Monday, July 28, 2008

Sucky McSuck Sucks

Survey Taker


1. "Maverick, if you're going to do an impression of Chris Matthews 'interviewing' The Obama, the mike needs to be in your other hand."

2. "Parkinson's is a b1tch, ain't it Maverick?"

3. "Hey, your bones really are like putty."

4. "It's fine, Hillary. Please don't spit on your handkerchief. Your venom burns like acid."

5. "Senator, I know he's Indian, and I know modern things confuse and frighten you, but let me see if I can explain exactly why Bobby Jindal won't 'smoke-um peace pipe' with you..."

Best of Double the U
Knocked him out cold with a thumb punch.

Best of Silhouette
"In a effort to appear younger, McCain campaigned this week with his mother."

Best of Jack Reacher
His face always sticks like that when he yells at the kids on his lawn.

Best of Jack Reacher
"I'm crushing your head, I'm crushing your...oh, SH**! I really crushed it! Help!"

Best of lawhawk
Dude. It's not a tumor.

Best of Army of Mom
Mistakenly thinking it is still the early 80s, McCain goes for the urban youth vote by trying to do the robot.

Best of Submariner
A little Bondo right here... and, Voila! You're ready for the cameras again, Senator.

23 comments:

Double the U said...

Knocked him out cold with a thumb punch.

Silhouette said...

"In a effort to appear younger, McCain campaigned this week with his mother."

Jack Reacher said...

His face always sticks like that when he yells at the kids on his lawn.

Jack Reacher said...

"I'm crushing your head, I'm crushing your...oh, SH**! I really crushed it! Help!"

Rodney Dill said...

"...but if you put a golf ball in the right side it will balance out your cheeks, John."

Passionate Conservative said...

No Hilz, the gland problem is on the other cheek...

lawhawk said...

Dude. It's not a tumor.

Army of Mom said...

Possibly.

Think of Antonia from MadTV.

Army of Mom said...

Maverick does his Rocky impersonation.

Army of Mom said...

Mork calling Orson.

Army of Mom said...

Maverick auditions for a role as a sleestack in the 2009 Wil Ferrell Land of the Lost movie.

Army of Mom said...

Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto

Army of Mom said...

Mistakenly thinking it is still the early 80s, McCain goes for the urban youth vote by trying to do the robot.

Army of Mom said...

Promoting prostate health, McCain takes his annual exam public.

Army of Mom said...

McCain has no achilles heel. He does however have a thumb with spit on it.

Army of Mom said...

Gonna give you a wet willy!!!!

Army of Mom said...

Don't tase me, bro!

Army of Mom said...

Oh, its your favorite tonight, Johnny. Tapioca! Oh, look, you got a little spittle on our chin. Let me get that for you. When we're done with din-din, we'll all go play Bingo in the activities hall.

Army of Mom said...

See the back of my hand? Don't make me smack you, ho.

Army of Mom said...

The bitch slap is strong with this one.

mpur said...

Ma! Stop it!

Submariner said...

A little Bondo right here... and, Voila! You're ready for the cameras again, Senator.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Were it not for his automatic flinching reflex kicking in when adoring man hands try to pinch off flesh souvenirs, John's head would now be the size of a walnut.