Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Someone's in the Kitchen with Chewie


1. "Hey, there's a hair in my... oh, never mind."

2. C3P0 sighed, "I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me... but at least he made breakfast after."

3. "And now on HGTV, Cooking Naked with Robin Williams..."

4. Han Solo poked his head into the hallway, "Oh, Force, she's still here... and she's making breakfast!"

5. Droids don't rip people's arms out of their sockets when they run out of cilantro ...Wookies have been known to do that...


Best of Jack Reacher
Lemme guess; you like the crunchy side of the shredded wheat. The sweet side, not so much.

Best of Dub
Ewok...the other, other, other white meat.

Best of Chewman
Hey SnoopDog! Chewie's got the munchies again! I know we just got back from Tacobell so you tell him to stay out of the fridge!

Best of Rodney Dill
Somehow the Millenium Kitchen, just didn't have the same ring to it.

Best of Army of Mom
Bitch calls me a big walking carpet. We'll see how she likes her hash browns with some special Wookie sauce in 'em.

Best of Submariner
Well, that explains the $13.57 in water bills with a companion $3,681.53 in rotor rooting of shower drains.

Best of Carpe Phlogiston
"Stupid? Hell, yeah, I feel stupid. 'Bathing in Rogaine' sounded like a fun reality show. The 3-day soak wasn't bad, but I wimped out during the Brazilian wax tie-breaker challenge."

Best of Silhouette
Let me guess. He's making chewy nut brownies, chewy pecan squares, and chewy oatmeal raisin cookies.

Yes, I said chewy nut brownies. What of it?

Best of Whacko
"I'm a little teapot short and --- damn it! I'm a giant fur ball!"

Best of GregMan
"Dammit, where's the arugula?! How do you expect me to make breakfast without any arugula!?!"

43 comments:

Passionate Conservative said...

Leia gasped, "You came in that? you're braver than I thought!"

Passionate Conservative said...

Cousin It was pissed. "I had that idea already! This poser ripped me off!

Passionate Conservative said...

Bob found a furball on the kitchen floor. The problem was it didn't know how to make a decent cup of coffee.

Jack Reacher said...

Lemme guess; you like the crunchy side of the shredded wheat. The sweet side, not so much.

Rodney Dill said...

"And now on HGTV, Cooking Naked with Robin Williams..."

can't top that one.

Anonymous said...

After an uncomfortable silence, the said off camera, "Honey, It isn't what you think..."

Army of Dad said...

hmm, after hearing the wookie screams last night I thought you were the bitch, but now Chewie is cooking...

Army of Dad said...

Seriously no ewoks in the eggs today, please?

Army of Dad said...

NO, don't light the stove with a blaster!

Rodney Dill said...

Rogaine Trial #217: Fail...

Dub said...

Ewok...the other white meat.

mpur said...

"Ma, there's a critter in the kitchen again!"

"Dammit, how many times have I told you to make sure the cat door is closed at night?"

mpur said...

"Next, on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous..."

Chewman said...

Hey SnoopDog! Chewie's got the munchies again! I know we just got back from Tacobell so you tell him to stay out of the fridge!

Rodney Dill said...

Somehow the Millenium Kitchen, just didn't have the same ring to it.

Rodney Dill said...

No Chewie, I said cook in a wok, not cook ewoks

Anonymous said...

I wanted some nookie and ended up with some Wookie! WTF did I drink last night?

Army of Mom said...

Get in there, you big furry oaf! I don't care what you smell!

*Chewie thought bubble*
Send me in the kitchen. Who does he think he is? He's the one who got frozen in carbonite. Wasn't me. Thinks he's so smart

Army of Mom said...

Bitch calls me a big walking carpet. We'll see how she likes her hash browns with some special Wookie sauce in 'em.

Army of Mom said...

You like his cooking? Just wait till you see him in a metal bikini.

Submariner said...

ORA:

Shave him and you get Damon Wayans...

Submariner said...

What's left for you after you get cut by the National's farm system...

Submariner said...

Well, that explains the $13.57 in water bills with a companion $3,681.53 in rotor rooting of shower drains.

Submariner said...

Dabnabbit, Marge! Would you and Billy quit posing and get your sorry arses in here for breakfast? We're gonna be late for the Leonard Nimoy keynote at this rate!

Submariner said...

No, Chewie! Your blaster is NOT a good choice for clearing the disposal...

Submariner said...

You ever notice that a Wookie's cry sounds like a long, drawn out "Barack!" I'm just sayin'...

Submariner said...

Chewie making waffles in the morning lets me know that it probably wasn't a "Hand, Solo" for Harrison Ford last night...

Carpe Phlogiston said...

"Stupid? Hell, yeah, I feel stupid. 'Bathing in Rogaine' sounded like a fun reality show. The 3-day soak wasn't bad, but I wimped out during the Brazilian wax tie-breaker challenge."

Carpe Phlogiston said...

ZZ Top lookalike contestant rejected by judges who said he played a guitar like a wookie. He claimed it was static electricity-induced fret buzz.

Silhouette said...

Let me guess. He's making chewy nut brownies, chewy pecan squares, and chewy oatmeal raisin cookies.

Yes, I said chewy nut brownies. What of it?

Whacko said...

"I'm a little teapot short and --- damn it! I'm a giant fur ball!"

Rodney Dill said...

Dallhauser before photo.
(ORA)

GregMan said...

"Dammit, where's the arugula?! How do you expect me to make breakfast without any arugula!?!"

GregMan said...

I'd heard that John Edwards likes them old and hairy, but this is rediculous...

GregMan said...

Man, Rielle Hunter has really let herself go since the story broke...

GregMan said...

Enumclaw and Folsom Street, together at last.

sonicfrog said...

What ever you do, don't complain to the chef that the calamari is chewie....

sonicfrog said...

♫ Someone's in the kitchen with Chewie
Someone's in the kitchen I know ow ow ow,
Someone's in the kitchen with Chewie
Strumming on the old banjosa... ♫

sonicfrog said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sonicfrog said...

So, let me see - Mark Hamill is stuck doing cartoon voice overs, Vader's shilling burgers for Roland McDonald, and Chewie is broke, destitute, and reduced to living in a trailer park. Man, did Lucas screwed everyone involved with Star Wars, or what???

Adjustah said...

"Chewie??"

"Yes. Yes, she was..."

mega said...

Bill, now in his sixth month of training for the Shick tri-blade TV-spot audition, felt confident and ready to take on the acting world.

Rodney Dill said...

"I thought this was only gonna happen to the palms of my hands."