1. Standard Cap #4,038 "Swing your partner, dosey do, Amerikkka has got to go..."
2. "... and then get me some french fried taters, mmmm-hrrrmmmmmm." Hussein thought he was hiring James Carville for campaign advice, but it turned out to be the retard from Slingblade. No one in the campaign or the MSM seemed to notice.
3. "Derrrr... me like hope and change and stuff... derrrr...." Hussein was just a bit lost without his TelePrompter.
4. "These microphones smell worse than Gavin Newsom's ass... or, exactly the same, come to think of it."
5. "Hey, Michelle, I found your marital aid!"
Wicked Best of Jack Reacher
..dat ol' man river,
he just keeps rollin' a----long...
Best of Rodney Dill
...and I live in a donor paid for mansion, down by the river.
Best of Army of Dad
I would like to thank all of you for coming, I know how hard it is to get here from all 57 states with gas prices like this.
Best of duke of red
"Jaqueline Morris, COME ON DOOOWWWWNNNN!!!"
Best of Silhouette
He was just playing around with the sound system, but suddenly, the dad of every boy named Luke looked at their wives with suspicion.
Best of Jay Guevara
"Pardon me while I whip this out."
C'mon, you guys are slipping!
Best of Two Dogs
While Barry was practicing his Sammy Davis Jr. impression to sucker in the Jews, the pistol flew clean out of his hand.
(Yes, I know that no one will get that one, but the hatred is blinding me.)
Best of Jack Reacher
"On behalf of Dawn, I'm proud to announce the opening of the 4,327th Old Navy Store! Cut the ribbon, please!"
Best of Chrees
"These are not the microphones I knew!"
Best of sonicfrog
Well, if his technique is actually as good as it looks, he's got my vote!!!!
Best of prince of leaves
Obama won the Creative Belching Forum's annual contest with his breathtaking burp-recitation of the entire "Communist Manifesto".
Best of R. Bateman aka Pendark
And while The Bat Man is busy trying to save the people from the bomb, I'll release the Super virus into the bay, contaminating the entire water supply!
Best of Adjustah
"How did I get here? Seriously, I have no idea..."
Best of mega
Though it seemed like overkill, the truth is that Lightworkers always get two mics. One to record the words, and the other to record the harmonic vibrations of the Lightworker's inner aura.