Thursday, April 24, 2008

Nom Nom Nom


1. Don't you hate it when you go to a party and there just aren't enough chairs?

2. "Oh, yeah, baby, oh, yeah, I'm so hot... Hey! are they serving canapes over there?"

3. "Yeah, it's pretty nice, but not as nice as Chelsea Clinton's."

4. "O.K., but tonight *I* get to be the dog and you have to be Natalie Portman."

5. Contrary to what we all believed, the Bush administration apparently *can* organize an orgy in a brothel with a fistful of fifties.

Best of shoechick
Cherry celebrates her new position on Spitzer's "staff".

Best of Jack Reacher
"Hang on tight, Babe, these pants are slippery...and about to become more so."

Best of Jonathan
"Think of my Happy Place! Think of my Happy Place!", repeated a distressed John Edwards.

Best of curly
Try as she might, Brooke was unable to get Joe aroused without her bacon bra.

Best of curly
Seeing skid marks all over his trousers, Joe denounced Brooks as just another “damn Sheryl Crow follower.”

Best of Army of Mom
The GOP lapdance fundraiser was a huge hit.

Best of Army of Mom
When Army of Dad learned how aggressive the cologne spritzers at Macy's were, he was there every day.

Best of Seoulman (R)
I love you honey, but we really do need to buy another chair.

Best of Seoulman (R)
She wanted him in a way only a woman could know. He wanted her in a way only a man could know. Together they wanted each other in a way that only they could know.

From - Armchair Swinger, wherever Lonely Heart romances are sold.

Best of curly
Nothing was quite as embarrassing as going to the furniture store with Brooke and Joe.

52 comments:

The Man said...

Cherry had no background in politics, but the title of Spitzer's Chief of Staff seemed like a step up from being just a hooker.

shoechick said...

Cherry celebrates her new position on Spitzer's "staff".

Jack Reacher said...

"Hang on tight, Babe, these pants are slippery...and about to become more so."

Jack Reacher said...

Cherry misunderstood her role as "hostess" when she took the job at Victoria's Secret.

Jonathan said...

"Think of my Happy Place! Think of my Happy Place!", repeated a distressed John Edwards.

Jonathan said...

All that's missing is the "This guy is a huge p#ssy" caption.

Son Of The Godfather said...

Hasn't anybody learned from history?!?... I mean, blue dresses STAIN!

shoechick said...
Cherry celebrates her new position on Spitzer's "staff".


Nice! :)

curly said...

“Cling baby, cling!”

curly said...

Try as she might, Brooke was unable to get Joe aroused without her bacon bra.

curly said...

Getting through airport security is not what it used to be.

curly said...

The graphics on my new Dell SX69 laptop are unbelievably lifelike!

curly said...

The conjoined twins had long ago learn to ignore such taunts as “get a room, will ya?”

curly said...

If ‘Synchronized Seat Sitting’ ever becomes an Olympic sport, Brooke and Joe are ready for the gold.

curly said...

Seeing skid marks all over his trousers, Joe denounced Brooks as just another “damn Sheryl Crow follower.”

Chrees said...

Now I know what perks to ask for at my next job.

Whacko said...

"Oh, hi, Daddy. Joe here was, ah, just practicing his, ah, Heim-lick maneuver, or something."

Capt. Queeg said...

"Mmm, this is much better without the red wig.."

Army of Mom said...

Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? No? Well Barack has two left feet, I don't recommend it.

Army of Mom said...

No way? You like Army of Darkness, too? Come here and give me some sugar, baby.

Army of Mom said...

Joe is one motorboating son of a bitch.

Army of Mom said...

Mmmm, tastes like bacon.

Army of Mom said...

Joe finally found his muse. Oh yeah, and a wet spot in his pants.

Army of Mom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Army of Mom said...

The GOP lapdance fundraiser was a huge hit.

Army of Mom said...

Oh my gosh. Black shoes with a navy dress? *tut, tut, tut* John Edwards was very distressed.

Army of Mom said...

On the next "What Not to Wear": Stacy is mortified at the black shoes with the blue dress, but Clint just can't figure out what the two of them are doing

Army of Mom said...

When Army of Dad learned how aggressive the cologne spritzers at Macy's were, he was there every day.

Army of Mom said...

Army of Dad! I turn around five minutes to help dry off the gal you got all wet and now you're motorboating this little hussy? Well, at least scoot over and let me in!

Army of Mom said...

Where will you be when your laxative kicks in?

Army of Dad said...

Where will you be when your laxative kicks in?

Army of Dad said...

That is the trouble of Capping together!

Army of Dad said...

Now that is how I would let a girl mount me!

Submariner said...

John Edwards was appalled; when she said she mounted things for a living, he thought she was a taxidermist...

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

Yes, I see; the wainscoating panel color DOES match it...

Seoulman (R) said...

I love you honey, but we really do need to buy another chair.

Seoulman (R) said...

Does this crushed John make my butt look big?

Seoulman (R) said...

I said get off, NOT get it off.

Seoulman (R) said...

She wanted him in a way only a woman could know. He wanted her in a way only a man could know. Together they wanted each other in a way that only they could know.

From - Armchair Swinger, wherever Lonely Heart romances are sold.

Seoulman (R) said...

Honey, if you want to produce breast milk, you need to eat something, you know like food.

curly said...

Amerikkka’s musical chairs aficionados have come home to roost.

curly said...

Nothing was quite as embarrassing as going to the furniture store with Brooke and Joe.

Kaptain Krude said...

"Excuse me, sir, have you heard about the Lord?" Missionaries started getting desperate in the final days.

Kaptain Krude said...

"You got chocolate on my bacon bra!"
"Mmmft mmft mmmnmt mmmfnt"
Two great tastes that taste great together.

GOP & College said...

1) I CAN SEEZ UR BOOBZ! K THNX BYE.

2) Sully sayz: I DIDN'T ORDER DIRTY PILLOWS!

GOP & College said...

Rewording of #2

I ORDERED FRESH PILLOWS, NOT DIRTY PILLOWS!!!!

mega said...

Heather had always thought the whole student-stripper thing was stupid, but when Harvard raised its tuition 12 % this year, she decided she would give it a shot.

Steve O said...

An embarrassing picture of Steve O leaks out on the internet...

Steve O said...

Steve O looks for an indication that his date might go out with him again.

Submariner said...

There oughta be a sign;

Slippery When Wet.

lawhawk said...

So, that's what happened to my camera. Thanks for being so nice and downloading all my photos V. Much obliged.

lawhawk said...

Ms. Seymour's tastes have definitely improved since Axl.