Saturday, March 22, 2008

Childhood Trauma Saturdays


1. "And if you tell anybody about this, Billy, Mr. Cottontail is going to butcher your whole family! You don't want Mr. Cottontail to butcher your whole family, do you Billy?"

2. "I like the way you nailed your sister's Cabbage Patch doll to the background to remind the folks of the true meaning of Easter."

3. Every young boy in Massachusetts looks forward to Barney Frank's annual Easter Egg Hunt and Body Cavity Search.

4. Client No. 11, with his fetish for pederasty, plush, and bow-ties, was eventually revealed to be George Will.

5. "Levitating dolls with your mind is the work of the devil, Timmy."

Best of prince of leaves
Jimmy Carter and Whitley Strieber were surprised to discover they shared a common, and very strange, memory of an early childhood easter.

Best of Double the U
Sondrak had all sorts of odd pictures before she settled on the "Kibosh" theme.

Best of Son Of The Godfather
Young Donnie Darko

Best of ochagirl
A man, in a costume, Timmy? Why, no. I'm the genuine Easter Bunny. Your parents would never, ever lie and play with your fragile, developing mind, Timmy.

Best of Adjustah
The Velveteen Embarrassment.

Best of Rodney Dill
"Just think of it as a third slight misplaced ear Billy."

Best of Submariner
I kinda don't f'n THINKso, Mr. Bunny; and if you don't move that front right paw, Dad's gonna show you just how UNLUCKY a rabbits foot can be...

19 comments:

prince of leaves said...

Jimmy Carter and Whitley Strieber were surprised to discover they shared a common, and very strange, memory of an early childhood easter.

prince of leaves said...

"Silly rabbit! Tricks are for governors!"

Jack Reacher said...

"What are the odds?" asked Sully. "I nailed both of them!"

Jack Reacher said...

The Obama campaign's release of a photo of the candidate's minister at Easter time was, to say the least, unconvincing.

Double the U said...

Sondrak had all sorts of odd pictures before she settled on the "Kibosh" theme.

Anonymous said...

BAAWAAHAHAHA!!! That's my husband when he was a kid! I'm really in trouble now!!!!!

Son Of The Godfather said...

Young Donnie Darko

ochagirl said...

Barney Frank finally found the one job where he could get close to boys without fearing overwhelming public judgment.

ochagirl said...

Remember, Timmy, never accept candy from a stranger, except when that stranger is a pedophile in costume.

ochagirl said...

A man, in a costume, Timmy? Why, no. I'm the genuine Easter Bunny. Your parents would never, ever lie and play with your fragile, developing mind, Timmy.

Adjustah said...

The Velveteen Embarrassment.

Rodney Dill said...

"Just think of it as a third slight misplaced ear Billy."

Army of Dad said...

Looks like Harvey is trying to get in on the Easter Bunny act too.

Submariner said...

When E! returns from the break:
Inspiration hits a 9 year old Hef with a concept he wouldn't be able to implement for more than two decades...

Submariner said...

I want a Red Rider BB gun in my basket. If you don't come through, the fat guy in the red suit will...

Submariner said...

hehhehhehhehhehhehheh, I'm hunting wabbits!

Submariner said...

Know what I learned in Scouts, Mr. Bunny? How to field strip a coney in under 45 seconds. Wanna see?

Chrees said...

Harvey and I sit in the bars, have a drink or two, play the juke box...

Submariner said...

I kinda don't f'n THINKso, Mr. Bunny; and if you don't move that front right paw, Dad's gonna show you just how UNLUCKY a rabbits foot can be...