Saturday, May 24, 2008

No Escape


1. "Hey! Quit hoggin' the Suicide Booth! That jazz guy s-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-c-k-s!"

2. Larry Craig's invitation to "Meet me by the men's room, and I'll blow your horn" was badly misinterpreted.

3. George Michael was furious that the trumpeter was playing "Faith" without paying him royalties, but with his dick caught in the rest room door, there wasn't a thing he could do about it.

4. Paid for by a Nancy Pelosi earmark, San Francisco's "Afternoon Jazz at the Glory Hole" program enriched the city's artistic and cultural landscape.

5. A record turnout for "White Jazz in the Park."

Best of Rodney Dill
New Orleans Funeral Dirge... Fail

Best of Two Dogs
When Bill got pissed at Ted, he simply dropped him off at the Chuck Mangione Music Marathon.

Best of attmay
Jim not only killed a guy by the men's room, but then ran off and made "wah, wah, wah" sounds with his trumpet. The jury deliberation took 15 minutes before he got life without parole.

Best of Army of Mom
Where will you be when your laxative kicks in?

Best of mega
Rain, unemployed musicians, flannel shirts, and a nice warm place for drug addicts and teen prostitutes to hang. Uhm....Omaha? No, wait...uhm...

Best of Seoulman (R)
While playing a Sousa piece, Gary couldn't hear Big Jimmy screaming about "Little Jimmy" was stuck in the door

Best of Chrees
Tooting in stereo

Best of Van Helsing
Thanks to the tendency of the technotoilet doors to close on people's noses, he finally had a audience for his horn playing that couldn't run away.

22 comments:

Rodney Dill said...

New Orleans Funeral Dirge... Fail

mpur said...

Wait! Doctor! Don't leave me here!

Two Dogs said...

When Bill got pissed at Ted, he simply dropped him off at the Chuck Mangione Music Marathon.

Dang, your number one caption gave me the giggles.

attmay said...

ORA: If you wanna bump it,
Bump it with a trumpet.

attmay said...

Jim not only killed a guy by the men's room, but then ran off and made "wah, wah, wah" sounds with his trumpet. The jury deliberation took 15 minutes before he got life without parole.

divine miss m said...

You never forget your first tromboner.

Army of Mom said...

Blow me.

Army of Mom said...

*singing*

Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now. Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go.

Army of Mom said...

Where will you be when your laxative kicks in?

Army of Mom said...

Jim couldn't control it any longer when Chuckie hit the the brown note.

Army of Mom said...

Willie Wonka, NOOOOO, don't leave me out here with jazzman.

Army of Mom said...

The ATF's newest weapon: Jazzman.

Army of Mom said...

Little known to most radio fans, when he left WKRP in Cincinnati, Les Nessman went on to an even less successful stint as a musician.

mega said...

The Seattle council finally agreed on the playlist: Feelings, Afternoon Delight, and anything by Phil Collins. The desired increase in public acceptance of the new toilets was immediate.

mega said...

Tim took up the trumpet to drown out the incessant sounds of gay prostitution across the street, and discovered it actually wasn't a bad hobby.

mega said...

Rain, unemployed musicians, flannel shirts, and a nice warm place for drug addicts and teen prostitutes to hang. Uhm....Omaha? No, wait...uhm...

Seoulman (R) said...

While playing a Sousa piece, Gary couldn't hear Big Jimmy screaming about "Little Jimmy" was stuck in the door

Chrees said...

Tooting in stereo

Van Helsing said...

Thanks to the tendency of the technotoilet doors to close on people's noses, he finally had a audience for his horn playing that couldn't run away.

jbinnout said...

Maxwell Smart discovered that when he played the shows theme song, the doors closed on someone else's nose.

mklasing said...

The crowd loved the live music at this weekend's Ron Paul fund raiser.

Carpe Phlogiston said...

With only minutes remaining before Hurricane Buford made landfall, Superman found himself locked out of the small Cajun town's only public phone booth, which, ironically, had been constructed with FEMA funds leftover from the last big blow.