Brender
1. ORA: Sargon opens himself to a multi-million quatloo sexual harassment suit.
2. SP ORA: With his internet finally restored, Randy Marsh is once again able to access Medieval Spherical Object Gang Bang Pr0n.
3. Number 4 in the list of "Top Ten Ways to Get a Lifetime Ban from your local Bowling Alley."
4. When melons go really, really bad.
5. Wearing a miniature Death Star on your groin is one good way to distract people from your hideous mullet.
Best of duke of red
Help, Help, I'm being repressed!
Best of shoechick
It's only a flesh wound.
Best of Jack Reacher
Now we see the violence inherent in the system.
Best of curly
Ellen DeGeneres soon discovered that her ‘one really huge bellybutton ring to rule them all’ shtick wasn’t cutting it at the Renaissance Faire .
Best of Silhouette
Sir Hurts-a-lot.
Best of Son Of The Godfather
Games You Can Play Only Once:
Catapult Dodgeball
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"You were supposed to throw the Holy Hand-grenade after THREE!"
Best of curly
“It really burns when I piss!” Dating Lady Brittany Spears was a real challenge to the art of leechcraft.
Best of Whacko
The French soldier's taunt to 'f*rt in his general direction', resulted in two unpleasent surprises;
1) The f*rt had consideralbe more mass then expected and,
2) For a Frenchman, his aim was quite accurate.
Best of attmay
"Scalpin' tickets to Spamalot, eh? I don't think so, buddy!"
Best of Rodney Dill
"Well I was able to dodge the wrench."
Best of Rodney Dill
Do Not Taunt Happy Ton Ball
Best of Submariner
Good thing I didn't tell him to keep his EYE on the ball...
Best of Mr. Right
Magic 8 Ball: "Signs point to eunuch"
Best of Mr. Right
"You fool! The PalantÃr of Orthanc must never be used as a hacky sack!"
57 comments:
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!
Help, Help, I'm being repressed!
Allow me to be the first to say:
It's only a flesh wound.
The Lord of the Rings meet-up group ended in a really nerdy, but violent way.
Now we see the violence inherent in the system.
Following Barack’s humiliating score of 37, Obama’s bowling ball salesman was never heard from again.
The “get medieval on his ass” scene from Sully’s remake of ‘Pulp Fiction’ quickly degenerated from hilarious to disgusting.
With a tavern name like ‘The Prancing Pony’, Frodo Blackbaggins expected the bouncers to be a little more understanding about his toe tapping hijinks.
The boisterous argument between the gay bowling ball salesman and the male hairstylist as to whether the Pope was ‘fabulous or simply divine’ at the reception for the visiting Pontiff was left unsettled.
Ellen DeGeneres soon discovered that her ‘one really huge bellybutton ring to rule them all’ shtick wasn’t cutting it at the Renaissance Faire .
Fighting two armored knights alone? He sure has balls.
Sir Hurts-a-lot.
Passing a kidney stone, medieval style.
"We warned ye' not to sleep with Dirty Mary the bar wench... We'll take ye to the apothacary where ye may buy some of the majik elixir, penicillin."
V, all five of your caps - Nice!
Over the years, the tales of Arthur had become romanticised... "Removing Excalibur from a stone" has wider appeal than a "extracating a d*ck from a bowling ball".
"Jeeebus! It's the middle ages for crissakes! Has the cannon even been invented yet?!?"
Paintwars have devastating consequences in Lilliputia.
Whose laughing at the idea of a chastity belt now?
Games You Can Play Only Once:
Catapult Dodgeball
Cindy Sheehan, in her media whoring frenzy, accidentally protested the wrong war.
Too ORA?
Phantasm - cheap shot
"We lance boils a little differently in these parts... I'll go get my lance... and trusty steed..."
Funniest Home Videos: Medieval Edition
Awesome Band Names #376:
Saxon Vasectomy
"You were supposed to throw the Holy Hand-grenade after THREE!"
Jeebus soon regretted his “Sir Kobe – I’m open” taunts.
Mixing up the canisters marked CO2 and O2, Inflatable Scrotum Guy wished he had paid more attention during high school chemistry class.
“It really burns when I piss!” Dating Lady Brittany Spears was a real challenge to the art of leechcraft.
One of the many questions I’ve had about the of making bowling ball porn: what happens when it gets stuck?
Middle Earth’s cannon balls come home to roost.
Apart from the bowling ball, rubber-soled shoes, asphalt playground, and the "K through 8" bulding in the background, it's a pretty accurate portrayal of the time period.
If you look close, I think that's actually a soccer ball painted black to make it look all 'medievally'.
Break'em Like Beckham
In medieval times, the hick crackers would cling to their cannon balls.
Hillgarth the Questionable recalls his visit to London, where he had to run from the carraige while avoiding French sniper fire.
I'm ever upper class high society
God's gift to ballroom notoriety
I always fill my ballroom
The event is never small
The social pages say I've got
The biggest balls of all
CHORUS:
I've got big balls
I've got big balls
And they're such big balls
Dirty big balls
And he's got big balls
And she's got big balls
But we've got the biggest balls of them all
And my balls are always bouncing
My ballroom always full
And everybody cums and cums again
If your name is on the guest list
No one can take you higher
Everybody says I've got
Great balls of fire
CHORUS
Some balls are held for charity
And some for fancy dress
But when they're held for pleasure
They're the balls that I like best
My balls are always bouncing
To the left and to the right
It's my belief that my big balls
Should be held every night
CHORUS
And I'm just itching to tell you about them
Oh we had such wonderful fun
Seafood cocktail, crabs, crayfish...
Ball sucker
Awesome Band Names #433:
Kinky Sauron
When you acquire an evil, magical "monkey's paw", it's best not to wish for "the largest penis in all the land".
“Yes We Cannon!”
(In the highest squeakiest voice allowable by law)
"It's just a flesh wound"
Sorry shoechick... I stole your caption (In the best Paul Stanley voice allowable by law)
The French soldier's taunt to 'f*rt in his general direction', resulted in two unpleasent surprises;
1) The f*rt had consideralbe more mass then expected and,
2) For a Frenchman, his aim was quite accurate.
Sully was disappointed by his Google search for "manhandling big black balls"
Minus Tirith minus Timmoth.
"Scalpin' tickets to Spamalot, eh? I don't think so, buddy!"
At last the cup was invented in 1483, and gay flesh-eating soccer balls became less of a menace.
"Well I was able to dodge the wrench."
Do Not Taunt Happy Ton Ball
The curse of Dick Weber
This ought to make an interesting madrigal, Sir Robin...
On second thought, he'll try the bunny.
Now that we know the terminal velocity of the aforementioned cannonaded soccer ball is 1,283 ft/sec, how do we make use of this to determine the terminal velocity of an unladen sparrow?
Well then; at least he now has one...
NO, dummy use your other head on the ball!
Good thing I didn't tell him to keep his EYE on the ball...
Just as the poor knave was nabbed by the Queen's personal guard, his Magic 8 Ball read: "Signs point to eunuch"
"You fool! The PalantÃr of Orthanc must never be used as a hacky sack!"
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