1. "I Must, I Must, I Must increase my bust..."
2. Even in China, you can always spot an affirmative action hire.
3. The New Gillette Mach 4K ... 4,000 blades for a shave so close, even a Chinese thug feels as smooth as Patrick Stewart's head.
4. "Don't you hate it when that happens?"
5. "O.K., give him the Klondike bar."
Best of prince of leaves
The workout demonstration for the new recruits was going well, until Sargeant Yee got his tongue caught in the knockoff Jack Lalane Power Excerciser and had to be airlifted to Hong Kong for reconstructive surgery.
Best of Shayne
Chinese orthodontic torture was never as popular as their water torture.
Best of Jack Reacher
Due to spiraling demand for their services, torturers were kept so busy in China that some dissidents were forced to torture themselves.
Best of Silhouette
But in Communist China, Bo Frex Yu.
Best of Uchuck the Tuchuck
An instant after this photo was snapped, the left handle suffered a catastrophic structural failure. The ensuing backlash stuffed Wang entirely into his own scrotum.
Best of Adjustah
Yeah, I get it, his name is, "Ping". Now come over here and help me find his Adam's apple...