Frank IBC
1. "I swear to Allah, Sullivan, if you ask to 'push in my stool' one more time, the bus is gonna be goin' over a big, fat, English-fairy speed-bump."
2. "Demand for my farts has grown exponentially, hence the larger tubes."
3. Shouldn't there be a tall, conical hat on his head? I mean, in addition to the pipes coming out of his ass?
4. ♫ "People... people who need people... are the luckiest people I know..." ♫
5. "I have an inflatable rubber cowboy. We do it on the stove."
Instantly promoted best of Gagdad Bob
"And I'm the same person today, except back then I had the pipe in my mouth and talked out of my ass."
Best of R. Bateman
And, hey, if you babes need yet another reason to revere me as your god...I'm serious...it's this long.
Best of Carpe Phlogiston
The secret's out... in preparation for every speechifying event, Bamarama has to be plugged into hot air ductwork and overinflated to the recommended DNC hyperbole psi. Balance is still a serious problem, though; he always pulls to the left once he gets rolling on the open stage.
Best of metalgarth
Carl's Poetry Readings never really caught on at Moe's Tavern
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"Yes, my tie is caught in my fly... Next question?"
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"My sincerest hope is that this election won't be about race... And I'm speaking directly to the honkies out there..."
Best of Jack Reacher
"Ideally, the bong should be about this wide."
Best of mpur
"And then Scarlett wrote: 'I want to rub my alabaster breasts against your Mandingo chest', and that was when Michelle found my email archive."
Best of Adjustah
IM IN UR FREEZER EATIN UR JELLO PUDDIN POPS DIDDLY DOO BOP DOP BEEBOP...
34 comments:
And, hey, if you babes need yet another reason to revere me as your god...I'm serious...it's this long.
And the Sorting Hat puts him in Slytherin!
Yet another comedy routine performed by B.O.
The secret's out... in preparation for every speechifying event, Bamarama has to be plugged into hot air ductwork and overinflated to the recommended DNC hyperbole psi. Balance is still a serious problem, though; he always pulls to the left once he gets rolling on the open stage.
Poetry Readings never really caught on at Moe's Tavern
Whoa there Andrew... back off on the pressure in the yellow feed tube, can't you see his pants are getting big!
"I have an inflatable rubber cowboy. We do it on the stove."
Barack drives it home on the range?
"Could someone assist Mr.Matthews in the front row here? His leg seems to be having a seizure."
America's Messiah comes home to roost
"Yes, my tie is caught in my fly... Next question?"
Doctors will have new tools available to them under my health care plan...
"That wasn't the white, racist grandma I knew... That wasn't the Reverend Wright I knew... That wasn't the Bill Ayers I knew... That wasn't the... Hey! Who the (intercourse) keeps replacing all the people in my life with replicants?"
Cylon Hybrid: "Number 12 is active and online! Jump!"
We Title This Picture:
A Tool And His Stool
"...So that is why Winnie the Pooh should shape U.S. foreign policy... You see, the wonderful things about Tiggers is that Tiggers are wonderful things!..."
*aide whispers in his ear*
"I'm sorry, I'm informed that the character of 'Piglet' may be offensive to some of my most ardent supporters and their faith... Also, in order to appease my P.C. supporters, the term 'Tigger' has been changed to 'Tegro'"
"My sincerest hope is that this election won't be about race... And I'm speaking directly to the honkies out there..."
Obama tries to answer the public outcry about his killing a seal that was less than a week old.
Shamelessly stolen from an e-mail Glenn got over at Instapundit
Once the curtain is pulled aside, we see that the Obamamessiah is nothing more than a lame black guy on a cheap stool backstage.
Tegro...most excellent!
"And I'm the same person today, except back then I had the pipe in my mouth and talked out of my ass."
"I’m a man of hope and change, a man for the socialist new age nirvana, unburdened by logic and free from any false sense of patriotism. I’m diversity and multi-culturalism personified, a post-neo-con Islamic sleeper that is seeking the demise of Amerikkka by being ecologically correct. My picture has been downloaded by every weirdo commie in the country, and fruitcakes and white girls faint when they see me. My shit don’t stink and I’ve got pipes coming outa my ass to supply a gaseous form of crack that causes leg tremors in the liberal media.”
These are not the crack pipes I once knew.
"Ideally, the bong should be about this wide."
"So I'm just wondering--was Michael supposed to be the Ebony or the Ivory. It could go either way, if you ask me."
Better go to Freeeee Credit
Report Dot Com....
"Take my wife...please!"
Crack pipes we can believe in.
"Bitter? Damn near chewed her head off!"
“In an effort to appeal to the ‘sticky eye’ vote, the modified Presidential Seal has been omitted, the phallic pipes have been added, and the bulge of my unit is in full view. Go nuts, former Hillary supporters, go nuts!”
People were left wondering just who's arm is reaching into Obama's pants.
Barack answer the question on everyone's mind: Is it twue what they say about the way the way you people are ...gifted?
"And then Scarlett wrote: 'I want to rub my alabaster breasts against your Mandingo chest', and that was when Michelle found my email archive."
It may not be very long ladies, but it is this big around.
IM IN UR FREEZER EATIN UR JELLO PUDDIN POPS DIDDLY DOO BOP DOP BEEBOP...
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