Friday, April 25, 2008

Young boy enjoys boobies


1. Billy's parents hired Debby Lafave as a home-tutor. Years later, when they were too infirm to take care of themselves, he put them in the best rest-home money could buy.

2. A young Andrew Sullivan is horrified by his baby-sitter's inability to accessorize.

3. Eliot Spitzer junior is shocked that his father pays $1,500 an hour for such a manifestly incompetent baby-sitter.

4. The young Dutch boy required years of reparative therapy after being pawed over by the porky gay Shatneresque TV Star.

5. While Billy was transfixed, The Borrowers constructed a working gondola to help them access the higher items in the house.

Best of Army of Dad
Apparently these are a few of his favorite things too.

Best of Chrees
"Hi, my name is booby. I mean Bobbie. And I like video games and boobies. I mean baseball. I...uhhhh...have to go to the boobies. I mean bathroom."

Best of GOP & College
I swear! I haven't been weened!

Best of Rodney Dill
"Where's the blue feet?"

Best of Submariner
Thought bubble; "I'm pretty sure I know why dad always takes her home..."

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Thought bubble: "Remember these for later use. Remember these for later use..."

Best of mklasing
In organizing his childhood trauma defense, Spitzer's criminal lawyers decide to mark this Exhibit 1.

Best of lawhawk
Kid, you don't know what you're messing with. It's not like flying the T-36 back home.

Best of Van Helsing
Next on the list of wonderful discoveries: beer.

Best of attmay
"Don't give me that 'just performing a mammogram' crap again or you're going to be the only denture wearer in the second grade."

47 comments:

Capt. Queeg said...

I CAN HAZ MILK?

shoechick said...

OMG, this is what I have been missing by playing all those damn video games! Why didn't anyone tell me?!?!

mega said...

the Teacher's Lounge, 2008

Army of Dad said...

Apparently these are a few of his favorite things too.

Chrees said...

"Hi, my name is booby. I mean Bobbie. And I like video games and boobies. I mean baseball. I...uhhhh...have to go to the boobies. I mean bathroom."

GOP & College said...

1) Wow! These is better than on the computer screen!!

2) I swear! I haven't been weened!

3) Mrs. Jones, Bobby wanted to go motor boating, but I don't know you stored the boat.

Rodney Dill said...

"Where's the blue feet?"

Shambhala said...

"Where's the blue feet?"

Oy vey.
Too much Animal Planet, huh?

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Billy, if you misbehave I'm sending you straight to bed!"
"Yeah... That would be... uhm... torture..."

Word of warning to anyone curious about V's link in #4... YOU WILL NEED A BRAINSCRUBBER! ick.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Do you smell bacon?"

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Hey doll, you look familiar... Do you remember seeing a kid flying around in a Viper recently?"

Son Of The Godfather said...

"I swear... As my babysitter, you can have your boyfriend over, drink Jack Daniels, smoke, f*ck, whatever the hell you want... All for the price of a measley nipple-peak. Do we have a deal?"

Son Of The Godfather said...

The new Nintendo WEEEE!

Submariner said...

Those look vaguely familiar, but I'll need a closer look to be sure...


Evenin' SOTG.

Submariner said...

You're, uh, no - don't tell me; I never forget a nipple, er, face...

Son Of The Godfather said...

How did that kid master my "Thursday Babe" stare?

Submariner said...

Thought bubble; "I'm pretty sure I know why dad always takes her home..."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Some of us can remember the EXACT MOMENT when puberty hit.

Greets, amigo!

Submariner said...

What say we go sit together in the pink chair in the hall?

Son Of The Godfather said...

Thought bubble: "Remember these for later use. Remember these for later use..."

Submariner said...

Thought bubble; "I am soooooooo glad she's my sister. And that I know when she showers..."

Son Of The Godfather said...

"So... Second cousin, huh?... That's not like, really related or anything, right?..."

Submariner said...

Thought bubble; "Yep! No doubt about it - I'm gonna need glasses."

Son Of The Godfather said...

Young William would later grow up to become the first "black President".

Submariner said...

Now ist der time at Schprocket's vhen ve Schprock it...

Son Of The Godfather said...

Thought bubble: "I would SO Lewinsky all over those puppies..."

Submariner said...

Stephanie? Now I know what toys I want during "bath time"...

Son Of The Godfather said...

Thought bubble: "Maybe one day... If I collect firearms and become an expert at Guitar Hero... Maybe grow my hair out and re-do Mom's basement...Maybe one day..."

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Son Of The Godfather said...

Little Devil On Billy's Shoulder Whispering Into His Ear:
"Just Do It!"

Submariner said...

Thought bubble; "I wonder if Stephanie would slap me if I touched those? More importantly - do I care?"

Submariner said...

Sorry amigo, changed my thought and screwed up your follow-on "fixed-it-for-ya".

Son Of The Godfather said...

Thought Bubble: "If she's got weed in there, this may be the best night of my life..."

Son Of The Godfather said...

How most of us look trying to determine the letters in the verification words.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Mom and Dad should have been clued in when he started wearing his "LICK-FEST" shirt everywhere.

Son Of The Godfather said...

"Show 'em to me now, or I'll scream that you touched me where I pee. Do I make myself clear?"

Submariner said...

Stop by my site, SOTG - Think you'll enjoy the latest couple.

mklasing said...

In organizing his childhood trauma defense, Spitzer's criminal lawyers decide to mark this Exhibit 1.

lawhawk said...

Kid, you don't know what you're messing with. It's not like flying the T-36 back home.

curly said...

“Paper or plastic?” Such probing questions went with the territory when babysitting Sheryl Crows’ kids.

curly said...

“Mommy said that even though your fake boobs cost just $3,000, Daddy was going to be paying at least $3,000,000 for them before it was all over with.”

curly said...

“I hear Hooters is hiring rocket scientists.”

curly said...

“Whaddayasay me, you, and those two beauties form our own polygamist cult?”

Van Helsing said...

Next on the list of wonderful discoveries: beer.

attmay said...

"Look, I know what you're trying to pull. Don't give me that 'just performing a mammogram' crap again or you're going to be the only denture wearer in the second grade."

Double the U said...

Hey toots, if you are going to baby sit me, whatta say I keep an eye on those two babies?

Submariner said...

I don't CARE if they're real, Bambi - they're FABulous!