Tuesday, July 22, 2008

That Boy Ain't Right





1. It was a hard-knock life for Little Rock's only gay manwhore.

2. Ricky's parents were last seen on the phone with Planned Parenthood asking about 70th trimester abortions.

3. "So, um... no football camp this summer, son?"

4. Calvin Klein's new back-to-school ads were intended to "broaden the brand's appeal" but mostly succeeded in turning rednecks into gay pederasts.

5. Back in the 90's, Ricky's Momma mixed a lot of Zima and Ecstasy during her pregnancy.

Best of Jack Reacher
"Might as well get you a Prius and DNC membership card right now," sighed Timmy's father.

Best of attmay
Jimmy's mother wasn't sure what was worse: that he was gay, or that he was gay and had atrocious taste.

Best of Dr. G
After losing weight and five hard years at Arlen H S, Bobby Hill found his purpose in life, Propane B*tch for Thatherton Fuels. Naturally Hank did not approve.

Best of GregMan
How Nature says, "Inbreeding is bad."

Best of Dub
I can has my eyez gouged out?

Best of Gagdad Bob
It's the timeless art of seduction! You gotta join in the dance. She sends you an enticing photo, you send her one right back.

Best of mpur
Poorly coordinated and butt ugly is no way to go through life, son.

Best of Van Helsing
Obama vets VP candidates who can help him in Flyover Country without alienating his base.

Best of Paul
Timmy's photo entry for 'What not to wear', 'Queer eye for the straight (snort) guy' and Lifetime's new show, 'Yoga for Drag Queens'.

Best of The Man
It's either going to be American Idol or So You Think You Can Dance, pick one to fail on and take my shoes off.

Best of Chewman
One drunken night when Boy George tried it straight and look at the results!

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Spike heels with striped Capri pants, a logo shirt with a Pink baseball cap? Is he mad?

Jack Reacher said...

It was possible to mark the exact day that John Waters' films became available at the Enumclaw Blockbuster store.

Jack Reacher said...

"Might as well get you a Prius and DNC membership card right now," sighed Timmy's father.
*W/V--sluct

attmay said...

Jimmy's mother wasn't sure what was worse: that he was gay, or that he was gay and had atrocious taste.

Dr. G said...

After losing weight and five hard years at Arlen H S, Bobby Hill found his purpose in life, Propane B*tch for Thatherton Fuels. Naturally Hank did not approve.

GregMan said...

How Nature says, "Inbreeding is bad."

GregMan said...

At least he's not bitter.

Dub said...

I can has my eyez gouged out?

Gagdad Bob said...

It's the timeless art of seduction! You gotta join in the dance. She sends you an enticing photo, you send her one right back.

mpur said...

Poorly coordinated and butt ugly is no way to go through life, son.

Van Helsing said...

Obama vets VP candidates who can help him in Flyover Country without alienating his base.

Jay Guevara said...

How Nature says, "Stay away."

Paul said...

Timmy's photo entry for 'What not to wear', 'Queer eye for the straight (snort) guy' and Lifetime's new show, 'Yoga for Drag Queens'.

The Man said...

It's either going to be American Idol or So You Think You Can Dance, pick one to fail on and take my shoes off.

Chewman said...

One drunken night when Boy George tried it straight and look at the results!

prince of leaves said...

ORA: "I had my legs lengthened. Now they go all the way up."

sonicfrog said...

Gay-ngly.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

To buttress their case against imported medicines, the FDA's poster child is Elmer, a wannabe football jock who went to Mexico for HGH injections but who instead received female giraffe hormones made in India.