1. Chelsea was used to saying "They are real, and they're spectacular," but not to her own dad.
2. "Yeah, I got mom's thighs and your nose... thank you so bloody much."
3. "Yeah, looks like mom just stole your date, dad. (Pause) We're not a family in the conventional sense, are we?"
4. "An 'Electra Complex?' I don't know what that is, daddy, but it sounds kinky!"
5. "Do I think Michelle Obama 'gets freaky?' Jeez, dad, can't you keep it in your pants for more than five minutes?"
Best of Jack Reacher
Breasts don't usually eat hands, but Clinton breasts appear to be carnivorous.
Best of Silhouette
I see Hillary's proof reader has been doing the signs for this year's Oscars.
Best of sonicfrog
"What's happenin', Hot Stuff..."
Best of Jay Guevara
"Am I feeling Chelsea's tits? It depends on what your definition of 'tits' is."
Best of Army of Mom
Sooo, that's how it is in that family.
Best of Steve O
Bill was always suspicious of the fact that Chelsea was born nine months after Hillary met with The Joker.
28 comments:
Is that a muffin top I see?
"Is that your friend Dawn, over by the Old Navy? Think you could introduce me?"
Breasts don't usually eat hands, but Clinton breasts appear to be carnivorous.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking, Chels?"
"Yeah; that way that man handles the tiger cubs gets me hot."
I see Hillary's proof reader has been doing the signs for this year's Oscars.
"What's happenin', Hot Stuff..."
"By night's end, I predict me and her will interface."
"Why do you think you're a dork? I don't think you're a dork. I don't think Mom thinks you're a dork..."
"I want a serious girlfriend. Somebody I can love, that's gonna love me back. Is that psycho?"
Honey, let me explain the Arkansas definition of "Relative Humidity."
Gennifer, Paula, Monica, and now Chelsea - all recipients of "Mr. Gropey's" side-opening blouse. Each gift comes with a coupon for an obligatory manual mammogram.
Willy: No guys, this one really IS my daughter...Really
Chelsea: I hate my life
"I feel your...uh...well, not pain exactly, ..."
"Am I feeling Chelsea's tits? It depends on what your definition of 'tits' is."
"Hillary, she’s gotten her boobies. Oh, and they are so perky..."
And here he is, that master of misinformation, Mr. Know-It-All.
Nothing up my sleeve, presto!
*obscure Rocky and Bullwinkle dialog*
Nope. No sir. I'm not trying to sneak a twinkie into the event. Nope, nothing up my sleeve at all. Right, Chels?
Dad, once and for all, will you stop doing the Bob Dole Viagra ad? And, stop calling me Libby.
Sooo, that's how it is in that family.
*Ferris Bueller line*
No, dad. I will not pull your finger.
You can take the man out of Arkansas, but you can't take the Arkansas out of the man. Up his sleeve you ask? Yep, a can of Bud Light.
Ok, dad. Enough of the Star Wars jokes. Yes, yes, I know you are my father. *sigh* We're already on the dark side, alright?
Ok, dad. Enough of the Star Wars jokes. Yes, yes, I know you are my father. *sigh* We're already on the dark side, alright?
And for my next trick I will show you where my right hand is!
Bill and his "disappearing hand trick."
Okay, I can see how he might do the "disappearing hand trick" but where the freak is his entire right arm?!!
Even Chelsea, with her "JV Rig" is still at risk.
"Hey heeyyyyy! It's my own DNAaaa! It's like feeling myself up! So it's okaaayyy!!"
Bill was always suspicious of the fact that Chelsea was born nine months after Hillary met with The Joker.
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