Monday, December 10, 2007

A Swap We Can Believe In

SondraK

1. "I don't care how magic you are, a skinny little halfrican like you ain't comin' between Oprah and a free buffet!"

2. After hearing Andrew Young say Bill Clinton had slept with more black women than he had, B.O. decides to double up.

3. Knowing the punishment "Little Mohammed" was in for, BO secretly dreaded "Obama Time."

4. "Check out the back row. Shirley MacLaine and Jerry Springer are cat-fighting over who gets to be Kucinich's 'Celebrity Beard.'"

5. "Say what you will about Hillary, the shine she put on Mrs. Obama's broach is amazing."

Best of The Man
To improve attendance at her events, Hillary started handing out 'Hillary's favorite things'. However no one wants used Q-tips and a unfaithful husband.

Best of Mr. Right
The Big "O" lends her support to The Big "0" (Zero).

Best of Rodney Dill
BO: '...and now I'd like to introduce my wife to the big O'
Mrs BO: 'Promises, promises...'

Best of Double the U
You're right Oprah white women are really dumb and gullable, you can sell them anything!

Best of prince of leaves
And then suddenly, the Wardrobe Malfunction nobody wanted to see...

Best of prince of leaves
With a quick flick of the wrist, Oprah flung the shuriken into Michelle's throat. "All mine, he's all mine now!"

Best of Jack Reacher
When her husband's hands lingered too long on another woman, Mrs. Obama warmed up her collar-mounted Taser.


15 comments:

The Man said...

Change we can believe in...as opposed to change we cannot believe in such as 2 nickels and a dime as change for a quarter?

The Man said...

To improve attendance at her events, Hillary started handing out 'Hillary's favorite things'. However no one wants used Q-tips and a unfaithful husband.

Mr. Right said...

The Big "O" lends her support to The Big "0" (Zero).

Mr. Right said...

"Hey, Sugar... let's get you back to that hotel room so I can show you why they really call me 'The Big O'!"

Mr. Right said...

...And just as the Senator embraced the succubus, his wife was enveloped in a blue flame and disappeared into thin air, never to be spoken of again --- and, just as advertised, it was a change everyone could believe in!

Mr. Right said...

While the Senator's chief political advisors were leery of its potential upside, thanks to Oprah's input, a switch of all U.S. coinage to tungsten based alloys was now the central plank to his Presidential platform.

Rodney Dill said...

'...and now I'd like to introduce my wife to the big O'

(WV=brfuuk)

Double the U said...

You're right Oprah white women are really dumb and gullable, you can sell them anything!

prince of leaves said...

And then suddenly, the Wardrobe Malfunction nobody wanted to see...

prince of leaves said...

With a quick flick of the wrist, Oprah flung the shuriken into Michelle's throat. "All mine, he's all mine now!"

Mr. Right said...

Manna from the gods to be found here, dear V...

http://wdef.com/video/giant_spider_attacks_space_shuttle_atlantis/12/2007

A still of that video could be great cap fodder!

Jack Reacher said...

Taken just before Obama head-butted Oprah, this photo shows the moment when she said "Sweet Lord, you could launch an airplane with those ears!"

Jack Reacher said...

When her husband's hands lingered too long on another woman, Mrs. Obama warmed up her collar-mounted Taser.

Whacko said...

"Look, black candidate boy, my endorsement of you don't give you no right to rub that thing all up on me!"

attmay said...

OBAMA: Whaddya say you finally ditch Steadman and get with a REAL man for a change?

OPRAH: Do you know where I can find one?