Saturday, June 28, 2008

Here I Sit All Broken-Hearted...


1. "See! The Bushitler Torture Regime's Death Cubicles can barely accommodate my wide stance."

2. easyJet's new passenger lounges left something to be desired.

3. "And you will stay in Camp Jeremiah Wright until you recant your heresies against the Obamassiah!"

4. "I don't mind the chains and shackles, but I wish they'd get rid of that damn trumpet player."

5. Mel Gibson was shocked to find himself in prison. "I thought 'sugar tits' was a compliment!"

Best of Rodney Dill
Larry Craig, why have you forsaken me.

Best of The Man
It's amazing what $2,500 a month in rent will get you in the East Village these days.

Best of mega
Aiden tried to look "miserable" and "tortured", but the truth was, this room was a vast improvement on living in his mom's unfinished basement.

Best of Jack Reacher
While the weather was an improvement, all in all Dave wished he hadn't been caught smoking in Mayor Bloomberg's New York.

Best of the doyle
The Headless Horseman was finally captured and thrown into Gitmo for terrorizing Sleepy Hollow.

Best of Chewman
The latest way the NFL found to ensure players make it to game day.

Best of robert
New Kohler ad where a house is built around a stainless steel toilet-sink combo.

Best of Chrees
Speaking truth to power. Or maybe just gibberish to a wanking audience.

Best of attmay
I begged him to wear a condom! I BEGGED him! I wonder who else he's infected.

Best of Submariner
I'm sorry about Mr. Miyagi, but I just couldn't take one more "Daniel-san - wax on; wax off!"

Best of GregMan
What really happened to the kid who wouldn't get off Senator McCain's lawn.

40 comments:

Rodney Dill said...

Larry Craig, why have you forsaken me.

The Man said...

It's amazing what $2,500 a month in rent will get you in the East Village these days.

Son Of The Godfather said...

He should "Gitmo" fiber.

Son Of The Godfather said...

It's o.k. that he's crapping in there... That piece of paper is an evacuation notice.

mega said...

Aiden tried to look "miserable" and "tortured", but the truth was, this room was a vast improvement on living in his mom's unfinished basement.

mega said...

The walk-in closets provided to gitmo detainees were spacious and airy, with beautiful views of the ocean.

Jack Reacher said...

Under the Obama regime, penal colonies for those accused of conservative thoughtcrimes spread even to Obama's home state of Hawaii, recently renamed New Iran.

Jack Reacher said...

While the weather was an improvement, all in all Dave wished he hadn't been caught smoking in Mayor Bloomberg's New York.

the doyle said...

The Headless Horseman was finally captured and thrown into Gitmo for terrorizing Sleepy Hollow.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

Obama claims he was just trying to make fashion statement by wearing an orange prison jumpsuit onto the plane. It took 3 weeks for him to get word to his handlers that he'd be late to the next Unity sing-a-thon. Who says TSA doesn't have a sense of humor?

Van Helsing said...

Next, Amnesty International will righteously protest human rights violations in a country where they actually occur, like Iran. Right after Michael Moore sprouts wings and flies to the moon.

Achilles said...

Peter regrets referring to his younger brother David as "smelly."

Jay Guevara said...

2009: "All I said was, 'George Bush wasn't all bad.'"

or

"All I said was, 'Perhaps he's not the Messiah.'"

Achilles said...

"If I were just a little more limber, this confinement wouldn't be so bad."

prince of leaves said...

The protestors took some license with their mockup of a "typical Gitmo detention cell". Like, leaving out the healthy meals and snacks, ethnically-appropriate clothing accessories, free copies of the Koran, the big arrow on the ground pointing to Mecca, and the guards under orders to be excessively solicitous to the delicate religious sensibilities of the inmates when dealing with any of the above.

prince of leaves said...

Cheer up, Achmed -- your friends on the left will soon have you transferred to a stateside prison, where you'll be getting *ass-raped* five times a day instead of the call to prayer.

Gagdad Bob said...

Mohammed silently thanks Allah he is not living in a UN-run Palestinian refugee camp.

Chewman said...

The latest way the NFL found to ensure players make it to game day.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Gitmo and PODs team up for more economical detention.

Ricky Raccoon said...

"Awe crap… surf and turf again!"

robert said...

The new Porta-Box(tm) comes in a wide selection of colors and is an ideal place to place to store recalcitrant terrorists and moonbats.

Cubicle dwellers everywhere would love a box like this: more space, a window, and a door!

New Kohler ad where a house is built around a stainless steel toilet-sink combo.

Chrees said...

Speaking truth to power. Or maybe just gibberish to a wanking audience.

Chrees said...

Kobe begins to wonder how Shaq's ass really does taste.

Tim said...

Maximum security prison, Beverly Hills style.

attmay said...

I begged him to wear a condom! I BEGGED him! I wonder who else he's infected.

mpur said...

This traveling display seemed like a great idea until it arrived in Louisiana and the folks in FEMA trailers got a good look at the terrorists' accommodations. Then all hell broke loose.

Submariner said...

We Can Hold A TruckLoad™ Brand - When Oops I Crapped My Pants™ brand just doesn't provide enough protection...

Submariner said...

Him? He served bacon falafel in GITMO...

Submariner said...

Boxer's plastic surgeon lives to rue the day he bought her botox supply at Sam's Club...

Submariner said...

DNC Cap - "He asked."
RNC Cap - "He told."

Submariner said...

I'm sorry about Mr. Miyagi, but I just couldn't take one more "Daniel-san - wax on; wax off!"

Submariner said...

I TOLD you, SOTG - "Keep your paws off The Man's prom date." But would you listen? Noooooo...

divine miss m said...

Being seen in the orange jumpsuit isn't half as humiliating as having the guards see your shiny leopard-print acetate man-panties.

Targetpractice said...

The latest craze in the moonbat community: Terrorist-In-A-Box.

Targetpractice said...

Another Hillary supporter learns why it is not a good idea to threaten to vote for John McCain instead of jumping on the Obama bandwagon.

Targetpractice said...

"All I said was 'Mr Gore, I don't think global warming is beyond debate.'"

GregMan said...

What really happened to the kid who wouldn't get off Senator McCain's lawn.

GregMan said...

Cris the republican finds out the hard war about the sacrifices President Obamessiah would force us to make.

GregMan said...

"All I said was, 'What's the worst that could happen during an Obama presidency?'"

GregMan said...

How President Obamessiah implemented the new Fairness Doctrine.