1. Pennywise? Swamp Thing? Gary Glitter?
2. "So, do you score a lot of candy, Crazy Overgrown Chia-head?"
3. "So, did somebody wish me here? Am I an offering to he-wh0-walks-behind-the-rows? Or do we all float down here? Which is it?"
4. "Nice try, but to be honest, neither of you guys is as scary a filibuster-proof Democratic senate majority."
5. "Hey, Little Girl. Wanna know how I got these scars?"
Best of attmay
Letting Clive Barker direct the latest Wizard of Oz remake probably wasn't such a great idea.
Best of prince of leaves
The Corn Maze owners would later pass the blame on to her parents, claiming they had no reason to suspect the little girl had a weak heart as a complication of her palsy and scoliosis.
Best of The Man
Due to the Ethanol boom, the Children of the Corn were able to upgrade their outfits.
Best of Dactyl
Willow Palin, demon hunter.
Best of Mr. Right
Liberal talk show host Bernie Ward's latest web search went for naught, all due to an unfortunate typo: "child corn".
WV: tweense (I WISH I was kidding!)
These things are getting uncannily weird...
Best of Son Of The Godfather
Stephen King teams up with Roman Polanski in Children Molestors of the Corn.