Monday, October 20, 2008

Halfway House


1. Half this house was treated with Orkin's new termite repellent, the other half with tasty barbecue sauce.

2. Welcome to affordable housing, Obama-style. Brought to you by your new HUD secretary, Tony Rezko.

3. And then Bob Vila said, "Screw it, let's just go get drunk!"

4. "It was a lovely five bedroom colonial, but then they put a McCain-Palin sign in their yard..."

5. And the number one sign you got ripped off by your time-share agent...

Best of Double the U
"Honey... did you hear something?"

Best of Silhouette
We're buying it in installments.

Best of Jack Reacher
"We have 1.6 children, 1.8 cars, and .5 house."

Best of Army of Dad
This lovely jungle bungalow has a cozy feel, open air dining and 1.5 bathrooms with room to expand!

Best of mpur
ORA: Samurai Divorce Court

Best of nicedeb
Barack Obama uses his powerful connections in Kenya to move his little brother George into a better hut.

Best of flyovercountry
After 8 years in the White House, President Obama did indeed bring the United States closer to the rest of the world, because many Americans now lived like the rest of the world.

Best of prince of leaves
2065: With the last regulatory hurdle cleared and the final shakedown payment paid to "community organizers", the post-Katrina rebuilding of New Orleans begins.

Best of Jay Guevara
"So you and the ex split amicably?"

Best of Kaptain Krude
"Gesundheit!"

Best of Son Of The Godfather
When kids on Tatooine argue about their own, personal space, never let them "draw an imaginary line" with a light sabre.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
Ancient PROVERB
Build a man a house; you give him shelter until he defaults on his other bills. Build a man half a house; maybe he'll learn a trade so's to keep out the mosquitoes.

Best of Seoulman (R)
Slowly Dorothy awoke in a daze, in the magical land of Oz wondering where the other half of the house and the other half of Toto were.

39 comments:

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Someone misinterpreted the saying - Half a taro root is better than none.

-OR-

A rare example of a "fair" divorce settlement, where everything, including the children, are split up evenly... with a chain saw.

-OR-

"Mr. Blandings Builds His Dreamhouse" meets "Gilligan's Island"

Double the U said...

"Honey... did you hear something?"

Seoulman (R) said...

Not only did Obama spread the wealth, apparently my house got spread across the nation as well.

Seoulman (R) said...

Taco Thursdays would never be the same at the Johnsons

Seoulman (R) said...

Well I guess half a bailout is better than none.

Seoulman (R) said...

The ACORN national headquarters - full of hot air, half-gone and useful to no one.

Seoulman (R) said...

Redefining Subprime housing

Silhouette said...

Apparently, a house divided CAN TOO stand!

Silhouette said...

We're buying it in installments.

Jack Reacher said...

Forced to write down its mortgage portfolio by half, Countrywide resorted to foreclosing on the equivalent value of the underlying real estate.

Jack Reacher said...

"Your room is right through that door, Mayor Nagin. Mind the first step."

Jack Reacher said...

"We have 1.6 children, 1.8 cars, and .5 house."

Jack Reacher said...

If the mortgage mess teaches us one thing, it's to never buy more house than you can afford.

Van Helsing said...

So that's what a halfway house looks like.

metalgarth said...

I freaking hate these damn shows on .5HGTV but somehow my wife loves them

metalgarth said...

The union contract stipulated that 6 men be hired to perform the demolition, but Bob had to be cheap and only hire 3.

Silhouette said...

Note to self: don't use the invisible paint at home.

Silhouette said...

Note to self: don't use the invisible paint at home.

Army of Dad said...

This lovely jungle bungalow has a cozy feel, open air dining and 1.5 bathrooms with room to expand!

Army of Dad said...

See, Barry O does support his half brother.

mpur said...

ORA: Samurai Divorce Court

nicedeb said...

Barack Obama uses his powerful connections in Kenya to move his little brother George into a better hut.

molson said...

It's HUD approved.

flyovercountry said...

Never trust that cut rate travel company when they describe your vacation condo as a "a cute bamboo accented getaway with a great garden view".

flyovercountry said...

After 8 years in the White House, President Obama did indeed bring the United States closer to the rest of the world, because many Americans now lived like the rest of the world.

Artfldgr said...

Jim was determined that Jane woudlnt keep his half of the vacation cottage: so he took it.

Artfldgr said...

The real estate lady said room with a view of the countryside, but we never thought...

Wahcko said...

Obama promised the middle class that their house payments would be cut in half and gosh dern it, he delivered.

prince of leaves said...

2065: With the last regulatory hurdle cleared and the final shakedown payment paid to "community organizers", the post-Katrina rebuilding of New Orleans begins.

Jay Guevara said...

"So you and the ex split amicably?"

Kaptain Krude said...

"Gesundheit!"

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Soaring gas prices and logistics conspire to force ABC to make drastic budget cuts to Extreme Makeover Hawaii.

Son Of The Godfather said...

When kids on Tatooine argue about their own, personal space, never let them "draw an imaginary line" with a light sabre.

Army of Mom said...

I want half Eddieeeeee!

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Ancient PROVERB
Build a man a house; you give him shelter until he defaults on his other bills. Build a man half a house; maybe he'll learn a trade so's to keep out the mosquitoes.

Seoulman (R) said...

Slowly Dorothy awoke in a daze, in the magical land of Oz wondering where the other half of the house and the other half of Toto were.

Submariner said...

PICHUR WINDOW; UR DOIN IT RONG

Submariner said...

Note to self; NEVER stand behind a Kennedy after he's had a couple a beers...

Submariner said...

Apparently, Tim had not fully completed wiring for 440 when he decided to hot check the circuits...