Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Mary Anne Got Busted for Mary Jane This Week

1. "I don't care if you *are* the Governor of New York, B&D is a fifty per cent surcharge."

2. The other castaways were astonished that the professor had built a sophisticated, fully functional B&D dungeon from bamboo and coconuts.

3. Dawn Wells had always dreamed of making a movie with Calista Flockhart...

4. Visiting the West Bank in 1998, Mary Ann was sentenced to 21 days in a Palestinian prison for wearing Yasser Arafat's headdress.

5. Mary Ann reacts in horror as Hillary whips out her 'Little Buddy.'

Best of Ace Comments
Kaylee from Firefly is living proof that the Professor fu*ked Mary Ann.

Turns out Dawn Wells can get arrested in Hollywood.

Wicked Best of Chrees
I guess the writers of Lost have really run out of ideas in their flashback sequences.

Best of Submariner
Heck, the coconut cream pies weren't the ONLY things getting constantly baked on that island...

Best of Submariner
Really, Gilligan; can't we get past the chains and sh!t and get right to the hot monkey sex for once?

Best of Double the U
Well that is one half of my Gilligan's Island fantasy...

Best of Jack Reacher
"Wait, before you shoot this scene, I have so got the munchies."

Best of GregMan
"Please stop telling me about Ron Paul! I can't take it anymore!"

Best of Braniff
"Gilligan, who in the hell is this 'Jeannie' you keep yelling about?"

Best of Army of Mom
I have to:
Where will YOU be when your laxative kicks in?

Best of Army of Mom
Dawn Wells personal ad: looking for 420-friendly fella who likes to sail; long walks on the beach; and bondage.

Best of prince of leaves
"'Summon the kraken'? Gilligan, whatever are you talking...about........oh."

27 comments:

Submariner said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Submariner said...

Heck, the coconut cream pies weren't the ONLY things getting constantly baked on that island...

Submariner said...

How'd you THINK Mr. Howell made his fortune?

Submariner said...

It's the only thing that helps me get the taste of Ginger out of my memory...

Submariner said...

Y'know, truth be told, she's the one I wanted for a prom date...

Submariner said...

OK, SOTG - I'll "puts the lotion on its skin..." just put that little, er, uh, "hose" away, please?

Submariner said...

Really, Gilligan; can't we get past the chains and sh!t and get right to the hot monkey sex for once?

Double the U said...

Well that is one half of my Gilligan's Island fantasy...

Jack Reacher said...

"Wait, before you shoot this scene, I have so got the munchies."

Jack Reacher said...

"Wait until those cops see my F*** The Police tattoo."

The Man said...

Just one toke....please

Chrees said...

I guess the writers of Lost have really run out of ideas in their flashback sequences.

GregMan said...

Shrillary's intern fantasies kept getting wierder and wierder as her poll numbers fell.

Submariner said...

Seriously, Cannibal Man; wouldn't you be happier with the Skipper? I can arrange it if you let me go...

GregMan said...

Great, now my #1 teen-age fantasy is up on the Internet for all to see...

GregMan said...

"Please stop telling me about Ron Paul! I can't take it anymore!"

mklasing said...

Prior to their execution in Iran, Ahmadinejad requires that all gay boys be chained and forced to dress up like Mary Ann.

Braniff said...

"Gilligan, who in the hell is this 'Jeannie' character, you keep yelling about?"

Army of Mom said...

I keep humming the Tears for Fears song "woman in chains."

Dammit. I blame you, V.

Army of Mom said...

Dawn Wells: Porn Bondage Queen on the next E True Hollywood Story.

Army of Mom said...

Now, if I could only get some old white elected official to pay me $5000 to bang me, I could pay a top notch lawyer to get me off ... er, acquitted.

Army of Mom said...

I have to:

Where will YOU be when your laxative kicks in?

Army of Mom said...

Oddly enough, I have this outfit. The chains, too. Not pictured: whips or Army of Dad in his leather chaps.

Army of Mom said...

I've got your little buddy right here!

Army of Mom said...

Dawn Wells personal ad: looking for 420-friendly fella who likes to sail; long walks on the beach; and bondage.

prince of leaves said...

"'Summon the kraken'? Gilligan, whatever are you talking...about........oh."

Steve O said...

Yeah, like this makes me totally want to do Ginger instead of Marianne -- NOT!!