1. "You were right, Barbra, they are *So* much more manageable once they've been2. "... and have 22 young maidens from the village been ex-sanguinated for my beauty bath? Excellent."
3. "Hi, Paris? Yeah, I just wanted to call you, Lindsay, and Brittany and thank you for making a demented old slut like me look classy by comparison."
4. "Guy, I just can't decide between going on another awful tour or making another terrible movie."
5. "Oh, Guy, is there anything better than having 500 milliliters of fetal stem cells coursing through your blood veins? Gawd, I hope they never outlaw partial birth abortion!"
11 comments:
There ain't NOTHIN' like a virgin in that picture.
Desperately Seeking StemCells
Madonna's youth has been Swept Away
Sean, I'll be there as soon as I ditch this no-name loser I married. Wait for me?
Sean, get the jet ready - it' still summer in Havana.
Madonna realized she would have to hold the right side of her face up for eternity because the botox didn't take.
Doesn't she look peaceful? Almost life-like.
Madonna's minder keeps close, ready to catch her should she slip, to guard against hip fractures.
"Kobe! Thanks for calling. Yeah, yeah, you know me: Still open."
Madonna alway's carries Guy's testicles around in a little pink bag.
"Yes! I would love to open for the Rolling Stones. Will they have oxygen and walkers for us all?
I also want it written in my contract that I get a nap between
numbers. And if Eddie van Halen
shows up, I quit."
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