Friday, February 15, 2008
Zombie Party in my Pants, Part II
1. Susan Sarandon explains why she supports Code Pink.
2. "So, finally, I just got sick and tired of that loser stoner grandson of mine missing dinner all the time, and decided to get involved in politics."
3. "The acid was better at Woodstock, but this is still a pretty good protest. Wanna shag?"
4. "And that was in 1977, and I'm still waiting for those Mr. Microphone guys to come back and pick me up."
5. John McCain, your prom date is here.
Best of Jack Reacher
Wow, Alan Alda has sorta let himself go.
Best of GregMan
"Yes, I gave birth to John McCain's love child. He's 65 now and he just retired from his job at the Post Office."
Best of AM42
"My grandson, Moonbeam, was last seen getting into a white van with a gray-haired man in a blue sweater..."
Best of Jay Guevara
"And back in the day, I got bingoed by every guy with a guitar. But now I can't give it away. I blame George Bush!"
Best of Son Of The Godfather
Where will you be when your last brain cell dies?
Best of Robert
Supple, pouting breasts. Firm thighs. Shame you two don't get along.
Best of Son Of The Godfather
"I attribute my longevity and beauty to hemp products, hating the country that allows me to be an imbecile, and Cheese-Wiz."
Best of mklasing
In one spontaneous moment all of Phyllis Diller's plastic surgery reversed itself.
Best of attmay
"I've been protesting the AmeriKKKan War Machine ever since I protested that warmonger Woodrow Wilson's unwarranted attack on the German people."
Best of prince of leaves
"...and YOU sir are NO Horace Greeley!"
Best of Army of Mom
My, my, my. I haven't had anything long black and hard in my face like that since the Civil Rights movement. Speaking of those lovely Black Panthers; are they here?
Best of Submariner
...and please tell that b@st@rd O'Reilly to sit on it and rotate.
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51 comments:
Wow, Alan Alda has really let himself go.
VtheK, your first comment made me snort coke through my nose. Umm, Pepsi-coke, I mean. Hilarious!
Isn't this a little late - yesterday was Thursday...
"Yes, I gave birth to John McCain's love child. He's 65 now and he just retired from his job at the Post Office."
Wow, Silky Pony has really let himself go.
"And I'm going to vote for Clinton. What, DeWitt isn't in the race anymore?"
"I truly rely on my Depends to keep embarassing accidents from happening while I'm protesting the Bushilter-Cheny-Halliburton regime."
"I'm only here to get me some of that hot-aging-hippie man-love."
I see that they've finally applied terror alert color codes to STDs.
"My grandson, Moonbeam, was last seen getting into a white van with a gray-haired man in a blue sweater..."
Damn... Dan Rather has really let himself go.
This is the unfortunate result of the Heather that had two mommies.
"Now it can be told - I am Lucy Ramirez. And I want to give a big shout out to Dan Rather. Hey, Dan!"
"And back in the day, I got bingoed by every guy with a guitar. But now I can't give it away. I blame George Bush!"
"Don't tell me what the founding fathers meant by free speech, sonny. I was THERE!"
"Seriously ma'am, is there anything on you that's still naturally pink?"
"Well, I used to wear the shag-boa as a fashion statement. Now, it just kinda holds things up."
Agreed about V's #1 - Awesome.
"What do you mean have I ever 'met a mucil'?"
Understanding the importance of good P.R., Code Pink selects their most attractive, youthful member as spokesperson.
Looks like someone's destroyed Dorian Gray's portrait.
Where will you be when your last brain cell dies?
Yes, sonny, the collar and cuffs match.
Supple, pouting breasts. Firm thighs. Shame you two don't get along.
I've gotta go. My laxative is about to kick in.
My grand-daughter, Dolores, is a teacher at Hogwarts.
"I attribute my longevity and beauty to hemp products, hating the country that allows me to be an imbecile, and Cheese-Wiz."
Grasping arm: "Oh dear, another stroke."
Can we order a Code Red for this Code Pink?
In one spontaneous moment all of Phyllis Diller's plastic surgery reversed itself.
"I've been protesting the AmeriKKKan War Machine ever since I protested that warmonger Woodrow Wilson's unwarranted attack on the German people."
The cryogenics experiment was a failure. Alice was a 19-year-old stuck in a 66-year-old body. She had a decades of stupid mistakes to make up for.
Ladies and Gentlemen, The world's oldest cheerleader.
"...and YOU sir are NO Horace Greeley!"
"And then Senator Obama threw a water bottle. But the funny thing is, I wasn't feeling faint at all until it hit me square in the forehead..."
Wow...the nuthouse must've been hard on Britney.
"No, this is the Noode Pimp protest...you want Code Pink, over there..."
I get my kicks above the waistline, Sunshine.
"Nancy Peloci's too neo-con extremist for my tastes."
"I aborted all of my children, but if I had a man/bear/pig son, the last thing I would want him to become is a Marine."
“Capitalism should be a crime -- except for those dear tax payers who pay my rent, buy my food stamps, supply my health care and give my SSI. The rest are pure evil!”
Thankfully, this is not a scratch and sniff.
Well, it really isn't a feather boa. It's my intestines. They're just that wrinkled.
My, my, my. I haven't had anything long black and hard in my face like that since the Civil Rights movement. Speaking of those lovely Black Panthers; are they here?
Are we still in Little Rock? Sweet Sweet Connie is searching for the Grand Funk Railroad concert. And, her Geritol.
Sweet Sweet Connie needs lots of lube these days to do her act.
*someone will have to explain this one to my dear young husband*
This is what happens after you bone the devil. Where did Hillary go, anyway?
Fox interviews Geriatric Barbie
"we lefties are smarts and cultureds, right wings are nuts"
"...and Charles Johnson lies. That nice Dan Rather would never make up a news story..."
I got this galaxy from Orion, so back away before I go "Tommy Lee Jones" on your backside.
Pardon me, but I speak 'jive;' may I help?
Actually, I was hoping one of you would leave it FOR the beaver...
Sorry, I don't watch your station. Perhaps if you were as unbiased as that nice Keith Olberman?
...and please tell that b@st@rd O'Reilly to sit on it and rotate.
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