaced with "Tuesday Bestiality".

MattKostume said...

After tappin' mckagan the kitchen, Axel rose to ask of the dog: "Izzy stradlin Slash's snakepit always or just sorum the time? A sharp knock interrupted the answer; it was Steven adler door.

MattKostume said...

Appetite for distraction.

MattKostume said...

Welcome to Alice Cooper's *worst*
nightmare.

MattKostume said...

SuperDog never lost his appetite fo' de scratchin'.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Silhouette said...
If this is metalgarth, who is going to fess up to being the guy posted below?


Hey man, we have a "don't ask, don't tell" policy at Cap This! Stop with all the freakin' supposition already, Silhouette... If I, I mean someone wants to experiment with a different lifestyle in my, I mean their own living room, that's my, I mean their business! :)

Submariner said...

Army of Mom said...
I even had a cigar (no comments from the peanut gallery!)


Thanks for the visual image, sweety. Now excuse me for some "me time."

mega said...

"He's spoiled, shits all over everyone, has a bad temper, and keeps getting into fights with the people who feed him. I named him Axel."

MattKostume said...

Evil Slash had the cruel practice of posing with each of his boa's meals.

MattKostume said...

Hmm..the scariest thing, Metalgarth??...Kinda looks like Cain with a hat.