Thursday, July 17, 2008

Grrr

K is P
If anyone needs me, I'll be in Ohio...

Best of mpur
Yes, Ma'am, as a representative of PETA, I must insist you remove the fur and leather immediately. No, no, slowly...yeah...that's it.

Best of shoechick
Ahhh, the magic of airbrush at work - not only are her nipples missing, but she is actually a 400 pound housewife from Wyoming.

Best of Chewman
The latest addition from Ted Nugent Lingerie. Optional feather boa made from real spotted owl sold separately!

Best of Army of Dad
Public service notice: Waving a fan at the screen will not get her hair to move. Even if you wave it really really fast.

27 comments:

mpur said...

Yes, Ma'am, as a representative of PETA, I must insist you remove the fur and leather immediately. No, no, slowly...yeah...that's it.

shoechick said...

Ahhh, the magic of airbrush at work - not only are her nipples missing, but she is actually a 400 pound housewife from Wyoming.

Chewman said...

Honey! I love your idea of a hunting suit but I wont be able to concentrate or shoot straight if you wear that!

Chewman said...

The latest addition from Ted Nugent Lingerie. Optional feather boa made from real spotted owl sold separately!

Anonymous said...

The Democrat's latest weapon to distract voters from the real issues.

A Misogynist

Dub said...

Dub's arousal quickly subsided when he noticed the unfortunately wide hips. While he is an assman, he's not a bigassman.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

To comply with US nutritional label law, her huge butt needs a tramp stamp.
Ingredients: Alloderm-puffed lips, silicone-puffed tits, air-brushed zits. Artificial colors, flavors and fragrances added. May contain carcinogenic bleaches, dyes, paints. Artificial sweetness fades upon exposure to polysyllabic words or manual labor.
Picture on box differs from actual product.
Significant natural settling WILL occur. For best results, mix with alcohol.
Allergy Info: Manufactured by plastic surgeons who process nuts.
Causes excitability in post-pubescents. Contains 0 gms fat, 0 gms of any adult MDR, 0 muscle tone. Slightly addictive. Not recommended for monogamous relationships.
Unit Pricing: If you have to ask, you can't afford it.
Shelf life: Expires before 30.

Army of Mom said...

Please tell me that you people really don't think she has a big butt. Geebus.

Dub said...

Sorry army mom, butt yes, she is a bit hefty in haunches. Dont get me wrong, I'd still take her for a spin around the block, butt I prefer my ladies to be a tad more aerodynamic.

B'sides, if her hips are wider than her shoulders, there is a problem.

Then again, perhaps a bee stung her in the rear, and she's just a bit swollen.

Hmm...this is hardly a witty caption now. Oh well.

Paul said...

Her name is Ohio???

prince of leaves said...

See, that's the problem with long hair -- it's always getting in the way.

Steve O said...

Army of Mom, the problem is that we retards are too used to the usual fare of dating supermodels.

I'd probably have sympathy sex with her though.

Steve O said...

Time to PETA the meata.

ochagirl said...

Army of Mom: The butt is in the eye of the holder . . . er, beholder. Whatever. I mean, they have to at least be as big as her boobs. ;-)

ochagirl said...

Model Tina: "This isn't what you PETA people think. Let me tell you a sad story of a mother snow leopard that was dying slowly, and the cubs in her womb were in danger of perishing. SO, with the help of the latest technology, I am bring them to gestation in my breasts, and I will act as their surrogate mother when they're ready to come out. Ergo the reason for the fur trim of their mother on my vest."

Army of Mom said...

V - never have a swim party, cuz I ain't coming. This group would harpoon me.

Kaptain Krude said...

Army of Mom - I'd harpoon you, alright.

Oh, hi, Army of Dad. Just, uh, talking with Army of... say, what are you doing with that gun? Oh, uh, just remembered, appointment across town, love to stay but um gotta go now, bye!

Army of Mom said...

Kaptain K - thank you, I think.

Army of Mom said...

Yep, she washed up on beach this morning. I wuz thinking of throwin her back cuz she's sa skinny n all. But, that Dub feller keeps talkin 'bout all the meat on 'er bones. So, ah's thinkin on keepin her.

She'll make some juicy eatin.

Army of Mom said...

This picture + Dub's bigass comment = anorexia motivation for women across the nation.

Army of Mom said...

Does this make me look fat?

Army of Mom said...

Ironically, leopards are an endangered species after they used all that fur to make the outfit for this plus-size model.

*please note the sarcasm here*

mega said...

The sad thing is, if she had been able to unlock her right arm from that position anytime in the last 15 years, Karen probably coulda had a man.

mega said...

The solution had been staring MSNBC right in the face, for years. Olbermann was dumped, new talent hired, and within 48 hours they were crushing FoxNews in the ratings.

Dub said...

"This picture + Dub's bigass comment = anorexia motivation for women across the nation."

Nope...they're no good either. Its all about proportion...and a lack of pie pan nipples.

Army of Dad said...

Public service notice: Waving a fan at the screen will not get her hair to move. Even if you wave it really really fast.

Steve O said...

She's game.