Monday, June 23, 2008

Haven't Made Fun of this Piece of Social Debris in a while.


1. Amy Winehouse achieved a new milestone this week when a People magazine poll voted her "Person People Would Least Like to See Naked," beating out John McCain, Michael Moore, and the Chinese Tumor Guy.

2. "Be out in a minute. I'm in here shooting smack with the guys who write Democrat foreign policy."

3. "For all those Vegas bookies taking odds on when I die, two words: Keith Richards."

4. Billy Ray took one look at this and told Mylie to "put your damn britches back on."

5. "Crystal meth? No thanks, but I'll take some ginger ale if you have any."

Best of Jack Reacher
"Actually, that is the Amy Winehoue I know," confirmed Senator Obama.

Best of Jack Reacher
"I'll be with you in a second. I'm advising the Federal Reserve right now."

Best of Whacko
"I'm trying to prove that I'm immortal. Drugs, tobacco, and HIV infected tattoo needles can't kill me so I'll try self-amputation. Be out in a sec."

Best of Chrees
And at the intersection of Trainwreck Avenue and Downward Spiral Circle we find...

Best of mpur
It's sad day when you realize you miss the decorum and grace of Paris Hilton.

Best of mpur
All hail the Skank Queen!

Best of Army of Mom
Next on E's True Hollywood Story: Elvira, the crack years.

Best of Not Dwight
"Stay clean? Yeah right! And V the K will finally promote one of Dwight's captions to Best Of... status! Beyatch, puh-lease!"

Best of robert
Since money is tight, Michael Jackson has his sex-change, hairdo, and tattoos done in one appointment.

Best of robert
I'm so proud of my daughter, the slut. - Mitch Winehouse

Best of mega
The new series "Inked: Concentration Camp" was controversial but wildly popular.

Best of Steve O
Right. As if she's below the standards of any one of us retards.

Best of Adjustah
♫ Some crack, some meth', pass out while I singz...theeeese are a few of my favortite things... ♫

35 comments:

Army of Dad said...

Sweetie, it isn't the costume that makes you Queen of the Damned hot-you don't have the body.

Van Helsing said...

Her brain tumor looks like it's about ready to burst.

Jack Reacher said...

"Actually, that is the Amy Winehoue I know," confirmed Senator Obama.

Jack Reacher said...

"I'll be with you in a second. I'm advising the Federal Reserve right now."

Whacko said...

"I'm trying to prove that I'm immortal. Drugs, tobacco, and HIV infected tattoo needles can't kill me so I'll try self-amputation. Be out in a sec."

sonicfrog said...

OMG! Prince! What have you DONE!!!!

Chrees said...

And at the intersection of Trainwreck Avenue and Downward Spiral Circle we find...

mpur said...

It's sad day when you realize you miss the decorum and grace of Paris Hilton.

Army of Mom said...

*cough, cough, sputter*

Time for another drag.

Army of Mom said...

Unlike Snow White whose little bluebirds flitted around her singing, Amy Winehouse's birds live in a nest on top of her head. And, just so you know, that ain't eyeliner in the corner of her eyes. She's going green and using the bird droppings from her hair.

mpur said...

All hail the Skank Queen!

Army of Mom said...

I ain't got the time,
And if my Daddy thinks I'm fine,
He’s tried to make me go to rehab,
I won't go, go, go.

*coughing, dragging from crack pipe*

Army of Mom said...

The kind of zombie that SHOULD eat brains. She could use some.

Army of Mom said...

Definitely isn't a Thursday.

Army of Mom said...

Brittany, Lindsey, come on!

Army of Mom said...

Oddly enough, I look sort of like this after I wake up after a late-night bender and endless hours of sex. Ok, minus the heroin chic, bird's nest hair and tats.

Army of Mom said...

Next on E's True Hollywood Story: Elvira, the crack years.

GregMan said...

Man, Doctor Girlfriend has really let herself go.

GregMan said...

Did somebody say, "Where's a skanky wh0re when you need one?"

GregMan said...

Believe it or not, after a few years of President Obamessiah's Sex Ed for Kindergartners, this is gonna look pretty virtuous by comparison.

Not Dwight said...

"Stay clean? Yeah right! And V the K will finally promote one of Dwight's captions to Best Of... status! Beyatch, puh-lease!"

Double the U said...

yah, can you come back later? I have a huge pot of meth cooking on the stove and you know if you don't keep you eye on it, it will just explode.

robert said...

Since money is tight, Michael Jackson has his sex-change, hairdo, and tattoos done in one appointment.

After one look at that, Mr. Slave conceded the "I'm the Biggest Slut in the World" contest.

I'm so proud of my daughter, the slut. - Mitch Winehouse

Mommy! The baby sitter's here!

prince of leaves said...

In the sequel to "Independence Day", the alien invaders trade in their powered combat carapaces for infiltration skin-suits.

prince of leaves said...

Man, that Fran Drescher has really let herself go.

mega said...

The new series "Inked: Concentration Camp" was controversial but wildly popular.

Steve O said...

Right.

As if she's below the standards of any one of us retards.

R. Bateman said...

"Oh, hey Mr. Clinton, your cigars will be ready in 10 minutes."

jeff said...

"What do you mean George Lucas isn't doing a remake of 'Return of the Jedi' - I was going to be Princess Leia!"

ORA: "All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up."

"I'm trying to decide where to put my next tat - upper chest or neck?"

Son Of The Godfather said...

Captain Obvious: "They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'"

Son Of The Godfather said...

Army of Mom said...
Oddly enough, I look sort of like this after I wake up after a late-night bender and endless hours of sex.


Thanks, AoM... How is Senator Kennedy doing, anyway? ;)

Adjustah said...

♫ Some crack, some meth', pass out while I singz...theeeese are a few of my favortite things... ♫

Red Neckerson said...

>>>

FEH!!! I wouldn't f*ck her with Son Of Godfather's d*ck!!!

>>>

Carpe Phlogiston said...

SNL knew exactly who to call to play the part of Jerry Lewis in a reprise of the old Colgate Comedy Hour -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GQM-0kaxgmE

Son Of The Godfather said...

Red Neckerson said...
>>>

FEH!!! I wouldn't f*ck her with Son Of Godfather's d*ck!!!


Neither would SOTG.