Thursday, April 10, 2008

East and West Oklahoma


1. "S'cuse me ma'am... mind if I let my wind come sweepin' down your plain?"

2. All right, who ordered the Sooner for a Nooner?

3. Sorry gents, she's actually a member of that lesbian basketball team... the Okla-homos.

4. "Honey, you should sue whoever did that dye job," John Edwards snapped.

5. Google Earth's latest feature allows you to access high-res satellite imagery of T&A from anywhere on Earth. It's called 'Booble.'

Best of Jack Reacher
Senator Clinton looked down from the dais, and seemed to channel Howard Dean when she shouted "We're going to Oklahoma! Yee-argh!"

Best of Submariner
Andrew Sullivan was aroused by the pic, right up until he realized it wasn't the back view of a plumber...

Best of Kaptain Krude
She's got sunglasses on? Really? I'll just have to stare a little bit harder, er I mean a little bit longer, er I mean a little bit more. Yes, more.

Best of Chrees
No wonder I failed geography...I originally thought the great divide was west of Oklahoma.

Best of Seoulman (R)
All this time, I though Oklahoma was a flat state.

Best of Army of Dad
"..and then later I am going to show her my OOOOklahoma face."

Best of Army of Mom
Oh what a beautiful morning!

Best of Seoulman (R)
I'm too sexy for my state

42 comments:

Jack Reacher said...

As the Humane Society reminds us every spring, puppies need air to breathe--even sweater puppies.

Jack Reacher said...

Senator Clinton looked down from the dais, and seemed to channel Howard Dean when she shouted "We're going to Oklahoma! Yee-argh!"

Jack Reacher said...

Nope, still not getting it; can I buy a vowel?

Submariner said...

Motorboats. Why can I only think of motorboats?

Submariner said...

I remember liking "School House Rock" but I don't remember it being this much fun, but proper pronunciation is obviously
"Okla | Homa"

Submariner said...

Andrew Sullivan was aroused by the pic, right up until he realized it wasn't the back view of a plumber...

Submariner said...

If you think that last one's a stretch incredulous, I have a question:
How long did it take YOU to notice she has sunglasses on?

Submariner said...

I bet Rogers and Hammerstein are pleased...

Submariner said...

Jugs, Not Drugs!

Kaptain Krude said...

She's got sunglasses on? Really? I'll just have to stare a little bit harder, er I mean a little bit longer, er I mean a little bit more. Yes, more.

Chrees said...

No wonder I failed geography...I originally thought the great divide was west of Oklahoma.

Army of Mom said...

She's got hair?

Seoulman (R) said...

The scientists who named Pluto no longer a planet are now dealing with another question. Is Oklahoma a flat state belonging in the plains?

Seoulman (R) said...

In her newest performance art piece, Annie Sprinkle shows how B. Insane Obama (D) and H G-d D*mn Clinton (D) are dividing the red vote in Oklahoma

Seoulman (R) said...

Korean movie fans were left confused today as Oklahoma! was remade into a porno and all the kareoke favorites were left out.

Seoulman (R) said...

If you look carefully you will see how the wardrobe malfunction that ruined Oral Roberts University began.

Verity Kindle said...

I've never been more proud of my home state and alma mater. X \
Our motto: More awesome (and boobalicious) than the Longhorns since 1890.

Army of Dad said...

"..and then later I am going to show her my OOOOklahoma face."

Army of Dad said...

Those Sooners sure can lick the opposition...though sometimes they get licked themselves.

Army of Dad said...

Nice boomers, Sooner!

Army of Dad said...

Thank goodness that wagon isn't covered.

Army of Dad said...

I bet she works at a car wash that is NCAA compliant.

Army of Dad said...

If former Sooner Adrian Peterson is nicknamed "All Day", do you suppose this Sooner is "All Night"?

Submariner said...

Didn't know they be havin' smelly hookers in OKC, but that be a jizzen-mast, fer shor, arrrgh...

Submariner said...

Hard to believe it hasn't been taken yet, but Standard Cap #13:

Mom?!?

Army of Mom said...

Oh what a beautiful morning!

Submariner said...

I wonder if she'd allow my dinghy to shelter in her harbour?

Submariner said...

Ode to Rogers and Hammerstein:
The Hills Are Alive...



Evenin' Mom

curly said...

Walking around with a rack like that, I now understand why premature ejaculation is not considered a problem in Oklahoma, “The Sooner State”.

curly said...

Weird Terrorist Fact #357: The KLA (Kosovo Liberation Army) is a bunch of HOMOs who advertise on bosom of buxom young women!

curly said...

Her Oklahoma t-shirt is like a literary battle between “The Grapes of Wrath” and “A Tail of Two Titties”.

curly said...

Despite frequent attempts, Miss Oklahoma has not seen her toes in years.

curly said...

Upon arriving in Paradise – where, thanks to the proliferation of suicide bombers, is running out of virgins – Abdrool agrees "that will count as TWO of my seventy-two virgins.”

curly said...

For once, Sully and Osama Bin Laden can agree on one thing: burkas are a necessiy!

Seoulman (R) said...

I'm too sexy for my state

Seoulman (R) said...

In a surge of state pride, the congress of Oklahoma is considering a new state motto

Oklahoma is more than OK.
Bigger teatons than Wyoming

More silicon than California

Virginia ain't the only place for lovers.

Oklahoma, we aren't as flat as you think.

Adjustah said...

"Okla! Homa!" How Paul Reubens plays Marco Polo...

Son Of The Godfather said...

Are they spelling "Oklahoma" with a "W" in the middle now?

Submariner said...

Oklahoma - home of the t!tt!e twisters...

Steve O said...

What team is Oklalhoma?

Steve O said...

So...what team is OKLA-l-HOMA?

Steve O said...

She's a Sooner, too.
But I'm a Too-sooner.
So, it would never work out.