1. "See this kidney stone? Now do you understand why Senator McCain is such an ill-tempered crank?"
2. "It's Hillary Clinton's soul, see how it still gives off a faint, hellish glow."
3. "And this is the exact amount of rock cocaine Obama smoked before he said Iran was no threat to us."
4. The casting of Kenny Rogers and Kathy Najimy in the latest sequel came as a surprise to those who thought the Alien franchise had already hit rock bottom long ago.
5. "Did you just hear a tiny voice say, 'Mork calling Orson, Come in, Orson?'"
Best of Foz
When one chicken loves another chicken very very much...
Best of Silhouette
When the obsessively anal-retentive decorate Easter eggs, next on Fox.
Best of Jack Reacher
The Baldwin brothers' brains are represented by this vessel. Stephen's is the inside, while Alec's brain is the hard--but thin and brittle--shell.
Best of Son Of The Godfather
Jim Henson takes a closer look at the damage to Beaker's nose.
Best of Chrees
Professor stereotype #431. Next up...the bowtie.
Best of mpur
Green-n-Gay Development Corp of San Francisco unveils their latest innovation in solar powered sex toys.
Best of Van Helsing
"It made my other fingers melt, let's see if it works on my pinky..."
Best of mega
"Jeez, I am sooooo sick of old guys trying to pick me up with the 'look at my cool pteradactyl egg' line."
Best of Steve O
The world's most elaborate setup for "pull my finger."
Best of Double the U
The Dad from "Family Ties" never returned to television but walked around random locations rambling about his "egg" theory to strangers.
Best of Two Dogs
Willie Nelson and Melissa Ethridge find the "Rising Phoenix" amulet. Hooray peyote!
Best of Seoulman (R)
the unibomber's other brother, the uni-egger